


Marked Wrists

by Vminne95



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dancer Jung Hoseok | J-Hope, Dancer Park Jimin, Domestic Fluff, Emotional, Family History, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Kim Taehyung | V, M/M, Nightmares, Pining, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Relationships, Romance, Science, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-06-13 01:57:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 49,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15353679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vminne95/pseuds/Vminne95
Summary: Soulmate AU where the first time you touch your wrist to the place where your soulmate's heart is, their heartbeat is etched onto your wrist and beats in sync to it.Jimin and Taehyung have been in love for years and are hundred percent confident about being soulmates. As expected by everyone, Taehyung's wrist bares the mark of Jimin's heart however Jimin's wrist remains bare. What could have possibly gone wrong in their love?





	1. Nightmares

Tonight it was screaming. Jimin preferred the screaming over the moaning. Or the crying. Jimin imagined someone, somewhere in a control room of some sort, rolling a three sided dice to decide their nightly routine. ‘Why do we have to go through this fate?’ He shuddered because a thought like that was classified as blasphemy but Jimin didn’t know of such a word to exist, he just knew how it felt. Fate meant more than a religious belief. Everything was fate and fate was everything, there was no difference in those two things. No religion had an impact on their lives because that was an ancient thing that people in the history books believed in. 

It was a reflex, to roll near towards Taehyung and to hold him, in whatever way was the most quickest. Taehyung just needed to know Jimin was there and that’s all that mattered. The fear of losing your soulmate was something that had been planted into his head from the moment Taehyung had found his soulmate.

“I’m here,” Jimin said with the same level of reassurance he put into it those words every night, which was all the reassurance he could muster.

‘What shitty luck,’ Taehyung had thought countless of times. Imagine waiting your whole life to finally confirm who your soulmate is to only find out you are not his. Taehyung’s life had begun and ended in that same minute. That one minute of his life had decided a lot more of his future than anything else ever had. At first it was disbelief, surely fate wouldn’t be that cruel to him? But fate had been exactly that cruel to him. His and Jimin’s was a rare case, but not that rare. When the whole world revolved around soulmates surely some anomalies were to be expected. The controller had to spice things up somehow, and apparently Taehyung and Jimin were the ones to provide it with that spice. That kick that it needed in a world nearly everyone met their soulmates and continued life in the most normal way. If you had to put it into perspective, it was like the archaic times when people got married and lived their “normal” life after the ceremony. The day of finding your soulmate was held at the same level as the day you got “married” but Jimin and Taehyung had only read about that word in books and it was hard to imagine how the concept of marriage worked. They knew nothing other than the sacred revealing of your soulmate, on a day chosen by two people. It was a dangerous day, most didn’t do it as early as Jimin and Taehyung, but they had been so certain and yet look where they were.

Taehyung’s breathing slows down a little and Jimin inhales after a long while, he didn’t know he had been holding his breath all this time. Jimin’s eyes are closed, sleep still lingering and his mind still hazy. Taehyung’s was a whole different situation, his wide eyes was piecing the dark room and it landed on the moonlight pooling over on the wall in front of him, the same moon under which they had both dreamt under of a future that was just perfect for the two of them.

They both knew that thinking like this was a sin. If sin is really the correct word. Whatever the word was, it didn’t matter to them. All they knew was that they didn’t sign up for this shit. All they wanted was an average life, where from lovers you upgraded to soulmates and that was that. They had their whole lives planned out, under skies of blood they had written their future together. Even though fate wanted something different, both Taehyung and Jimin were going to go against it, they didn’t care about this system, one where they supposedly did not love each other equally.Bullshit.

This is what they talked of together, but alone with their thoughts at 3am it was hard to convince themselves that this is what they believed.

Tonight Taehyung felt like his heart had been ripped out; he felt a pain that was so harsh he wanted to ask Jimin to call an ambulance, because surely this type of pain wasn’t just in his head. It felt was a physical pain, rather than an emotional one.

Jimin’s small hands fumbled in the dark until they found his best friends, he intertwined them together and squeezed softly.

“I’m here,” he repeated, he would repeat this until Taehyung would squeeze his hands back, to let Jimin know his words were being registered. And finally he feels the squeeze on his hands, it’s almost painful, but he knows it’s because Taehyung is fearful, not because he wants to hurt Jimin’s hands.

When they are finally back to lying down, Taehyung curled up into a small ball and Jimin surrounding him like a fire blanket, calming down the flames that were burning in Taehyung’s soul. “I love you. I will never love someone in the same way as I love you. Only death can separate us Tae, please believe me.”

Until the day of the ceremony and Taehyung finding out he was not Jimin’s soulmate, the idea of the two not believing each other was not a thing that existed. They had believed each other without question, no matter what was said. Their bond had been one that everyone around them had envied, but since the day of the revealing, a fear had creept into Taehyung's heart that Jimin was unable to control, and Jimin couldn’t blame him. Jimin only hated himself and his stupid fate and his stupid wrist for not having Taehyung’s beating heart on it. He had wanted to burn into his wrist the image of Taehyung’s heart, but it wasn’t a manual job, because if there was a price a to pay for such a job to be done, Jimin would have done it. Even if it meant for one minute Taehyung could know that Jimin was his soulmate, he would have traded his life for that one minute of his lover’s happiness. But there was tempering with the mark of the soulmate, no matter how rich or poor you were.

Jimin was thankful that today his lover wasn’t shaking with sobs that made both of their bodies tremble at once. The days Taehyung woke up crying were the days Jimin found it hard to forgive himself, he knew it wasn’t his fault but he couldn’t shake the idea that if it wasn’t for him then Taehyung would be a happier person. Taehyung was always against this idea, to Taehyung the sadness he felt each night was overridden by the happiness that only Jimin was able to give him during the days. No one had made Taehyung feel the way that Jimin had made him feel. Taehyung would also give away his life if it meant he could reassure Jimin that Taehyung was his soulmate because the pain that Jimin was in could be felt only by Taehyung, even before the ceremony they had been able to feel each other’s emotions like their own.

Theirs was a relationship that was clouded by too many promises and secrets that they themselves found hard to even keep up.

Jimin went out far less, he left the house only for university and even that he only attended to a point where none of his lectures would realise he’d been gone for too long. This painful ordeal had been going on for over a year now, they had done the ceremony when they were both 21, on the 23rd of February. At 22 they were both two different people. Jimin and Taehyung were a part of the “sunshine line” of their friends; it included Hoseok, one of their best friends. They had gained this title because all three were extroverted and loud and making friends came naturally to them. But since the day Jimin found out that Taehyung was not his soulmate, he had not wanted to meet anyone new, he wanted to be at home where he only met people he already knew. He had distanced himself from anyone who didn’t have a soulmate already. Taehyung tried to convince him to give this up, it wasn’t going to help his mental health and he needed other people to gain energy as an extrovert, but Jimin was adamant that if Taehyung was not his soulmate then he didn’t need one. The day that he had uttered these words, both of them barely slept that night, in case someone had heard Jimin and they would be caught, by whom they did not know, but the fear still lingered. 

“I love you too Jimin, and luckily for you, I have the proof of that,” Taehyung laughed mockingly. Jimin’s breath held for a second, he felt like he had been snapped in two. He knew Taehyung was hurting, so was he himself, but for Taehyung to say this was to have the knife that was already in his chest to be twisted in deeper. His body felt like steel, he didn’t want to hold onto the love of his life any longer, he wanted to be out in the fresh air, under the moonlight, running until his feet gave up and his lungs were exhausted. He suddenly couldn’t stand it in this room, how could Taehyung not understand that he was already in pain? That he didn’t need such cruel words to make him feel worse?

They both had cried in each other’s arm trying to decide who had it worse countless times. It was a conclusion that no one could draw, but tonight, after that comment Jimin felt like he did have it worse. This wasn’t the first time Taehyung had made such a remark, but it was hard to get used to being hurt by the person you loved the most in the world. ‘Please let him be my soulmate, just for a minute, just long enough to for him to know I love him the as much as he loves me, take all the years of my life, but please accept this request of mine’, prayed Jimin to however was in control of this system that ruled the world.

Jimin didn’t say anything but Taehyung felt Jimin turn into stone next to him, he felt that sickly pleasure you get from knowing you’ve hit the target in its place. The problem with letting someone love you is that you know their weakest point, you know what to say to hurt them the most and Taehyung was using that right now.

He wanted the reassurance that Jimin had, he wanted to know Jimin would not love anyone more than he loved Taehyung, and to get this reassurance he was going to do anything. He knew it wasn’t Jimin’s fault but if it wasn’t his fault then whose fault was it?

‘If I can love him enough to be my soulmate then why can’t he? How am I lacking? We have always been equal, from the first time we met when we were 4 years old. For years we have promised that we are equal then why the hell am I not his soulmate but he is mine? What kind of fucked up life is this?’ Taehyung thought.

Taehyung felt the wetness of Jimin’s tear on his neck as Jimin was turning his face away from him. Jimin didn’t want Taehyung to know he was crying, but he was a second too late, Taehyung felt the drop fall as he was turning his head. Paralysed in the curled up ball that he was, he felt Jimin soundlessly leave the room, his dancers feet were light as a cats and hardly made any noise. Taehyung wanted to stop him, to say sorry, to let him know it was because of his own pain that he had said all this. But he couldn’t do anything as Jimin prepared to leave the house. Taehyung could see everything crystal clear in his head, every movement of his soulmate. His eyes were closed but it was a like a film running behind his eyelids as to what Jimin was doing.

He could see Jimin stooping down to put on his running shorts and a t-shirt that was left on the floor near the door. The back of his hand rubbing away at the tears that kept clouding his vision, Jimin had a hot temper so after about 3 times of wiping away at his tears he would just let them fall. Jimin was now at the front door, by now he was gasping, Taehyung could actually hear his sobs from their bedroom. Even though Jimin was a silent crier, he wanted all the tears to come out so he could focus on his run, that was the only reason why he could hear him. Jimin was always very logical, he liked to do things the correct way, and he wasn’t going to let his crying get into the way of his run. Taehyung could see Jimin’s small vainly hands on the doorknob, white as a ghost, his head against the door frame. Was it weird that as well being able to see exactly what his soulmate’s actions were he was also able to know what he was thinking? They had lived with each other for too long. But this wasn’t a side effect of being soulmates because Jimin knew Taehyung’s thoughts as well as the latter did. Jimin was swearing at himself now, he was telling himself to get a grip. If Jimin wasn’t crying he’d have said “get a handle on the situation” and made Taehyung laugh with his awful puns.

By now he was already at the end of the street, Jimin was a very fast runner, he was the second most athletic in their group of friends, the best was their youngest friend; Jungkook but Taehyung didn’t want to think about Jungkook right now, he was hurting enough.

Taehyung lies there, picturing his best friend run street after street, he feels the lactic acids in his calves, he gasps for air because he knows Jimin’s lungs are burning and needs oxygen. He breathes long and hard, maybe somehow, in some way, this would help Jimin run better. He connects his brain with Jimin, he begs him to come home, to fill in the emptiness of their bed. Taehyung wouldn’t sleep until Jimin got back, not until he knew his soulmate was next to him. Since the 23rd of February 2017 they had not spent a night alone, they had tried once but it had ended with Jimin having to travel for 2 hours through the night to get to Taehyung, because he was sure Jimin had left him for someone else and he wouldn’t calm down until Jimin was there holding him until he fell asleep.

‘Jimin when are you coming back? Please comeback…what if I have taken it too far this time? What if he doesn’t come back…’ Taehyung sits up in bed and screams.


	2. Oatmeal aka The Devil's meal

 “Can you please not give me a panic attack and put the mango juice on the counter, you know I hate it with a burning passion.” Jimin wanted to strangle Tae, his hair a mess and a goofy smile on his face. ‘How could he look so cute? Who even allowed for such a thing?’ He pondered, like every other morning.

“Stop thinking about how cute I am whilst I am still here, you’re doing nothing but fuelling my vainness.” His mouth was so jammed packed with cornflakes that most would have strained to understand what language had just been spoken in.

Jimin is the first to wake up; it takes a lot of coxing to get Taehyung to wake up. Too many kisses and cuddles for anyone but Jimin to bother with such a thing. Everyday begun in the same way and neither of them would change it for the world. Jimin likes being on time for lectures, and his university being the way it is, starts at stupid o’clock; 8:30am. Who in their right mind has university at that time? Lectures were such dicks, but he was always one of the first in the lecture hall, and at the front… the reason behind it wasn’t just that Jimin was a top student in all his classes, it was also because when he went in early he met less people on the way, the corridors were empty and he had less chance of bumping into anyone new. Love changed you, from being a social butterfly that made everyone fall in love with him; he was now a cold hearted person that people rarely saw anywhere. To Jimin this sacrifice was nothing, he would do anything to prevent Taehyung seeing another person’s heart etched into his wrist that wasn’t his own.

Everyone had a protective barrier on their wrist; it was given at hospital and made out of a matter that adapted along with your growing body, no one ever even felt it being there, it felt so natural. Jimin’s protective barrier had been broken on the day of the ceremony so now whenever he touched anyone’s heart with his bare wrist he would be performing the ceremony with them, even without his consent. But of course this would mean that once a person has performed their first ceremony they would be free to tap their wrist at any stranger’s heart to seek out their soulmate, like contactless card at a supermarket. To prevent this you had three chances, blow these and you would be without a soulmate, not to mention the pain each new person comes with.

They had both spent the past year studying anomalies in this system, Jimin used most of universities databases researching any article and every article to find anything that would change his fate. He hadn’t come up with anything to solve their problem but thankfully he had once found a rule that had made them both feel a little less isolated in this game of fate.

Jimin had been perched on the windowsill, the cool autumn breeze flowing in through the gap that was big enough for Jimin to climb out of. He liked to be here, it made him feel less sleepy and he was a nature freak, they both were, so the trees outside provided him with a sort of calmness that he welcomed with open arms.

The article he had stumbled upon was one that stated that once you have performed the ceremony with one particular person, you could do it again and again on that person without it being taken out of your three chances. The three chances didn’t mean three wrist-to-heart touches, but three different hearts of different people.

Taehyung had come running, not because Jimin had made any sound of such, but because Jimin’s heart on his wrist was beating at a race that he felt when Jimin was at his peak excitement, which Taehyung knew all about. But 3pm in the afternoon and with them being in separate rooms, what was causing this feeling? Taehyung nearly fell off his chair, he ran without seeing, he had to get to Jimin before anything happened.

He scooped Jimin into his arms.

“I’m here,” Taehyung murmured. He tried not to imagine what the boy in his arms had found out. He wasn’t sure he wanted to hear it at all.

“I don’t know if this will help us, but look what I found,” Jimin had been able to tell Taehyung after minutes of being comforting by the latter.

“But if I’m not your soulmate after the first ceremony what will make me yours after another chance? I still have the _same_ heart. All it means is that you won’t have to wear your protective wrist barrier when you are with me,” Putting emphasis on the word “same”. Was he being too harsh? It was just too hard to find any happiness in this finding, it didn’t really change much.

“It could lead to something, if there wasn’t someone who had tried it more than once with the same person then why would this article exist? I just need to find something more, but this does mean that people have tired it before us, that we are not the only ones.” Hope flickered in Jimin’s eyes in the same way a candle does when left near an open doorway.

“I want to hope that something will come out of it, if not just find me that other losers number so we can talk about our shitty luck together.” Taehyung had said, it made Jimin laugh so that was a success.

However, since the day of their ceremony Jimin had never had his wrist’s bare, no matter the weather or what situation he was in, he always had an extra layer to cover his wrist. The only exception, of course, was when he was alone with Taehyung. Taehyung also had a fake “protective barrier” on his wrist, it looked like the authentic one that you were given on your first day on being alive, he had found it on a site that looked way too dodgy for the things it sold. For Taehyung it was to hide Jimin’s heart on his wrist, because he didn’t want to imagine the pain Jimin would go through when people judged him for the lacking of his mark.

Jimin was so jealous of everyone who had already found their soulmate, because they all had the habit of putting their wrist on to their own heart to feel both their hearts beating together. Everyone always said that was the most beautiful feeling to ever exist.

All his life he was used to excelling in whatever he did, he rarely had ever failed in any aspects of his life. His parents were known as that annoying couple who never stopped boasting about their son’s accomplishments, but for once Jimin had failed, failed the true love of his life so now all his life’s accomplishments seemed to mean nothing to him.

Right now Taehyung can see Jimin softly staring at him across the kitchen; he has the softest of look on his face. Jimin’s face has only ever shown that endearing love for him, no one else, he knew this because as well as Jimin being conscious of not falling for anyone else, and Taehyung was always on the look to see if Jimin was showing any signs of falling for anyone but himself. He knew every inch of Jimin, inside and out, and any change was flagged like a red warning flash in Taehyung’s eyes.

It also helped that he knew Jimin’s heartbeat; he knew the pattern for when Jimin was fearful or anxious… or when he himself walked into a room, or when they kissed. Jimin’s heart didn’t beat the way it did for Taehyung for anyone else, but even without this mark etched onto his wrist he knew that. They had known they were in love with each other years earlier. Taehyung never doubted the love Jimin had for him, but he was still scared that Jimin would find someone in the future that was his actual soulmate. Societal norms are burnt into the brains of people in much harsher tones than one likes to acknowledge.

‘Maybe I’ll die and then he’ll meet someone. Maybe he is a lucky bastard that gets to have multiple soulmates. Maybe the asshole is a vampire…’ Taehyung’s face lit up in a grin.

“Dude, hear me out,” Taehyung said whilst simultaneously shovelling another spoonful of cornflakes into his mouth.

“Taehyung its quarter past 7 and I am still battling with sleep, please leave my already fried brain alone,” Jimin mumbled into his oatmeal, Taehyung nearly threw up at the sight of oatmeal. It was the devils meal. ‘Maybe he is a devil; the possibilities are endless for this jerk’ concluded Taehyung.

“Taehyung, can you please stop looking at me whilst holding conversations in your head, it’s really distracting.”

“I have a million dollar idea of what you might be.”

“You mean the most perfect person to have ever existed? I already know that babe, that isn’t a new idea,” Taehyung kicks Jimin across the table which makes Jimin choke on his oatmeal and this time Taehyung went to the sink because he was actually going to give up what he had for breakfast after that horrendous sight.

But Taehyung didn’t mention his million dollar idea to Jimin, not that he will keep it a secret from Jimin, he will tell him during their next talk, under some stars somewhere or lying on the floor of their living room. It was just in the mornings they both liked to forget this whole soulmate drama existed in their lives and go on pretending like they hadn’t already had the ceremony, to themselves and all of their families and friends. It was just easier that way, to imagine every morning as a fresh start, a new beginning and another day on which Jimin’s bare wrist would miraculously have Taehyung’s beating heart on it.

‘I hope I am dead when Jimin does find his soulmate, if he has another human’s heart on his wrist whilst I hold him I will go to jail for a murder case.  HA, sucks to be him because I’m determined to live till 100, he’ll be old and grey before he finds his soulmate…What a loser!’ Taehyung thinks all of this as Jimin cleans up the kitchen table; he giggles a little at this thought, which gets him a death glare in return.

He avoids thinking about it seriously, that no matter how old Jimin is, nor how frail, the idea of Jimin loving someone more than he loves Taehyung is something unbearable.

Unfortunately for this pair, vampires do not exist and neither do devil’s in the form of humans. Their problem was a lot more realistic and nearer to heart, excuse the pun, than either of them wanted to accept. It evolved average humans; and they were closer to them than they would have ever believed.

“We can’t believe you had breakfast without us.” And in walks the two headaches in human form that are Jungkook and Taeyeon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave any comments you have regarding this chapter, my writing style and any improvements I could make. Or any suggestions to what you think will happen next, or what should happen next.  
> Please share this story in any way, and anywhere you like. I just want people to find happiness in my story.  
> Please anticipate the next chapter coming in a day or two!


	3. Everyone and Everything

 “Maybe if I ignore them, they’ll go away,” Taehyung says to Jimin whilst putting his head onto the kitchen table. His eyes fall on the key mark Jimin had made on it. Jimin may be smaller than Taehyung, but the strength that little body had still amazed the latter every new day. That day Jimin had come home, exhausted from the lengthy dance practices that he was accustomed to. Taehyung heard the door groan as it hit its frame. ‘Jimin is going to cause an uproar today and I can’t wait’ Taehyung had thought whilst sitting a bit more upright, getting himself ready for what was coming. The exhausted dancer didn’t say anything; he just stabbed his keys into the table, before looking at his lover with eyes that said ‘Calm me down before I burn this house down’ and Taehyung had obeyed. Taehyung learnt much later that night the reason for this outburst of anger; Jimin had seen small girl on the road on her own, nearly falling onto the road whilst the mother paid more attention to her phone.  Jimin cared too much about the world around him, he wanted to fix everyone and everything and it killed him to acknowledge just how less control he had over things.

“And good morning to you too my beloved twin,” grins Taeyeon. 

Jimin sometimes thought that if you didn’t look too closely you’d never be able to even tell these two were twins. Taeyoen had a much smaller figure; he was tiny at the shoulders which was the opposite of Taehyung’s. The younger twin struggled to put on weight no matter what he ate and his parents had done everything they could do to help him grow in the same way as his twin, but to no avail. ‘Childhood traumas do really shape you for life’, Jimin thought, remembering all the hospital appointments him and Taehyung had gone to with Taeyoen when they were little. Jimin had met Taehyung for the first time there.

“How do you always find your way into our house?” Sighed Taehyung. He just wanted to have a morning without these nuances sprawling around his house for once.

“It must be the twin connection that brings me closer to you bro”, he was helping himself to the nearly rotten bananas that neither of the house occupants had bothered to eat.

“I know for sure it isn’t that because I always find myself at the opposite side of the city from you.”

“Jimin, how do you keep sane with him being around you nearly 24/7, I only come here for you, you know,” says Taeyeon, with half a banana in his mouth. There wasn’t much this set of twins shared, but talking with their mouthful was one of them. 

“I have had years of practice, and I still find it hard,” Jimin says with a smirk across his face.

“Why are you two here at the same time? I mean Jungkook is practically homeless so I understand his reason but you are you here too?” Taehyung found a weird sense of happiness from getting on his twin’s nerves and he wasn’t going to miss at a chance to jest with the youngest of his friends.

“I saw him at the gym and said ‘let’s go piss off the lovebirds together’ and that was that,” Jungkook finally chirps in, he was too busy filming the sink area until now.

He high-fives Taeyeon on his way to his chair. His big lean body managed to make the already small room seem even smaller. Jungkook ran his hands through his hair and winked at Jimin. This only ended him with a slap at the back of his head from the former.

“This is literally the sixth day this week that you’ve come here Jungkook,” moans Taehyung.

“Dude, it’s only Tuesday. And talking about days of the week, we have dinner at Yoongi and Hoseok hyung’s house this Friday,” Jungkook felt excited at the prospect of getting some good food finally.

“I love not being invited,” but Taeyeon didn’t mean this since his friendship group varied greatly to that of this twins.

That Friday evening they all sat around Yoongi and Hosoek’s living room, feeling overwhelmed from the dinner that they had taken a bit too long to finish. One of the best things about this group of friends was that they gave each other a lot of their time. They were the type to go and get ice cream, as a group of 7, at 2am in the morning or go across the city to prove that the iced tea from that one particular café was the best in town. So it wasn’t unusual for them to be as a group, sharing many meals a month with each other. The whole concept of finding it difficult to get three people at the same place at the same time was something this friendship group couldn’t relate to. They were always together. Be it as all 7, duos or trios.

Jin sat trying to make Yoongi believe that the joke he had just told was in fact funny and Yoongi was trying his best to prove that he was wrong. The two sat next to each other was a unique sight, Jin with his too large shoulders and even bigger confidence and Yoongi with his small, petite self. His legs were curled up and he was trying to not look Jin in the eyes for fear he’d smile and give himself away.

Jungkook, Hoseok and Jimin were trying to complete a quiz Jungkook had found and was adamant to win, Jimin being the second most competitive and Hoseok being very encouraging was the best help he could have asked for.

Taehyung sat showing Namjoon his latest pictures; there was no better man than Namjoon to boost your confidence level. Sometimes the rest 6 wondered if he had a “compliment box” in one side of his brain because it was the 8th wonder of the world as to how many compliments he could produce in a minute.

These seven boys had all come to become a seven piece puzzle; they all needed the other 6 pieces to complete themselves. There was nothing more normal than the group being together. They all shared a bond that no authority or power could break. They all shared a tattoo on their left hand, of a purple heart; it was a colour that signified friendship and mutual love. They didn’t need any sort of fate to determine their friendship.

“Me and Hoseok have something we want to tell you,” Yoongi said with his gummy smile, it was a rare and beautiful sight, just like the perfect formation of a cloud or that exact shade of yellow that is your favourite but you only see it once in your life time and never see that exact shade ever again.

“Oh god if it’s to say Holly’s going to a dog college now that she’s finished her dog high school then I will actually cry”, Jin was never going to leave Yoongi alone, not until he made him laugh.

“What if Yoongi has finally been able to not kill off his 17th plant? Can you imagine that?” Namjoon volunteered, the rest five were shaking their head in unison to say, no, that would be something quite new.

Hoseok moved to sit adjacent to Yoongi, he would have put his arms around Yoongi if wasn’t going to need to use it now.

Both of them rolled their jumpers up at once, together, with a soft smile playing on their lips. There, as is normal and expected, was the two beating hearts. Marking them as the soulmates they were.

The colour drained out of Jimin and Taehyung’s faces. The first emotion they felt they could not put a word to, but the second was a happiness for their two closest friends. Taehyung’s wrist felt like it would explode and his heat felt the same. They both made eye contact, for a split second but before that second was over they were all in a group hug. They pushed their own pain behind, just for now, to bath in the happiness of the group.

The celebration lasted till the early morning. They had all spent about 2 hours making every sort of joke they could about the newly matched couple and then the next 3 in a bar drinking to their happiness, before all making their way to the park, to have deep drunken conversations about everyone’s future. The best thing was that no one remembered any of it, because if they had Taehyung and Jimin would have been in trouble.

“Jimin-ah is a selfish bitch,” was one of the first comments Taehyung made, the five of the friends laughed but and Jimin did too, but for a different reason to the rest.

“I will never be able to give TaeTae the happiness he deserves,” had been something Jimin had said near the middle of the conversation.

“You are so deep dude, if I could move without falling on my face I’d give you a hug,” Namjoon had remarked, not really knowing how deeply the words cut into Taehyung, he was drunk and forgot the words before he woke up from his sleep but they still hurt.

Returning home wasn’t the most difficult part, it was both Jimin and Taehung at once trying to unlock the door. This lock, like every other lock in the world, would unfortunately only accept one key at a time, which was not what it was getting. They stood bumping into each other, neither being able to actually open the door. After what seemed like a very long 5 minutes of fumbling in the dark, both decided to sit on the porch, their backs to the door and facing the moon sailing across the night’s sky. The cold had finally seeped into them after a while and helped to clear their minds.

Jimin’s hand reached to wipe the tears that were slowly soaking up Taehyung’s t-shirt. He didn’t bother with his own. Their happiness did exist in their friends, neither would ever argue on that matter. But with their fragile hearts and even more sensitive attitude towards the whole soulmate system, it was a kick in the stomach to see yet another couple having gone through the ceremony successfully.

They were over the moon about Yoongi and Hoseok having confirmed their soulmate status, but that didn’t take away the pain they felt about their own situation. They were next, age wise that is. Neither Jimin nor Taehyung were ready for the onslaught of questions about when they would go through their ceremony, or the pokes in the ribs with the occupying statement of “You’re next”. Jimin and Taehyung’s parents had been on the case for about 2 years now, every family visit ending in “You have to come and show us, none of your video call business will do for us!” Before the ceremony they used to answer with “You’ll be the first to know” with a wink but since the deceitful day, they couldn’t lift their eyes to look that of their families, of fear they’ll expose the pain that they hid in them.

Jimin laid his head on Taehyung’s shoulder and they sat like that, in the puddle of the moonlight, feeling like they were drowning above water. They saved talking for later, firstly because forming words seemed like a mission in itself and secondly because words would be wasted when neither was ready to hear anything.

The cold could have been an explanation for the numbness they both felt, but the answer closer to the truth was that they were both emotionally numb by this point. At this moment in time they could talk about anything without feeling any pain, they were senseless by the cold and the pain. It was combination of the two.

“If the soulmate mark was not etched onto your wrist either, would we have left each other?” Jimin asked.

“We would have spent our whole lives with each other, without ever performing the ceremony with anyone else. Because if what I feel for you isn’t true love, than I don’t want to know what it is.” Taehyung said simply.

“Right,” Agreed Jimin. Because isn’t that what he was doing currently?  


	4. Cold toast and Runaways

Taehyung woke up to the sound of their nearly broken toaster making the loud clicking sound it makes when in use. Jimin was curled up, his face squashed against the sofa, his small nose looking none existent now. He rearranged himself against his soulmate, to give the latter a bit more room to breathe. He kissed the top of Jimin’s hair; it was a light shade of grey.  This year Jimin was dying his hair to that of the season. He remembered how near the end of March and beginning of spring, Jimin had walked into the living room with hair the colour of cherry blossoms. Taehyung nearly fainted at the sight in front of him. He had dragged himself off the sofa and walked, half drunk in love, to clasp Jimin’s face into his hands. Taehyung could have sworn that Jimin’s lips tasted of candy floss and that he smelt the blossoming of new flowers the whole day. He was enchanted; he had been for a long time and had never stopped ever since.

But now the smell of toast was wafting through the living room door to Taehyung. Jungkook was helping himself to breakfast at 2pm in the afternoon. They had slept through the morning and probably wouldn’t have gotten up till late afternoon if it wasn’t for the youngest. ‘Please let Jungkook make us breakfast too, if he doesn’t, I’m dragging him out by his ear.’ Taehyung thought, not wanting to move as Jimin was a light sleeper.

Jungkook walked into the living room and halted for a second, his heart hurt at the sight. Life wasn’t the easiest when you had 6 friends who were all paired up already. He wouldn’t have said he was jealous, but it was painful to see the three couples making eye contact across the room at parties when something awkward happened and he never missed the small interaction between the couples, the soft brushing of hands when passing each other, the countless times he’d been kicked under a table accidentally. Out of the three couples this one was the one that gave him the most heartache. He practically lived in their house. As they were the youngest they spent more time together than with the 4 hyungs. Jungkook had been asked by Jimin and Taehyung to move in with them, he wasn’t making a lot of money from his YouTube account and it would have been convenient for him. He had refused; he wasn’t going to be able to hide his feelings if they had lived together like he could now. It was still hard, since they were such good friends that they all knew each other like the back of their hands, but Jungkook was good at hiding his feelings nowadays, had learnt it living alone. Jimin and Taehyung were really good in terms of never making him feel like he was a third wheel, or that he was interrupting them. They always spent more time talking to Jungkook than with each other whenever he was around. He was thankful for that, he’d have killed himself if he had ever got the feeling of being a third wheel from two of his best friends. He tried to push all these thoughts to the back of his mind. He tried not to notice the unspoken conversation that Jimin and Taehyung sometimes fell into; they were just so used to each other that they didn’t notice when they were doing it.

“Hyung we’re out of strawberry jam, so you’ll have to make do with butter on your toast,” Jungkook said as he placed the toasts on the table, not looking directly at the sight on the sofa. The soft landing on the table didn’t manage to escape Jimin’s ears.

“Taetae,” Jimin murmured. He tilted his face up and waited to be kissed awake. His hands reached to Taehyung’s cheek and pulled him lightly in, his eyes were still closed, too drugged up in sleep. Before long Jimin was turned wholly towards Taehyung, his hands were in tangled up in the latter’s hair, breathing as if underwater.

Taehyung was initially aware of Jungkook being somewhere in his periphery but after Jimin had put his hand on his cheek he had lost all thoughts of anyone but the beautiful boy who was pulling him closer to himself. He felt like he was on a shaking boat and only Jimin could stabiles his dizzying mind. Everything but Jimin blurred.

Jungkook had seen all of his hyungs kissing in public; it wasn’t a sight he was shocked by. He had taken his seat and was going to turn on the tv and enjoy his toast. Well that was the plan; the small problem was that Jimin didn’t know Jungkook was in the room. Before the unfortunate soul could make his escape he had the ill-fate of seeing the hunger in Jimin’s eye before he pulled Taehyung on top of him.

“This is what you got when you come into someone’s house without everyone knowing you’re there. I wonder if they keep any holy water in this kitchen of theirs, I want to wash my eyes out… and my ears too now.” Jungkook was out into the fresh air before long, wanting to cleanse out what he had just nearly seen and definitely heard.

It was a very long time later that Taehyung had the chance to turn away from Jimin and his eyes had rested momentarily on the toasts left on the table. He wondered at what point Jungkook had gotten a bit more than he had bargained for and had left.

Jungkook had lived with Namjoon and Jin hyung for years, and they were never THIS loud. ’We get it, you know each other’s names no need to repeat it like THAT,’ Jungkook had thought. 

Jungkook was running before he knew it. He was so used to running. Always away from things, he never had anything to run towards. 

He didn’t want to think about the first time he had run away from his home. He’d never returned. 

But yet again he was seeing it all in this head, like a broken video tape on repeat. His family hadn’t been the best off, his parents had moved into the city, built up a family life for them from scratch so that himself and his older brother could go into one of the more prestigious universities and elevate the family honour. Everything was to do with education and your rank in the society. His brother had done just as expected, studied hard at school, chosen the right subjects for college, gone to a well-respected University and had landed in one of the best accounting firms in the city. 

Jungkook had other plans though; he had never enjoyed any school subject that was remotely academic and spent 95% of his time in the performing arts side of the school building. From a young age his parents had not been on good terms with him, every report card ending up with missed meals and long hours in his room. He promised to try harder but it wasn’t his fault, well he didn’t think it was, he just couldn’t get into grips with academic subjects. And why would he even need these subjects if he only wanted careers in the creative media? For his parents jobs of that sort weren’t jobs at all, but hobbies out of the work place. His brother understood him, and so did his tutor Namjoon. That was how 13 year old Jungkook had met his first crush. 

His father had had enough with how things were going with Jungkook and had spent the extra bit of money he had on getting his youngest son a cheap tutor who could do the job. Namjoon was still in his 1st year of college but to make ends meet he tutored 4 younger students from the same school at the evenings. 

They all had lived in the same city, so he must have seen Namjoon around but he had never bothered to pay attention to him. It was on the first day of meeting Namjoon that Jungkook had been star struck. He felt like a billion fireworks were going on in his brain and his stomach had a small tsunami of its own to handle.  

“Thighs” he had gasped out without releasing it was said out loud rather than in the comfort of his own head. 

Namjoon added his dimples to the mix to get the young boy with Bambi like eyes even more overwhelmed than he already was. Namjoon knew his powers and he was going to use them to the utmost for the simple pleasure of seeing the boy in front of him flustered.

Jungkook felt like he was frozen but the ground was moving. He knew by that moment that he was absolutely and totally fucked. His father had wasted his money on this tutor, not because he was bad at his tutoring, but because Jungkook could not focus at all at what was being taught. All he could think of was the perfectness of Namjoon’s smile, or the way he closed his eyes tightly shut and smiled a crescent shaped smile whenever he saw anything cute.

If Jungkook’s test had been on Namjoon he would have scored a perfect one hundred percent. He had used those couple of hours each evening to memorise every feature of Namjoon. He learnt about Namjoon’s passions and dreams, what Namjoon thought about the world and his opinions on current affairs. He knew, like the back of his hands, what Namjoon preferred and what he detested. But unfortunately tests were not based on your crush; they usually had to be on academic content that you would never use in your life ever again.

It was to Namjoon’s house that Jungkook had fled to that night that he was thrown out of his own house.  He was 15. It is a given fact that the memorise we visit the most frequently are also the ones that are the least accurate; every time you visit a memory, you’re changing that memory by just a little. It’s like using tracing paper to get the outline of a shape, the more you trace the less accurate the image becomes. Hence, Jungkook couldn’t really remember what happened that night; he was always getting confused between who said what. Who was the first to mention Jungkook no longer living under the same roof. Who had shouted the loudest?

That night Jungkook had run, not knowing where he was going but that his feet would guide him to where he belonged, because the place he had left definitely was not it. He really didn’t remember the specifics of that night, all he knew was Namjoon had been there to open the door for Jungkook and invite him to enter into the new chapter of his life.


	5. Tigers on the ceiling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Taeyeon is a character created solely for this narrative and he does not resemble any actual person that is living. 
> 
> Taehyung and Jimin met for the first time when they were 4 years old at a hospital.

Jimin was dangling at the edge of his bed looking down at Taehyung, who lay slumped on the floor, with the sweetest smile he could muster. He had just kicked Taehyung out of their bed after all.

“Give me like five more minutes, I just want to feel the warmth of the blanket again, I have forgotten what warmth feels like,” Taehyung complained. He was rubbing his shoulders and pretending to shiver.

“I only kicked you out about ten seconds ago, you overdramatic ass,” Jimin says whilst turning away to get back to sleep since his earliest seminar today was pushed back to 11am. He didn’t want to acknowledge to himself the fact that he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep anytime soon, he may be the one with the warm blanket but it still felt cold and lacking without Taehyung lying next to him.

“You know what I find unfair Jimin-ah?” He was staring at the ceiling and trying to make out faces in the marks along the wall paper. He was sure there was a tiger he had once noticed and he was determined to find it again. Jimin was a better observe than himself, but he wasn’t going to ask the stone-hearted person, who had just chucked him onto the cold merciless floor so early in the morning, for help.

“That my university does not have a fixed timetable which means that I can sometimes have lectures at 8:30am but sometimes at 3pm, whereas you work a 9-5am unless you have out of city visits?” Jimin replied in an instant, he’d heard this a billion times and wanted to punch Taehyung in the face for bringing it up again. Jimin hated his timetable, or the lack of, he should say. Being a children’s nurse meant that he had no weekly timetable, every week he had different sets of lectures, practical’s and seminars alongside all the other descriptive words Universities like to chuck in to make it seem like they give you a varied teaching experience for the extortionate amount of tuition fees you were paying. Jimin liked knowing where he would be roughly at what times during the week, it helped him sort out his life outside of University, but of course his lectures thought that the only thing in Jimin’s life that mattered was University, which was far far from the truth. One factor that his unpredictable timetable affected the most was the dance classes he ran with Hoseok. Jimin wanted to help his older hyung with the morning classes but he was never sure what days he was free.

The frustration about his timetable made Jimin twist around and fall on top of Taehyung, who still had not moved an inch from his spot. Jimin was never able to control his anger when Taehyung was near him. Taehyung was the only person that Jimin entrusted with this particular emotion of his, Taehyung protected Jimin’s image like a dragon does its shiny findings. To the rest of the world Jimin was the epitome of level-headedness, to Taehyung on the other hand, Jimin was the most hot tempered person he’d come across. But he didn’t complain because Jimin’s anger led him to do things to Taehyung that normally they both would be shy to even think about.

Right now Jimin was on top of Taehyung, his knees on either side of Taehyungs hips. Taehyung’s arms were raised above his head as if in surrender. Taehyung could not help but grin at his luck this early in the morning.

“Where is the shame in you two? It’s like 7am or something.” Taeyeon fired at his older brother, who walked into the living room to find his twin sprawled across the sofa.

“Can I just remind you that this is our house, and that we can do whatever the fuck we want to, whenever we want to?” Taehyung snapped at the body on the sofa whilst also throwing a blanket at his brother’s slender body. He looked over his bother with a sweeping glance, he didn’t want to make it obvious that he was worried about what marks the latest hospital visit had left on him this time.

Taeyeon was around a lot of the time but even Taehyung knew that something must have happened for the former to have slept in. Jungkook and Taeyeon were the two people who had keys to their apartments. Whilst handing Taeyeon his key, both Jimin and Taehyung had pretended that they were only doing this so if they do get locked out they had another person close by to get the key from. But in reality, the couple had been worried about Taeyeon’s health and needed to make sure he had some place to go to when things got too much for him. They all liked to pretend that Taeyeon was as healthy as his twin and that not much separated them than their choices in friends or music. Somehow or the other they hoped that pretending Taeyeon was okay would solve all of his problems, it was like staring at a wildfire and only acknowledging how beautiful it looked rather than doing something about it.

 On the other hand, Jungkook had practically begged for his key and Jimin and Taehyung had made him do a billion chores before he had officially “earned” it.

Taehyung’s eye contact with Jimin through the bedroom door was enough to pass on the message of the worry and concern that the former felt about the sleeping mass on the sofa. Jimin would take care of Taeyeon, and that alone made getting out of the house easier for Taehyung.

Jimin and Taeyeon’s friendship was a beautiful one. There was nothing more reassuring than having two people you love the most in the world than for them to get along so well. Taehyung remembered how Taeyeon only stopped screaming at getting his injections when Jimin was holding his left hand and Taehyung his right. How whilst his mother drove Taeyeon to the hospital in the middle of the nights at his relapses, Taehyung and his father would drive to get Jimin, Taeyeon would only calm down when Jimin was in the same room as himself. No parent ever like the idea of their child visiting the hospital, however Jimin’s parents had sacrificed their preferences for the sake of this set of twins that had come into Jimin’s life and had become such an important of it too.

Taehyung may not be the one doing a nursing degree but he had learnt how to interpret an electrocardiogram early on in his life and he loved that himself and Jimin were able to alter his brother’s for the better.

Jimin expertly lifted Taeyeon’s hand and felt for his pulse, from his years of placements at hospitals, he was a master at doing this without disturbing his patients. He smiled as he felt his touch lower Taeyeon’s pulse, he placed this to his caring nature and nothing else extraordinary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave any comments you have for my story, any improvements I could make or anything you will like to feature in it.  
> Please share this story in any way you like, wherever you like, I just wish to make people happy with my writing.  
> I will update in a few days with the next chapter, please anticipate it.


	6. Very Short Shorts and oversized Tee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wondering about chapter 5, it's lot more messier than a simple love triangle. Please hold tight and enjoy...

Jimin sat stretching himself in the corner of Hoseok’s dance studio. The class he was teaching wouldn’t trickle in for another half an hour, but he wanted some time to have the studio to himself and his hyung. He used dancing and Hoseok to de-stress from the long hours of lectures or his placement depending on where he was in his academic year. He made a mental note to text Taehyung to let him know Taeyeon was totally fine by the time they had separated, it was only his anxiety that he had come to theirs to calm.

Hoseok sat on a chair opposite of where Jimin was, he was going on a students in one of his morning classes having pulled a muscle, and how the whole class helped the poor boy back up. Jimin didn’t fail to notice the extremely short pair of shorts that his hyung had paired today with a very large white t-shirt. ‘Only this hyung could pull something like this off’ Jimin thought to himself with a soft smile.

“Hyung, remember when I first joined the class and you had scrutinised me so much that I had cried in the bathroom? I’m glad your student are not like that,” Jimin said, bending himself in half, touching his toes as easily as if he was reaching to touch his nose.

“That was the reason why you became my friend, so don’t go around trying to make me feel guilty.” Hoseok was not going to regret the one action that had caused his oldest friend to come into his life.

Babies learn from their surroundings. At six weeks of babies being born they get put through a developmental check, and one of the first factors that indicate a happy baby is if the child makes eye contact and if they smile. If those things are not present the health care professional has a tiny red flag waving at the back of their minds like that enticing a bull in a ring.  After Hoseok had managed to convince his health care visitor that he was being well looked after by managing both these milestones, the third he went for was to be able to recognise the sound of music and associate it with that of making movement. Hoseok was already enrolled in an after school dance class at the age of 6 and in his first year of high school he was the main dancer for most of the shows the school participated in. Both of Hoseok’s mums were lawyers who had met representing their own clients at court; they hated each other’s guts until they both joined the same evening salsa class. Thus, when Hoseok had said he didn’t want to go to university but have his own dance studio, his parents had agreed without the smallest of hesitation, they both had enough money to keep Hoseok well off until he was at the age to retire. Not that Hoseok would ever need such a thing. All they had wanted for their son was for him to live the life that they had never gotten the chance to live when they were young. Both were forced by their parents to enrol into Law school and neither had the courage to fight for their own selves like they fought for their cases at court.

Hoseok was in his second year of high school and Jimin in his first when they had met. Jimin was a bright eyed, smiling boy who always showed up with another boy at his heels. Hoseok used to look at Taehyung and Jimin move as if they both were bound by some string, like two puppets with the same puppeteer, pulling the pairs strings at the same time.

The day that Jimin was talking of was in the first week of Jimin joining the after school dance club, at first Hoseok thought Jimin was just like the rest of the boys; here to have a bit of fun and spend more time laughing with their friends than actually dancing. It was only after seeing Jimin in the full wall mirror whilst practising that he noticed how hard Jimin tried to make every one of his moves perfect. Hoseok hurt to see the boy try so hard, he knew what the younger boy was going through because he was the same. Being a perfectionist caused more pain than happiness and no one knew this better than Jung Hoseok himself. This connection was what made Hoseok give criticism to Jimin, he wanted this one year younger version of himself to have someone to instruct him through the hard years in front of him, like Hoseok had always wanted but never had.

Hoseok was always the last to leave the class, that was until Jimin begun overtaking him. It was in those hours spent together, drenched in sweat and even tears of frustration that they grew in trust and friendship. They practiced together till neither could move off of the floor or till Taehyung complained that he wanted dinner and Jimin gave in not for himself but for Taehyung.

With time Hoseok saw Taehyung take a liking to him. That day Jimin had walked out with the marks of tears down his cheeks was also the day Taehyung had tried to fight with Hoseok; he didn’t care if the other boy was a year older. No one was going to get away with making his best friend cry. It was only after Jimin had pushed Taehyung back and explained that Hoseok meant well that he backed off. But that didn’t change the look of anger and hatred he felt for Hoseok for a long while. It did change eventually, and that was how Hoseok ended up with this particular pair becoming his closest and dearest friends before the end of the academic year.

It was Hoseok who had noticed the difference in the two younger boys like no one else had. He saw, in the mirror of the dance studio, how over time the way Taehyung looked at Jimin changed.  How the former’s gaze followed Jimin’s every move, at first with awe and then with lust. How from holding Jimin’s shoulder, Taehyung started to place his hand on Jimin’s waist. The way Jimin went from making sarcastic comments at Taehyung’s compliments to his cheeks lightening up with a blush that could put the colour pink to shame. Years later, Hoseok was also the first to notice the marks running along Jimin’s back when he stretched before practice, or how he was keeping on his hoodies even in the summer months and kept on tugging the fabric around his neck. How Taehyung winced sitting down at his favourite space at the back of the studio. Nothing ever escaped Hoseok but as long as Jimin showed up to his classes, Hoseok didn’t care what the pair got up to the night before, or at certain times that very morning.

But the physical change wasn’t the only thing that Hoseok noticed in these two young friends of his, he had the great opportunity of seeing the two of them mature together. From bickering about absolutely everything, getting into fights at the smallest of inconvenience, from pushing each other away, he saw them converse more with their eyes; to understand the other without the usage of audible words. He saw them read each other’s body language as if reading an open book. They still bickered and fought but as the years grew on, they became two individuals that didn’t depend on each other, but wanted to be with each other none the less.

So it would be wrong to assume that Hoseok hadn’t noticed the change that the past year had bought on Jimin and Taehyung. How his two happy-go-lucky friends were now quieter, made fewer plans and were more reserved than he had seen them ever in his life. Or that he was oblivious to the mixture of pain in their gazes, where before it only held love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave any comments you have regarding this chapter, my writing style and any improvements I could make. Or any suggestions to what you think will happen next.  
> Please share this story in any way, and anywhere you like. I just want people to find happiness in my story.  
> Please anticipate the next chapter coming in a day or two! 
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina


	7. One Legged Pigeon

“Baby”, Jimin said into the pillow.

Taehyung looked left to see Jimin’s face buried into his pillow, his hair a dishevelled mess and arms clutching the pillows so hard that his fingers were a shade of scarlet. Taehyung was more than slightly confused, was Jimin feeling sick?

“Yes Jimin-ssi”, Taehyung answered back, he tried to pull Jimin closer to him but Jimin was holding onto his own pillow as if in a death grip. His hands gripping like a vice, for what reason Taehyung was unsure of.

“No, BABY,” Taehyung was struggling to hear the muffled voice, but he knew now what Jimin was talking about.

No one ever gets used to death, it sounds very much like a cliché but you cannot ever take a person losing their life slightly, no matter what profession you held. Jimin had learnt this the hard way. Three years of hospital placement had taught him not how to ever really cope with deaths of children that had bright futures in front of them, but only how to grit his teeth and carry on. Because what else could he do?

Once Taehyung, Jimin and Namjoon had gone out for lunch, it was in the heat of the summer and every outdoor restaurant was buzzing with customers. The people swarmed the streets and shared the collected grief of just how hot the weather had recently gotten. They had encountered an unexpected visitor; a pigeon with one leg. Jimin left his overly filled burger where it was and rushed to get a closer look. Taehyung noticed Jimin’s shoulders go down in defeat; he knew Jimin felt hopeless for this creature that had landed in front of them. Jimin had turned to face both his companions and the look on Jimin’s face had tugged at the heart of both Namjoon and Taehyung. The latter had wished that day for Jimin to not be so empathic, to not feel others pain as if it was his. It only led to Jimin being more hurt than he deserved to be.

So you can imagine just how much it had taken out of Jimin to see one of his patients die whilst they were in his care. Taehyung could barely think about it without wanting to smash a wall.

Jimin had finished his three shifts first before he let his pain out. He wasn’t going to let his emotions cloud the next two shifts he had as the event had occurred on the first day. Taehyung knew all about Jimin’s long shift, how exhausted they left him, how it seeped all of Jimin’s energy like a leech on healthy flesh. Of the week Jimin had four days off, but he needed all four of those days to recover from the three days shift he had. But even so, Jimin made some effort to cuddle Taehyung each night, to snuggle into the warmth of Taehyung’s body. To hold Taehyung in his arms until he felt he had enough energy to actually fall asleep, because sometimes you get so tired even falling asleep takes energy. Taehyung always kissed Jimin softly on those nights, to ensure any harshness of the day at the hospital could be washed away. But things were very different that night because Jimin had come home and had gone straight to bed. No “I’m home” was shouted at Taehyung, no nod thrown his way. Taehyung went and lay next to the curled up ball that was the love of his life, he knew words would not help whatever Jimin was going through, he at that moment did not know what had occurred but he knew it was something too great for him to even take a guess at. So he softly kissed Jimin’s hair and held him until he knew Jimin was asleep.

The next morning barely any words were spoken by Jimin, he was like a zombie and no plea of Taehyung altered the glazed look in Jimin’s eye. However Taehyung did notice Jimin’s reflection in the car’s window before he left the house for the hospital; Jimin’s expression was the one the rest of the world expected from him, the smiling kind student nurse that he was meant to be role modelling. It was like watching a garage door being lowered over his eyes; he was blocking the world from seeing what hid behind the mask of happiness that he put up for them. And Taehyung knew at that moment that he was the only one who saw the broken boy come home shattered from the world’s expectation of “professionalism”. He also knew that both the people he loved the most in the world were the bravest; his twin brother who was forced to battle for his life at a regular basis and his lover who chose to combat against death of his own accord.

It was in the car park after his last shift that he had let himself breakdown. For the first time in that week Jimin allowed himself to cry. His hands gripped the steering wheel so hard that his fingers went numb. He couldn’t see anything; it was like those few seconds of intense blurriness you face whilst you turn the car wipers on. Breathing felt painful and thinking about anything felt even worse.

It was a long while before he managed to locate his phone and ring Taehyung.

“Take me home Taehyung,” was all that Jimin had managed, but it was enough for Taehyung to know Jimin was on his way to recovering from the hell he had been going through for the past few days.

 “Jimin-ah, everything happens for a reason, you did your best,” Taehyung said now, he didn’t know how to continue, he wished he’d just stayed quiet.

Taehyung laid his head on his boyfriends, pried loose his lover’s hands from the pillow and softly kissed his hair.

“I just can’t imagine how much their parents feel, how do you deal with the loss of all of your dreams for your child Taehyung?” Jimin asked knowing full well Taehyung didn’t know the answer, and that made him feel better, at least he wasn’t alone in this world of overwhelming questions that no one ever knew the answer to.

Neither of the pair worked with healthy children, Jimin was a student paediatric nurse whilst Taehyung had a full time job at a charity that provided assistances to ill children to give them a better memories of childhood than only of those made at the hospitals. He was an event leader for regular outings ran for these children to experience life at its fullest; he liked making the children forget for a while that they were any different to the rest of their peers.

“Let’s go and see Kim Yoon-ah and her beautiful dads,” Taehyung suggested later on that morning. “She hasn’t seen her most favourite uncles in a few days.” All of her uncles thought they were her favourite for that matter.  

Today Kim Yoon-ah was wearing a plain white t-shirt with a pair of sky-blue jeans, her hair in a ponytail. Namjoon had dressed her today, both Jimin and Taehyung concluded as she jumped into Jimin’s arms, whilst also reaching for Taehyung so that in the first few seconds of the couple arriving, she was in a sandwich hug.

“Jimin, she has a rash on her forearm, it only appeared in the morning so I haven’t been to the pharmacist yet but I am glad you are here,” normally no one treated Jimin as a nurse whilst he was off duty, the only exception being for Kim Yoon-ah who couldn’t have a speck on her without both of her dads going crazy. Namjoon dived into the web to research about it whilst Jin called up all of his friends in the health sector because the idea of their five year old getting ill caused both of them so much stress that everyone avoided it at all cost.

It was only near the afternoon that Jimin and Taehyung got to sit with Jin, Yoon-ah was taking her mid-afternoon nap. And just then Namjoon had tumbled into the house with so much alarm in his eyes that all three stared at him to provide an explanation.

“I had a lunatic chase me for a lighter for nearly 6 whole streets, I ran in the opposite direction until I lost him and then took a bus home,” Namjoon managed to gasp out, whilst also throwing a glance at the sleeping Yoon-ah on the sofa that spoke volumes. He wasn’t scared of anything happening to him or Jin, but Yoon-ah he wouldn’t let any harm come to.

“Jin hyung, how come you didn’t mention you felt Namjooon hyung’s heartbeat go crazy whilst all this was happening to him?” Taehyung inquired nonchalantly.

“Oh, I thought it was just Namjoon tripping over again somewhere,” Jin said, tugging his beige jumper to cover his wrist whilst Namjoon did the same across the sofa from him, when Jimin and Taehyung were not looking their way.


	8. Clay pots and Reincarnation

Unlike Hoseok, Jimin and Taehyung, the overly loud and extroverted trio, Yoongi was a whole different kettle of fish. He spoke his words sparingly, as if he had a limitation on the amount of words he could use per day. Yoongi was a believer of hearing twice as much as speaking, because after all you do have two ears and only one mouth. Also, talking unnecessarily cost him energy that he would rather save for his music. Because of this habit of his, Yoongi had one best friend growing up and that was all he needed. To Yoongi this one friend was enough to keep him sustained for years because Soekjin’s personality was so varied it was like having four friends in one.

Jin was mature yet the most childlike adult Yoongi had ever known, he was extremely clever but also very good at making dumb remarks at the worst of situations. He worked for hours on end and practiced like there was no tomorrow for his theatre performances but also somehow or the other managed to find time to play every single computer game made for 8 year olds. Jin was able to maintain social contact with literally the whole of the city but yet succeeded in forgetting to text Yoongi back for days. His older hyung was the most confident person Yoongi knew and made other people radiate with second hand vainness, yet he was extremely self-conscious about every small action of his own. Yoongi sometimes looked at Jin and wondered how he had landed with a best friend that wild and crazy, but he wished that in every life he had Jin as his best friend because he couldn’t see his life without him, no matter what he was born as in his next life, even if it was a rock that he was reincarnated as.

Right now Jin had his script for the next play he would perform in his mouth whilst he tidied up the mess his daughter had made with the two maknae’s sleeping on the sofa. Jimin had his head buried in Yoongi’s lap, Yoongi’s hand softly resting on the younger one’s head whilst Taehyung was sat up and sleeping, his head thrown back onto the sofa, Jimin’s feet on his lap. Namjoon was asleep on the second sofa in the room, a book on his chest; his glasses would have fallen off ages ago if Jin had not taken them off and put them on the mantel piece.

“How do you have so much energy Jin? You work full time for a theatre and yet Kim Yoon-ah is the most looked after kid I have met in my life, and Namjoon has never once complained that you can’t make time for him?” Yoongi inquired, unable to fathom his friends never ending willpower to do things. Jin and Yoongi were in the same year at school, since school years were organised from September of one year to August of the next year and after spending nearly ninety-percent of their time with each other Jin was tired of the world Hyung and had ordered Yoongi to drop the honorifics, which Yoongi had taken a very large time to get used to.

“My dad is the CEO for one of the most well-known companies in this country; you really think he didn’t make us do like 17 different afterschool clubs from when we were like 4 years old? That man, even at his old age now, puts me and my brother to shame for how much he can handle.” Jin replied, he put his script down on the coffee table and sat leaning against the sofa that Namjoon was occupying currently.

“Taking about hard working people, Jimin and Taehyung looked like dog shit when I walked into this room, it’s like something is eating away at them both.” Yoongi looked at the small head in his lap, Jimin’s eyes had a similar patch under his eyes as Taehyung’s, neither were getting enough sleep and both had been losing weight on and off for a year or so now.

Jin and Yoongi both knew what they were referring to, but neither knew if it was the right time to talk about it. The topic of Jimin and Taehyung was one that all four of their hyungs thought of, made hints to each other of, but never really said more than the usual “they will figure out themselves, if they need our help they will of course let us know”, because what else were they to say to their younger maknae’s, who normally never kept anything serious to themselves.

“Jimin is back on placement so that half explains why he looks like a walking zombie, and Taehyung texted saying he had a patient pass away on his ward yesterday, he bought Jimin over to distract him for a while. But why Taehyung has those dark circles under his eyes I don’t know, and don’t you dare say they’re having too much sex, I do not want to discuss their sex life whilst me and Namjoon haven’t had one night in since the 2000s because Kim Yoon-ah has a habit of crawling in with us on random nights.”  Jin exaggerated, being a father of a toddler and partnered with a book lover who slept more with his books than with Jin was truly getting to him.

“Jin if you want to vent about your sex life than you may as well get us both a couple of drinks each because I have stuff to get off my chest too,” Yoongi joked, knowing full well Jin and Namjoon never drank unless Kim Yoon-ah was at her grandparents,  but it was worth the try.

“Hoseok has been telling me for months that Jimin doesn’t seem like his usual self, what do you think happened between the two? They have definitely not grown apart from each other, but even more closer than I thought ever possible for humans,” Yoongi knew Jin understood what he meant, so he stopped at that and let Jin ponder over his response. Jimin moved his head a little, and tried to curl up into himself, which meant his feet was dragged from under Taehyung’s guarding hands.

“If they have performed the cere-“ Jin would have continued if it wasn’t for Taehyung who woke up with a start, he stared into the wall opposite and when he noticed it being unfamiliar to the one he usually woke up to, he whipped his head and saw Yoongi on his right with Jimin’s head resting on his lap. There was a look of fire that radiated from Taehyung’s eyes that both of his hyungs noticed before it softened and Taehyung yawned, growing into the soft boy that always managed to win over everyone’s heart.

“Why don’t you both move into bedroom upstairs? You look like you could do with a good night’s sleep or anti-aging cream for that matter” Jin offered.

“I’ve been getting nightmares hyung, if you’re talking about my expensive looking eye bags, they’re in fashion currently, but you wouldn’t know since you’re too old for that type of thing,” Taehyung said with grin on his face, Jin pretended to be hurt and threw his slippers at Taehyung, but he was not going to miss the opportunity to discuss what was on Taehyung’s mind, he had a responsibility towards his Dongsaengs that he would perform to the best of his abilities like the rest of the relations in his life.

“How long have you been having these nightmares? And what are they about, are they recurring?” Jin questioned the half sleepy boy  who was currently staring at Jimin with such longing it was as If they had been separated for years, his hands had taken hold of Jimin’s and he was caressing it with his thumb.

“For a very long time now, please don’t ask me about it, I really find it hard to put it into words what I see, but I know it’s terrible,” Taehyung lied easily, he knew what he dreamt of each night as if it was a recording on his phone, it was the exact same moment, just repeated over and over again; of Jimin leaving him behind for his actual soulmate.

“Talking of nightmares, it’s time for sleeping beauty to go home, tell Kim Yoon-ah her favourite uncles will be back to see how the clay pots have turned out,” Taehyung got up and stretched, both Jin and Yoongi pretended not to see the love bites on his hip, they both shook their heads at once, trying to get rid of the image of their maknae’s that now tortured their mind.

“How could you say that whilst I, her most favourite uncle, am sat right here?” Yoongi asked, whilst showcasing his lock screen which had Hoseok and Yoon-ah smiling like two beaming suns.

“Just move upstairs, there’s no need to go back home this late,” Jin was a concerned hyung and also the most generous.

“I don’t know how I will wake up from my nightmare, sometimes I wake up screaming. No offense but I don’t care about you and Namjoon hyung hearing me scream but Kim Yoon-ah deserves to rest her overly energetic and brainy mind,” and with that he scooped up Jimin in his arms, kissed Yoongi on the forehead and started walking towards the door.

“I wonder how much of a storm these two will create when they realise they aren’t the only ones with a secret,” Jin said to Yoongi, the only person who knew about him and Namjoon.


	9. Swirling dust aka The calm before the storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some of Jimin and Taehyung's cute past, enjoy the fluff in this chapter because vmin's peaceful world is about to collapse very soon.
> 
> As for the lack of Jungkook in these last 9 chapters, it’s because he’ll become the focus from chapter 10 onwards.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is longer than the last 8 because a reader suggested I write longer chapters. If you have any suggests put them in the comments and I'll include it in the next chapter. 
> 
> Also, Jin was talking about his own secret in the last chapter, all the hyungs know Vmin are hiding something but they have no idea what the secret is as of yet.

Jimin and Taehyung lay with their faces centimetres apart from each other, but in the opposite direction. Jimin’s feet rested on the sofa whilst Taehyung’s rested on the tv stand across from it. If they were not facetiming Taeyeon and Jihyun, they would have been pressing light kisses on each other’s noses and lips without a second thought. The morning sunlight swept the living room and made their skin tingle, Jimin couldn’t help but notice the dust that was swirling like ballet dancers in the beams of sunlight, coming down to land on himself and Taehyung without either ever knowing it.

Jimin’s phone showcased a Taeyoen who was eating cereal whilst wearing nothing but shorts, whilst Taehyung’s phone had the illustration of Jihyun, sat in his kitchen.

“How have you been Jihyun-ssi?” Jimin asked with light-hearted concern for his brother who had left his three hyung’s nearly a year ago to study abroad.

“Don’t ask him HOW he is doing, ask him WHAT he is doing,” Taeyeon replied, milk drooling on his chin from the over-spilling spoon of cereal he was attempting to shovel into his mouth.

“Jihyun are you doing drugs?” Jimin’s eyes widened, Taehyung laughed as he felt Jimin’s heartbeat on his wrist hasten.

“He’s doing worse,” Taehyung said whilst lightly caressing Jimin’s hair with his free hand. He tilted his phone so Jihyun wouldn’t see him rub his nose against Jimin’s in such a cute way that Taeyoen made a gagging noise because unfortunately Jimin’s phone was still facing himself.

“He’s doing girls,” both Taehyung and Taeyeon replied. Jimin took a few seconds to acknowledge what had just been said and then the three older hyungs burst out laughing whilst Jihyun blushed one shade off scarlet.

“We raised you better than this,” Taehyung jested at the youngest maknae.

It was true; the three hyungs had been and still was Jihyun’s whole world. He knew he was the most beloved maknae to have ever existed. The day he was born was the day Jimin had met the twins.

The hospital playroom was one of Taehyung’s most visited places in the first few years of his life; Taeyeon had more visits to the hospital than his four year old self could count to. The maternity ward was on the second floor, the children’s emergency wards being on the first. The playroom in question was one floor above, and that was where Jimin’s grandmothers took him whilst his mother was in labour with Jihyun. Taehyung knew what were his favourite toys, where he could hide the most well and the most comfy of the cushions where he had fallen asleep on more occasions than he could remember.

One half of the room was covered in a rug that had the alphabet in bright colours, this is where Taehyung had learnt his alphabets, before any of his friends at nursey had. One wall had small cupboards, with no doors that held all of the toys that the hospital could afford on their tight budget. What none of the children knew was that some of these toys had been donated to the hospital from parents who no longer had anyone to play with them, but no one was going to tell the occupants of the room that.

Jimin had walked into the playroom, his eyes glowing at the sight of all the children milling about. If he wasn’t holding the hand of his maternal grandmother he would have ran and hugged the first child on sight, and that was specific reason for why his grandmother held his hand tight, she wanted him to take in all the children before venturing forth.

Little four year old Jimin, in his light blue overall and white trainers, noticed a boy wearing a bright red coat, a boxy smile and hair that was cut very short. Taehyung looked up then and saw the boy standing by the door, and his eyes rested on the dinosaur that was tucked under Jimin’s arms, his favourite one; the one he never left the house without. Jimin slowly unlaced his fingers from his grandmothers and walked to the boy with the boxy smile, handing him with both of his tiny hands what he loved the most in the world, his green stegosaurus.

The two grandmothers’ sat down with a sigh; they already knew Jimin would not give them any trouble, he was a blessing of a child that every parent dreamt of, his sweet nature was something that every relative of his boasted of. And until now he had never had to share the love of his parents or any of his grandparents. Both the grandmothers wondered how the introduction of a little sibling would change this tiny boy, what they didn’t know was that it wasn’t only one new member coming into their family; by the end of this day Jimin would have three boys in his life whom he would give his life away for without any hesitation whatsoever. Not to mention that these three boys would do exactly the same for him. It was a bond that no one would have suspected of, on that initial first meeting between the two four year olds.

“Do you remember the time I accidentally tackled Jihyun that one Christmas?” Taehyung asked. They had been talking for so long that no one even inquired about where this particular question came from.

Jihyun had been three and the three hyungs seven years old that Christmas, they had decided to have a joint Christmas, because the two families were by now so entertained any suggestion other than that seemed obscured. It was after the Christmas lunch, both the dads wanted to take a nap from the overly filling food but having four young boys in the house meant that they got none of that.

Taehyung had managed to underestimate his strength and also had forgotten the youngest was four years younger, when he had accidentally slammed into Jihyun. The latter had fallen across a fair distant and came with a down with a thud that the three hyungs felt in their own bones. Neither of the two fathers knew who started crying first, the boy in physical pain or the other three who were feeling the pain of their youngest as their own. It took a lot of convincing from the two adults present to let go of Jihyun so that they could inspect where he was most hurt. The three older boys had engulfed the youngest in an embrace they thought would heal, but was actually causing more pain to the hurt one.

Both Taeyeon and Jimin did not speak to Taehyung for a few hours, which left Taehyung in silent agony, he knew he deserved it because he had caused their beloved maknae pain and needed to be punished. It was Jihyun who had woken from his nap and asked for his Taehung hyung, and had insisted they all played eye spy from the comfort of the sofa. For the enjoyment of Jihyun both Jimin and Taeyeon had decided to forgive Taehyung. The picture of all four on the safe sofa, sleeping in odd angles to hold all of those limbs, still hung in Jimin’s parent’s living room.

“I called Grandma yesterday and she was telling me about the strawberry story for the 400th time, that old gem of ours really does love retelling the same story over and over again, but I only enjoy them when it’s all about me,” Taeyoen was saying now, and he remembered this particular story because he saw across from him the stems of strawberries’ he had managed to finish in one seating last night.

Jimin, Taehyung and Taeyoen had gone strawberry picking at the latter’s paternal grandparent’s farm.  All three had matching straw hats and overalls that Taehyung’s mother had bought them from a shop in the village centre. Strawberry picking was something that both the twins were used to but Jimin needed a bit of practice before he started to also excel in it. Jimin rarely took long to pick up a new skill. But at the very beginning Jimin noticed both the twins’ basket filling up much faster than his own. As a perfectionist Jimin was not going to rush just to be competitive, but it was like fighting two demons because he was also a very competitive little boy. Taehyung noticed Jimin’s bright smile starting to dim, and his lips form the pout that Taehyung would eventually fall in love with before too long. Thus, whilst Jimin was grasping the stem in between his tiny fingers and giving it a light twist, which took all of Jimin’s attention, Taehyung slipped more and more of his strawberries into the basket of his friend. Taehyung’s grandmother always laughed at this point of the story where she mentioned that Taeyeon was sat crossed legged some distant back inhaling more strawberries than he had managed to pick.

“Hyung, mum was telling me she was going to gift the yellow coat Taehyung hyung cried over to her first grandchild, you never know if my kids will be the ones to wear it at the rate that you two are going,”Jihyun jested, it got him a virtual high five from Taeyeon from across the phone screens.

Taehyung’s parents had decided to move both their twins to Jimin’s school since it was easier to collect all three boys at once from the same school for when Taeyeon had his appointments. Most of the time Taehyeon created an uproar whilst going to appointments and needed Jimin to calm him down, they were always ever so grateful to Jimin’s parents who allowed their son to miss school for a friend, but with Taehyeon’s condition as it was even the teachers couldn’t argue about it. Where there was Taeyeon there would always be a Jimin and Taehyung.

In the first few days of school, the trio being only five years old and having just started full time school, Jimin had walked in to their already very colourful classroom in a bright yellow raincoat, and matching rain boots to go along. The hood was cast over Jimin’s head and he was dripping in water, it was October and the rain hadn’t stopped for days now. Jimin had been a chubby five year old, he was also one of the smallest so when he entered all eyes looked at the yellow being at the door, and even children that hadn’t spoken to Jimin as of yet was jealous of just how cute this little boy looked. The person most affected by all this was Taehyung whose eyes glistened with so much water that the rain was put to shame outside. He burst into such sudden tears that Taeyeon was sure the girl next to him had hurt him and was about to square up to her. The teachers, all four in charge of the class, puzzled over what could have been the matter but it was only after Jimin had taken the coat off and handed it to Taehyung that the latter’s tears stopped spilling. The adults in charge gave each other a look that said “of course, only Jimin would know what the matter was”.

“When are you coming back next Jihyun? I need you to sort out my desk for me, I have nearly broken it four times now,” Taeyeon complained, knowing full well it was his fault but not wanting to mention it.

“Hyung that’s because you keep on standing on top of it to get good lighting for your selfies,” the youngest mocked, he missed his older hyungs more than ever, he loved his new free independent life in a country that was not like his own but he wanted the comfort of his hyungs that no one else had ever been able to provide him with.

“Before you come do warn us though, our old hearts can’t take any of your surprises,” but the trio knew it was so they could emotionally prepare for the airport, because when Jihyun had left they were all a big mess but luckily Jihyun had been on the plane by then and not witnessed the downpour of tears.

They had felt like they were little kids again, sat in the seven seater that Jimin’s parents owned. Jihyun and Taeyoen sat at the front two seats and Jimin and Taehyung behind them, the seating changed continuously but this was how it was on the last trip to the airport before Jihyun departed for France. Jimin’s mother had been in tears for a week now, she couldn’t let go of the thought of her youngest being away from her, but she knew it was what was best for him and had agreed to the plan. There was no denying that all six of the family members present had cried when hugging Jihyun but the trio had managed to wipe their tears away and hold a smile to their faces whilst their youngest and most beloved maknae turned around and was hidden by the onslaught of travellers. It was only afterwards that the three had made excuses to be alone, Jimin had pretened to spot a friend in the arrival section, Taehyung had chosen the café and Taeyeon had gone for the charging station near the entrance. But they had all made their way to the toilet, all at a different pace to the other, and had let their tears loose.

Their peace marker, the person who chose who wore what when they all argued, the person who decided where they would eat or what part of the city they would visit next was on a plane getting further away from them. Jihyun knew full well that he was the most spoilt maknae out there, he received three times the amount of “hand-me-down” clothes, that were actually all brand new but to avoid the shouting of Jimin’s parents they labelled it that. There was no way that Taehyung had already grown out of that shirt or Taeyoen having lost his interest for that expensive new watch he bought only three weeks ago. Jihyun got what he wanted, whenever he wanted so it was a shock to his system to be so far away from the three boys that was his whole entire world.  

“Can you two stop sharing saliva whilst we’re still here,” Taeyeon interrupted, Jimin and Taehyung had now moved to the kitchen since their rumbling stomachs had announced that it was already lunch time. Their kitchen was tiny, because what else can you expect from a house made specifically for students who used their kitchen as often as they used their iron, which was rarely.

“Excuse me, Taetae went to the bathroom and I’m the only one here,” Jimin saved himself, he picked up the phone with an extended arm and rotated the camera and then picked up the phone to show the entire kitchen.

“Hyung I know I am younger than you but I’m not stupid,” Jihyun said in a pout.

Jimin giggled and Taehyung engulfed him in a hug from the back, if the camera was faced towards them then Jimin would have died of shame because Taehyung tasted Jimin’s neck in way that was more indecent than the pasta that lay on the counter. They were both awful cooks.

Jimin had to elbow Taehyung to get out of his embrace and put the phone back to where it belonged on the table, he had put both the phones against the fruit ball that Jin had bought them. Jin was sure these two would have died from eating crisps as their only snacks and wanted to prove to them that fruit was a viable option.

Jimin bought the pasta bowl to the table and handed it to Taehyung. Jimin was used to handing Taehyung this own belongings with both of his hands, but the thing that the present Taehyung needed the most at the moment he was unable to give him; the satisfaction of seeing Taehyung’s heart etched onto his wrist. And Jimin, sitting across from Taehyung right now, felt a pain in his chest that he knew he couldn’t name even if he did look into his nursing dictionary. He ran his hands through Taehyung’s hair, feeling the softness of each strand across his fingertips, bathing in the reassurance of what his own. Being assured that he would never have to share what he loved the most in the world, if only he knew what was about to unfold he would have not been so confident.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave any comments you have regarding this chapter, my writing style and any improvements I could make. Or any suggestions to what you think will happen next, or what should happen next. 
> 
> Please share this story in any way, and anywhere you like. I just want people to find happiness in my story.  
> Please anticipate the next chapter coming in a day or two! 
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina


	10. Chinks in the armour

“Jungkook, I need to get petrol first so shall we just go to the supermarket?” Hoseok asked knowing full well Jungkook could not care less, as long as he had enough food to last him that week he was as good as gold.

“I heard you had a recent date, how did it go Cookie?” Namjoon was trying his best to get the youngest one talking, both he and Hoseok from the front of the car could tell something was preying on their youngest mind and they had decided to go grocery shopping to get the youngest out of his nest.

At Namjoon’s question Jungkook unwillingly remembered his first few moments being awake that day, sitting at the edge of his bed and surveying his kingdom. He was earning enough from his Youtube career to move into a much bigger flat or even a house if he dared but something about his studio flat appealed to him so much that he didn’t feel the need to.

He liked control over what was his. He had always been like that and it was not a trait of his that he saw changing anytime soon. Thus, being able to sit at any one point in his room and being able to see all that took place within it gave him great satisfaction.

He had glanced at the wall opposite his bed; well you couldn’t really see the wall beneath it, because it was a mosaic of his own art collection. It held, with magnets and paperclips, sketches, photographs, diagrams and lists of video ideas.

There was no denying that the photographs were mostly of his hyungs. They were his everything, since the day he had left his parent’s house and Namjoon welcomed him into his life with open arms. It didn’t take a very long amount of time for them to treat him like he was the most precious of gems. Being the maknae certainly came with a lot of perks and Jungkook made sure he took advantage of them all.

He had wanted to water the array of plants scattered all across his studio, the plants were Jin and Jimin’s idea, they knew Jungkook rarely opened his windows to let fresh air in and wanted to purify the air in any other way possible, and plants were the best options they had. Even in the one place that Jungkook called his own, he saw marks of his 6 hyungs all over. There was not much in this vast room that didn’t have one or more of his hyung’s name across it.

The canvas leaning against his desk was of Yoongi playing the piano, in his plaid shirt and minty hair. The room cluttered with too many musical equipment’s and take out boxes. He didn’t really need to look at the image of Yoongi clipped to the side of it; he could sketch the whole room from his memory as he spent so much time in it. Whenever Yoongi wasn’t working in his studio, Jungkook was. Sometimes they worked together, Jungkook editing clips for his YouTube channel and Yoongi producing music way before the deadline his company had given him. Yoongi may be lazy when it came to replying to texts and any social events, but when it came to his music he was always days ahead of schedule.

The current video displayed on his desktop was a dance tutorial made by Hoseok, he usually filmed this hyung for his dance tutorials because he was such a good teacher and he had many views from the previous dozen that he had posted earlier. The other type of video he produced was Jimin and his contemporary dancing; he mostly did this so he could read the comments under the videos of viewers describing Jimin in the most beautiful ways. He loved finding new ways to describe Jimin but mostly he loved watching Jimin move, in his smooth flawless way.

Namjoon and Jin were his guardian angels. They were the two he spent most nights at, whenever he was stressed he was there, and Namjoon would put away his student’s works, clear a space at the overflowing chair opposite, that usually held all his marked papers, and would look Jungkook right in the eye; wanting to heal the younger who had accepted this older hyung as his own personal advisor. Jin was there for him to bicker with. No one could tell the difference between who was the youngest when these two found themselves next to each other. They were like two brothers who were still stuck at age eight.

Vlogs were the most fun with Taehyung; they did things that made most people’s heart drop. But Jungkook could never really explain just how calm he felt with this hyung. No matter what rollercoaster they rode, what skateboard trick they practiced or what speed they rode on the countryside road, having Taehyung next to him made him feel a sense of serenity that he did not feel elsewhere.

Jungkook had picked up the bouquet of roses that lay at the bottom of his feet; they were from his last date. The roses had withered away to a dying brown colour, but Jungkook couldn’t but help smile at the beauty of the dying flowers in his hands. His love for his hyung was the very reasons why Jungkook had so far been unable to keep any of his relationships alive, he managed to find more time for his hyungs than for his dates, he bought them to his apartment and in the morning when they woke up to realise where Jungkook’s priority lay, they slowly distanced themselves away. Jungkook rarely felt much sadness when his love interests grew distant, he always had his hyungs to distract him and make him feel complete again. He was going to use these dead flowers in his sketch book, because why waste something you could potentially make use of? If western artist could write songs about their ex’s then Jungkook was going to use his ex’s flowers for his art as well, just in a more creative way.

“I didn’t like him very much hyung, his opinions on climate change was very different to the one you taught me,” Jungkook tried to joke with his hyungs, knowing that was what they wanted from him. He didn’t want to tell them the truth of how every date with any stranger felt; wrong. How was he going to tell his hyungs that he envied what each of them had? He didn’t want to tell them that it he found it unfair how they had already formed pairs before he could have a say in it.

“Are you upset about him?” Namjoon inquired; there had been a few men whom Jungkook had tried hard to advance with, however most of his dates Jungkook just did not care enough. All of the six older boys had set him up with a dozen men each, knowing that Jungkook felt left out and wanted a change in his life. They all did remind him that he was only 20 years old and had a long time left to find his soulmate, but Jungkook was one hell of a competitive boy, and even the act of finding love he took as a challenge.

“I spoke to him for a month hyung, do you really think he created that much of a mark on me?” Jungkook couldn’t but help the bitterness seep into his voice, like blood seeping from a wound.

The younger boy tried to capture the scene outside, the rushing of cars and the streetlights. That was one of his favourite things to film; the city lights at night. It made him realise that things moved on no matter how much you felt like you were stuck in the same spot, nothing ever stopped for you like you imagined. Jungkook felt like he had the world’s strongest gum under his shoes, no matter how much he tried to run away, the stickiness of the gum followed him. He left the marks of the dirty gum on the new grounds he stepped on, no matter how hard he tried to get rid of it.

“Jimin and Taehyung said you have not been over to theirs for a while, did they scare you off?” Hoseok admired the youngest couple of their friendship group, they were the two boys who had known each other for the longest, had been in love for the lengthiest of period and yet were stuck in the honeymoon phase. Hoseok also knew that they at all times made sure Jungkook was given the most amount of attention to, whenever the youngest was with them, but as a person who was also in a relationship, he understood how at times without meaning to the couple may have made Jungkook feel left out.  

Jungkook was already thinking about the transitions he would use for this particular vlog, how from the sign on the taxi he would smoothly move it to the neon sign of the same colour that was of the café that was opposite them currently. He was also trying very hard not to remember the look in Jimin’s eyes the last time he had seen the couple in question. He bit the inside of his cheeks until he felt the taste of iron spilling into his mouth, it was a familiar taste and he welcomed it.

“They scarred me for life,” Jungkook replied honestly, he didn’t know how much more he could lie to his hyungs without getting caught, so he allowed this particular truth to spill, he knew it would be taken as a joke by the Namjoon and Hoseok and oh boy was he glad about that. What would his hyungs think of him if they knew how much anger he felt in his body every time he thought of Taehyung and Jimin making love to each other? They would scold him, for ever feeling a way which he was not entitled to.

Jungkook had started a painting of his view from the narrow strip that his landlord had labelled as the “balcony”; the space was so thin Jungkook had to get Jin hyung to help him fit in the two tiny chairs that he wanted on it. From the moment his pencil touched the canvas Jungkook felt a pang of regret, because drawing out his view from his apartment meant acknowledging where he was at this point in time. He had tried countless times to capture more and more of the scenery, but to no avail. Then one day he picked up the canvas and slid it, as hard as he could, under his bed. He was not strong enough to acknowledge the pain he felt whilst looking into the landscape in front of him. Likewise, he was not strong enough to think of the feelings he had for Jimin and Taehyung.

They were the perfect soulmates with no chinks in their armour that Jungkook could widen, or so Jungkook thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave any comments you have regarding this chapter, my writing style and any improvements I could make. Or any suggestions to what you think will happen next, or what should happen next. 
> 
> Please share this story in any way, and anywhere you like. I just want people to find happiness in my story. 
> 
> Please anticipate the next chapter coming in a day or two!


	11. Discoveries and Reactions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, sorry I have not posted for nearly a week, I had family over and could not get away for enough time to write a chapter (I like to write the chapters in one sitting even if it does take a few hours).  
> Thank you so much for all the comments, they are literally my most favourite things to read and it is what keeps me motivated to keep on writing. If you have any suggestions or anything at all that comes to mind, even if it is like 2 words, please let me know!  
> I hope you enjoy this chapter, this is where the fun begins (for me anyways...).

In order for a reaction to occur the activation energy must be reached. It doesn’t necessarily mean all the particles are stagnant; just that the collisions are not being successful. And that was how the seven boys were getting along; there was troubles and pain in all their lives, but just not enough for a full blown reaction to occur.

Hoseok pushed open the door to the studio, his hands were still clammy and his forehead had beads of perspiration from his last dance class of the evening. He saw the sight that had become familiar to him, Yoongi sat at his desk, staring at all three of his computers, Hoseok never knew exactly which one Yoongi had his eyes on, not from where he was standing. Hoseok would have beamed with a smile that could light up the entire world if Yoongi turned around to greet him, just the swivel of his chair would have been enough to get rid of all of Hoseok’s tiredness, but unfortunately that did not happen often.

The dancer glided across the small distance from the door to the desk and kissed Yoongi’s forehead. The slow smile one Yoongi’s face did lighten up his mood nonetheless.

“How is the most beautiful person in the world doing today?” Hoseok said whilst turning Yoongi’s chair around so he could sit on his lap.

“I don’t know, how are you doing today?” Yoongi softly whispered, whilst staring Hoseok right in the eye.

Before Hosoek left the studio, slightly more breathless than he had entered, he wondered just how long it would have taken Yoongi to realise Hoseok was home without him having to be the first to always greet him. But he shook his head, optimism was the way Hoseok rolled, and closed the door with a smile anyways.

Namjoon rubbed at the tattoo on his wrist, when he fell in love with Jin he never expected it to cause him to go against the norm. But love made you do foolish things, and Namjoon was well aware of that.

A few years back Namjoon and Jin both had visited a theme park and the only reason why Jin had not said no to every single one of the rides was because he had too big of a pride. Namjoon was sweating more than he liked to admit, he glanced at Jin who was confidently striding across the narrow lanes between the rides, and Namjoon knew as well as Jin that this was all a façade. But Namjoon’s heart still beat a little too fast upon the sight of the man in front of him, it had taken him a very long time to obtain Jin, but the fight was all worth it.

Namjoon wanted to test how far Jin’s fake confidence would last so he grabbed Jin’s hand, and dragged him to the haunted house. The black and white building was not as uninviting as Namjoon had expected it to be; normally rides such as these did not intrigue Namjoon but for Jin he was willing to try anything. The orange printed letters told you in plain words what was inside, even if the architecture of the building did disappoint you. At the first unannounced scream in the ride, Jin screamed ten times louder, he clung to Namjoon’s upper arm, his head buried into Namjoon’s side. The latter threw his head back and laughed, he had gotten what he had wanted from this ride and was now well contained. It was not haunted houses at theme parks that actually haunted this pair, the house that actually came frequently to their mind to wake them up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat was a their own one because it was here that they had performed their ceremony, and here were it had left them both with empty wrists.

But they had both accepted what fate had written for them, they would just enjoy the days they had with each other and love each other unconditionally until something happened, because what else was there to do?

Jungkook stood leaning against the counter of the kitchen, he didn’t realise he was staring at the bedroom door of Jimin and Taehyung until Jimin opened it. His hair was a bigger mess than the kitchen had been when Jungkook had let himself in. Jimin had one of his eyes slightly open and the other was fully closed. He looked around the room and when his eyes rested on Jungkook staring at him, he leaned against the doorframe and smiled in a shy way. There was no such feeling s of butterflies in Jungkook’s stomach, Jimin made him feel worse than that. Jungkook felt as if he had no stomach at all, he felt like he was two halves, one from his head to his chest and the other from his hips to his feet. Jungkook cursed his fate for showing him such wonders of the world without him being able to obtain them.

“Good morning,” Jimin said in his husky sleepy voice, he sounded more like Taehyung in the morning than he did any other time of the day. Jimin tried to not notice the look in Jungkook’s eye, Jungkook was probably hungry from his gym session. He cracked his neck and back, it was an old habit of his that Taehyung hated but Jimin could not let go of.

“Why are you standing there without having your mouth full of food? What’s wrong Jungkook, are you feeling okay?” Jimin joked as he walked into the kitchen; Jungkook had turned around and was now going through their extremely empty cupboards.

“Taehyung and I were arguing over what was the right pronunciation of pecan last night and ended up skipping our grocery shopping.” Jimin said whilst giving an angry look to the toast he was currently making for Taehyung.

“How the hell do you miss grocery shopping over such a small thing? Surely you could have just argued whilst driving and shopping hyung,” Jungkook said in a matter of fact tone, he sometimes did not understand the logic of his older hyungs.

“Well if he just agreed with me then we could have gone shopping, but he sat there crossed legged on the floor in the living room and did not budge no matter how many times I told him I was right,” Jimin was slapping the strawberry jam in patches across the toast rather than evenly spreading it, ‘that’s what you get for not agreeing with me, you fool” thought Jimin.

“Hyung, I don’t really know much about arguments in couples but as a person of sound rationality I can assure you one of you was meant to compromise last night,” Jungkook tried to keep voice neutral,  the last thing he wanted was for Jimin to know how much he wished for baseless arguments, that he would go without food for a week if it meant getting to sit on the sofa and argue about stupid things with Taehyung, to see him talk in a pout and shake his head like a little child. What he would do to sit down in front him, hold his face in his hands and kiss his cheek when things got too heated. Or how he could uncross Taehyung’s legs and push him against the sofa, and kiss him lightly at first and then-

“Jungkook! The sink is overflowing! You know we haven’t fixed it yet Kookie, it gets blocked easily if you don’t keep an eye on it,” Jimin shook his head and put his hand on Jungkook’s hips, and slid the latter a few inches to the left so he could attend to the sink.

It had not taken a very long time for Jungkook to put the last incident that had occurred in this house of his mind and to start visiting Jimin and Taehyung again. Jungkook knew there was not much he could do about the feelings he had for the pair, but he was not going to let them cloud the beautiful friendship the trio had.

Jimin knew he was going to have a tough time waking Taehyung up today, firstly because Taehyung had to attend a blood test before he went to work and secondly because Taehyung’s nightmares had been getting worse, both the pair had been getting handful of sleep each night before Taehyung screamed them both into awakening. Jimin put his hand in the sink and reached for the cutlery in the sink first, he believed you ought to always wash the sharpest items first; it would diminish the chance of hurting yourself if you followed this simple rule. ‘If only we would deal with life in this cautious way’ Jimin thought as he reached to get the two knives from the bottom of the murky water.

“Taeyeon hyung has not been coming to the gym for the past few days, how is he doing?” Jungkook asked to distract himself; the person in question was even more aloof than Jungkook himself and barely spoke to anyone or else Jungkook would have called him to ask him about his whereabouts.

“Taeyeon has not been feeling all too well lately, his condition has been worsening for the past few weeks. Taehyung has a blood test today; they hope to do tests on his blood to compare it to Taeyeon’s.” Jimin not for once thought anything seriously bad would happen to Taeyeon, because if he thought about that his heart would stop, he did not want to know a world without Taeyeon.

These seven boys would have continued in this way, all hurting in some way but all being thankful for what they did have in their lives. If only Jungkook had not seen Taehyung’s marked wrist, under the accusing glare of the streetlamps, whilst the duo were taking a shortcut home. If only the protective barrier over Taehyung’s wrist had not gotten caught upon the barbed wires of the school walls, they could have all continued to live their lives in the lull that they had grown used to. Jungkook’s discovery was the activation energy that was needed for the long waited reaction to finally occur.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to post the next chapter very soon, in two or three days hopefully! Please anticipate it,
> 
> Love,  
> Ruzina


	12. Gut Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry it took me a whole week to post, your girl was in Scotland on a road trip with worse internet connection than your local libraries.  
> Also, I return to University from tomorrow onward so I'll be back into routine with my life and thus my posting...one can only hope!  
> Now enjoy some Vminkook :)

The night had a chill to it that was unexplainable for this time of the year, so neither Taehyung nor Jungkook had much clothing on, they were both supporting the whole t-shirt tucked into jeans look and didn’t care for any of Jimin’s warning before leaving the house. If only Taehyung had worn the jumper Jimin had bought to the front door, maybe he could have saved the disaster that was about to occur for a future time, but unfortunately he had not.

Jungkook darted his eyes to the mark that he was well used to seeing on people all around him, but Taehyung’s mark made the blood in his veins freeze, there wasn’t enough oxygen reaching his cells and there was not much he could do but admit that in some small part of his brain he had a sand grains worth of hope that Jimin and Taehyung were not soulmate. He did not even know until this moment that he had such a hope in him, it was only after the small ember in the fireplace that was his heart was crushed and turned to dust that he realised such a small glimmer of a dream existed in him.

Jungkook searched in his brain for the will to form words, it seemed like the task of forming sentences had left him altogether, “Hyung, you have performed the ceremony,” his words came as a stammer, with long pauses in between each word.

Taehyung looked at his own wrist and saw his most beloved possession, the shape of Jimin’s heart etched into his wrist. He could feel Jimin’s slow heartbeat right now; Jimin had fallen asleep whilst sitting in front of his laptop. He wished he could have been there to take the laptop from his lap and to place it on the bedside table next to Jimin’s sleeping head. But Taehyung knew Jimin would wake up in a startle and rub his eyes; he could see it all so clearly in his head. Jimin would then take the water from next to him and sprinkle some onto his eyes and then continue working as if he had not just taken a twenty minute power nap.

“You must have performed it quite recently since you have not told us lot about it, I cannot believe you two have gone through with it! I am so happy for you two,” Taehyung being phased out had given Jungkook enough time to recover; he hugged Taehyung and patted his butt in order to congratulate for the happiness of his two hyungs.

Jungkook was in love with both of his hyungs, that was one truth, but the bigger truth was that these two boys meant to him more than words could describe. His happiness was always in his hyungs, he felt his six hyung’s pain more than he experienced his own. He had cried more for his hyungs than he had ever cried for his own sufferings. Thus, knowing that two of his hyungs, whom everyone knew to be soulmates even without their marks, had officially gone through the ceremony was something that made him feel relieved on their behalf.

Jungkook did not know why Taehyung’s face had run out of its all colour. He blamed the icy air that was threatening to tear away the skin from their bones, ‘we ought to get home before hyung freezes to death’, Jungkook thought. 

But he could not help but grab Taehyung's right hand,“I mean we all knew from the day we met you both that you two are soulmates but it’s beautiful seeing Jimin hyung’s heart stamped on your wrist hyung, I bet you never stop looking at it! I know I would not!” Jungkook was speaking his mind; no one in the world would ever doubt Jimin and Taehyung’s relationship.

“Jimin,” Taehyung looked like a lost puppy to Jungkook whilst he said this, but to Taehyung himself he felt even worse than just being lost, he just wanted to go home and get to Jimin, but they were both the same thing for him anyways.

“Well duh, of course it is Jimin hyung’s mark, even if you asked a toddler they would say you two are soulmates. When I met you two in the early days I always thought you had a string that attached the two of you, no matter what the crowd was like or where we were, the two of you always diverted towards one another. The way you two moved in sync haunted me for days; it took me weeks to get used to it. You know hyung, me and Namjoon hyung once had a full blown conversation about how sometimes we barely understood you two, you both speak half the words of a sentence and then leave it and know what you talking about, try listening to one of your conversations and you will see wh-“

“Please stop, I need to go to Jimin,” Taehuyng had hoped Jungkook would stop talking, but it felt like the younger boy was going to go on forever. He knew Jungkook meant well, he was trying to compliment the two of them on how much certainly there was in their being soulmate, because that was how Jimin and Taehyung had felt before the ceremony. What the maknae did not know was how much each of his words of his was like a stab in his heart, if only Jungkook knew the pain Taehyung was in he would have stopped talking a while back.

“Hyung, are you okay? What happened hyung? “ Jungkook knew something was completely off. The Taehyung hyung that knew would have shoved the mark under everyone’s nose the moment he had gotten it. He would have cutely bounced from one friend to the next, his boxy grin displayed for the world to see. Taehyung would have wrapped his arms around Jimin from the back and kissed him on his cheek, the two of them would have acted like they were drunk in love to which the reaction of the rest would be to say in unison “go get a room!” Which would then make both of them giggle like kids.

“Let’s go home Jungkook, please” Taehyung managed, he did not know what to say to Jungkook, he had no idea how much was too much to reveal. All Taehyung knew was that he could not say a word more without talking to Jimin, he could not go through this alone. Just being in the same room as Jimin would take away most of the anxiety that knotted his stomach like a badly tied pairs of shoe laces. The soft look in Jimin’s eyes would manage to take away all the thoughts that were buzzing in his head as if someone had let loose a handful of flies inside of his mind.

When they were 11 years old Taehyung had once been invited to a birthday party of one of the boys from his after school music club. Taehyung, Jimin and Taeyeon were envied by most for the beautiful relationship that the three shared, but everyone was especially jealous of just how friendly Taehyung was; he had half the school as his friends and was loved by younger and older kids alike.  Jealousy is described often as the green monster because it makes you do ruthless things, and that was how Taehyung felt when he realised after 3 hours that the boy had not wanted him to attend the birthday party at all, the birthday gift he dumped into the black city centre bin that you find littered everywhere. When Taehyung had returned home and into his room he found Jimin sat on his bed, feet dangling and his arms outstretched.

“I felt like something bad was going to happen, so I came here to comfort myself,” Jimin had whispered whilst Taehyung sank into Jimin's hug. It was not just marked soulmates that felt each other’s unease, because genuine love was enough to make you feel anxiety on behalf of the people you truly cared for.

If someone moved all of the furniture in a room by just a few inches the occupant of the house would feel unease, but unless told of what had occurred, they would be unable to explain why they felt the uncomfortableness that they felt. And that was exactly what Jimin was going through right now; he knew something was amiss but he could not put his finger to it. So he paced his room, pretending to be thinking about the bullet points for the case study he was meant to be writing on a patient he had monitored in his last placement.

Jungkook pushed open the door and was about to walk in when he felt Taehyung walk past him with a confidence in his stride that he had lacked all the way home. Jimin was standing in the middle of the bedroom with the door open, as if he had expected Taehyung to march in the way he had. ‘These two seriously creep me out,’ Jungkook thought, whilst he closed the door behind him.

Jimin did not even see Taehyung’s bare wrist; he took one glance at the latter and said, “Jungkook, kitchen now.” There was so much authority in Jimin’s voice that Jungkook walked diagonally across the living room to the kitchen without a second glance at the pair.

Taehyung lifted his arm to show Jimin the reason for why his face had turned into an ashy grey colour, “Jimin-ah, I have a bad feeling about Jungkook finding out.”

And he was right to be feeling that way.


	13. Sparks From Burning Embers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's three chapter's edited down to one, we're getting straight to the point with this one.
> 
> Please leave a comment at the end as to what you think Vmin's reaction will be in the next chapter, I really want to know how you think the story will go from here,
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina

For Jungkook’s 17th Birthday his six hyungs thought it would be a great idea to prank him. It ended in tears of frustration. The birthday boy was led to believe that he had managed to ruin his own birthday. Firstly, because of a carefully placed piece of Lego Jungkook had tripped causing him to land on his own birthday cake. The next morning all 7 boys were meant to leave for bowling but due to some strategic misplacement of Jungkook’s phone, his hyungs made him think that he had woken up late and managed to get their reservation cancelled.

“Jungkook, it’s like you don’t want us to celebrate your birthday,” Namjoon had said with pretence anger that Jungkook could not see past because his mind was cloudy from the anger he already felt at himself.

Yoongi looked slightly away before he said, “If you cannot make even the slightest effort for your own birthday then no matter how hard we try, we can’t make it special,” he breathed a sigh of relief, that he had delivered his lines well, which Jungkook mistook for frustration.

“We may as well leave,” Taehyung had said whilst standing up.

They had all walked out of the living room one by one, which gave the newly turned 17 year old enough time to build up his frustration to such a level that he had kicked the sofa in agony.

That was the type of aggravation that Jungkook felt right now after Jimin revealed to him his unmarked wrist. Jungkook could not form any sort of conclusion as to what was going on. In his 21 years of living he had never encountered such an occurrence; where one soulmate had a mark and one did not. All that Jungkook was familiar to was thrown out of the window.

“You must be pulling my leg,” the latter had said, resting his head back onto his chair and looking up at the two boys leaning against the kitchen counter.

“Because we have no better things to do than joke about something so important to us, of course,” the sarcasm in Jimin’s voice was so sharp it could have cut through ice.

It is not easy accepting something that you have never encountered nor heard about. Jungkook only knew of two scenarios; you were either fated to be soulmates or you were not. There never was a middle ground, “I want to hit my head against a wall,” Jungkook said out loud without meaning to.

“You have four choices, personally I prefer the wall to your left, it has a nice bang to it,” the grin on Taehyung’s face was one that Jungkook was unfamiliar with, it was so bitter that the younger boy felt like he could not look at it for too long, or else he would suffocate.

“I feel like the table is the best option, you hurt your neck as well as your forehead so that’s a bonus way to relieve yourself of the anger you feel,” Jimin suggested.

In the years that Jungkook had been friends with the pair, he had never encountered them to have such a personality as they were portraying today. Their secret of the past year and a half had not only caused them to have bangs under their eyes from sleepless nights, but had changed their mentalities too. From the happy-go-lucky pair that lit up the room with their vibrant traits, Jungkook was seeing their unmasked selves that they had become since they had performed the ceremony. It was heart-breaking.

Jungkook felt a pain in his chest that was different to the one he normally felt when he was with the pair. He had grown used to feeling sorry for himself; he was used to feeling like he was being buried under hot sand every time he laid his eyes on couple because they had a relationship that he envied. However, at this moment in time he tried very hard not to imagine how the past year and a half had been for these two hyungs, having kept this burden on their shoulders all along.

“Why have you kept this from me hyung, from all of us?”

The silence lingered, both boys leaning against the counter lowered their eyes in synchrony.  How were they to tell Jungkook that even after such a long time they both hoped that a miracle would occur? Everyone would only call them fools for still clinging onto such a thin piece of hope, but it was all they had to keep them alive.

“We are trying to see if there are others like us, why cause all of you lot pain if one day we can find a solution to this?” Jimin said in a matter of fact tone.

“I thought I was your best friend, neither of you let me keep any of my troubles to myself, but you have let such a big secret eat away at you both for such a long time and not thought of sharing it with me? Okay, forget me, what about the hyungs? They could have offered advice or even helped you with your findings,” Jungkook wondered in how many ways he was going to feel pain today, it felt like a never ending road that was getting tired of travelling on. ‘Am I so unworthy of their trust?’ Jungkook thought and regretted it almost instantly; he was already suffering enough without his negative thoughts also putting in their pennies worth.

“Jungkook, it’s not that, we just did not want to cause unwanted stress and pain to you guys, this is our problem and there was no point dragging the rest of you into the hellhole that the two of us have been living in for the past couple of months,” Taehyung was scratching at a mark on the kitchen counter whilst he said this, Jimin instinctively rested his hand on the latter’s to stop him from hurting his nails against the harshness of the cheap counter’s surface.

“It makes no sense, it’s either that both of you had each other’s mark or you both had different soulmates,” both of the boys in question stopped breathing at the last words but Jungkook failed to notice, “how can one of you be marked and the other unmarked? I am all confusion, my brain hurts just thinking about it,” Jungkook’s hands clasped the sides of his head; he wanted to stop thinking about all this.

“Join the club mate,” Taehyung’s said with a smile so sour that it could curdle milk in a few seconds.

“I’m going to go now, I don’t think I can take this anymore,” Jungkook got up from the seat that had held him steady all this while, he felt lightheaded but he knew he needed fresh air or else he’d explode with all of the emotions he was currently experiencing. It was like getting on a theme park ride that you thought you knew the rhythm of just to be thrown off completely by it.

“I am happy that you can just walk out of this so easily, we have to live through it,” for the first time during the night, Jimin’s voice could not hide the utter sadness that he was experiencing. Jungkook was taking a step forward towards Jimin but Taehyung got there first, he held Jimin in such a way that it looked like he was protecting him from Jungkook.

* * *

 

Hoseok sat in his car, alone, for a very long while before he started the engine. The street was empty save for a black cat he saw strolling leisurely under the streetlights, ‘Yoongi wants to be born as a cat in his next life, I hope I get reincarnated as a laser light, at least then he’d be running after me without getting bored after a while’ he thought with a bittersweet smile on his face.

He remembered how long it had taken for him to take the hints that Yoongi was throwing him before they officially started going out. The latter had asked Hoseok to at least a dozen dates and had managed to take him out to half of them without Hoseok even realising they were on dates. Yoongi had not really ran after anything in his life, but seeing the dancer in his element, with a more vibrant personality than that of a 3 year-old’s, he had been attracted to him like students to August’s back to school deals.

‘Am I so easy to get bored of?’ Hoseok had laid awake thinking on more than enough nights, whilst Yoongi was still downstairs at his studio, working yet again until the early mornings.

He had asked and failed on another evening to get Yoongi away from his studio, so he drove without realising where he was headed to Jimin and Taehyung[‘s house, it was where he found his comfort, in old memories of shared laughter with two people that were so like himself. But he saw from the empty parking spot that they were not home.

And that was why when Jungkook knocked on Jin and Namjoon’s door, Hoseok came to greet him. He had a unicorn headband that newly arrived recognised to be Kim Yoon-ah’s, he must have forgotten to take it off after playing with the five year old.

Jungkook closed the door behind him, and followed the older boy into the house, “You look cute hyung, that headband really suits you.”

“Why did you have to tell him? Now I’ll have to take Kim Yoon-ah to school tomorrow morning even though it’s Namjoon’s turn,” Jin sighed as he sunk deeper into the sofa.

“You two are so childish, I cannot believe you have a child of your own,” Hoseok took the headband off and laid it down onto the coffee table with a foolish smile.

It took Jungkook a very long time before he could bring up the topic of soulmates and their marks without being suspicious. They were watching a late night comedy show and there was yet another advert on “beautiful places to perform the most important ceremony”, Jungkook saw this opportunity and begun slowly asking questions until he got to the one he was really here to ask.

Jin flicked through the channels as he said, “Don’t be daft, there is no such a thing, you really are letting your imaginative juices flow aren’t you today?”

“Hyung, but hear me out, what if there is someone who has their soulmates mark but that person does not reciprocate it?”

“There is only one explanation that comes to my mind, there is third person involved, because-“ Namjoon’s words after that were lost to Jungkook, all he heard was a buzzing in his mind so loud that he wanted the world to stop spinning on its axis.

The small ember of hope that Jungkook had believed to have been extinguished was lit up again, as if a strong gust of wind had come to bring it to life again.

* * *

 

By the time Jungkook had reached their house again the couple had already returned from their late night drive. Jungkook let himself in, and for the second time that night he walked across the living room to the kitchen without losing any more time.

Jimin was perched on the counter; he had a jar of Nutella in one hands and a spoon in the other and was telling a half listening Taehyung about the case study he was working on for his next assignment at University. They were both clad in their pyjamas, having recently showered, and relaxing in the kitchen before heading to bed. Both had gotten so used to pretending like everything was fine that when Jungkook walked in he could not tell that these were the same boys who had spoken so bitterly just a few hours ago.

Jungkook blocked the light that was coming in from the living room; he had never in his wildest dream ever imagined he was going to say the words that came out of him next.

“Hyungs, I am both of your soulmates.”


	14. Part of a Very Long Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHO HAS LANDED HERSELF A PLACEMENT IN THE ONLY CARDIOLOGY DEPARTMENT OF THE CITY WHILST WRITING A STORY ABOUT THE MALFUNCTIONS OF THE HEART? YES THAT WOULD BE ME.
> 
> Also, can I just say the comments from the last chapter blew my mind in so many ways and I am still shaken by some of them. So for this chapter, leave a comment as to what Jungkook will do next if Vmin do not accept what he has to offer them.

Jimin and Jihyun had been allowed to have a pair of fishes when Jimin was 6 years old. Jihyun at that age was too young to choose his own fish, thus Jimin, being the loving older brother that he was, had chosen for his younger sibling a clown fish. Jimin may have been little but he had observed how Jihyun loved to play with his bumblebee soft toy, and the clown fish was the closet he could match to a bumblebee fish. For himself he had chosen the breed of Neon Tetra, he liked how the fish seemed to have a shimmer to it when it swam but also because Taehyung at that time was going through a phase where he liked anything to be blue, but Jimin did not like any of the fully blue fishes, so he went for an in between fish to make both the parties happy.

A couple months had gone by where the brothers and the set of twins had grown used to new addition to the family. They were well used to the routine of looking after the fishes and sometimes even fought as to who got to give the daily feed. Therefore, on a morning like all the rest, when Jimin saw his fish lose all of its shimmer and float at the top, he pretended to not notice. Taehyung had made the rest of the two boys read as many books suitable for 6 year olds as he could muster on the topic of looking after fishes, thus Jimin knew exactly what a deceased fish looked like, but he did not want to think about what the reality was, so he left all the pain boxed up in a little corner in his mind until Taehyung and Taeyeon was ready to join him after school. The three stood, fixated by the glass case that used to hold the reason for so many of their fights, no longer alive. Even Jihyun’s bumblebee, as they called the fish, seemed ill, because of course it had also lost a companion. With no particular words spoken between the three, they had decided that they would ignore the fact that was staring at them, quite literally, and pretend Jimin’s fish was still alive.

And thus, in a similar fashion, both the now 22 year olds decided that they would not register what Jungkook had just uttered, because they knew it would bring more pain than they could handle at this point in their life.

Jimin and Taehyung looked in the direction of the recent addition to the kitchen. Because of Jungkook’s cough whilst entering they knew he was in the house; however until his last words they did not think he needed any special attention.

“Jungkook you need sleep, the blanket is tucked in the corner of the sofa,” Taehyung said not really acknowledging what had been said by the younger boy.

“Both of us apologise to you for being so inconsiderate earlier on, we hold no bitterness towards you Kookie, it’s just that you were the first person to find out about us and all of our pain and anger was just unleashed unto you. As hyungs we ought to have been less selfish. As for now please get some sleep, it’s very late already,” Jimin said with a sweeter smile than the Nutella jar that he still held in his hand.

They both returned to their conversation as if Jungkook was not still standing there, in the arch of the door, with his anger bubbling up to a degree he knew he could not hide.

“No,” that was all that Jungkook could muster. ‘Why can they not take me seriously? I am just a few years younger than them and they treat me like a child,’ his hands formed such tight fists that his knuckles became as white as a child who has not been getting enough oxygen into their system.

With a confused look Jimin asked, “What ‘no’, Jungkook-ssi?”

“I know I am the youngest and in most discussions I do not participate but this particular topic concerns my happiness, so you will have to listen to me,” Jungkook was not used to demanding for attention, but what else could he do when his hyungs were not responding in the way he had wanted them to respond.

“Jungkook you have no idea what you are talking about, the topic of soulmates is a sensitive one and you know it,” Taehyung managed, he did not want to acknowledge the fact that he had heard what Jungkook had said because it was too wild of concept to get his head around it.

“So why does me being your soulmates make it any less sensitive?” Jungkook tried to keep the fact that he was heavily insulted out of his voice.

“Because you are not our soulmates,” Jimin answered. ‘Where is Jungkook coming with such ideas from? We should not have let him run off like that, me and Taehyung are becoming more irresponsible as days go by,’ was all that Jimin could think of.

“There is no way you can say that with that much confidence, why else do you think you don’t bare the mark like Taehyung hyung does? It’s because the three of us are meant to be together. If you two were meant to be soulmates then wouldn’t the ceremony have been successful? All the evidence points to me being your soulmate, why else are we in a group of seven where four of the friends have already found their partners? Everything is to do with fate, so don’t you think the three of us are fated to be? Taehyung hyung, you know Jimin hyung is not your soulmate which means he must have another person as his, and out of all of us, I am the only one without a mark.”

  
“Jungkook you can’t just make snap decisions about who you want as your soulmate, that’s not how it works.” Taehyung’s voice was all ice.

  
Jungkook did not know if now was the right time to confess his love for his hyungs, they were both angry and neither wanted to hear what Jungkook was about to say. However, Jungkook knew he needed to convince the couple that what he was saying did not just spurt out of the revelation of Taehyung’s mark, but that this had been brewing in his mind for months now. And thus Jungkook said with as maturity as he could muster, “I am in love with you both.”

“Of course you are, we love you too Jungkook and you know that, you’re our closest friend, we’d die for you, both of us,” Taehyung exclaimed without a minute’s hesitation. He smiled at how foolish Jungkook was being today, ‘why would he not be in love with us? We are practically his family,’ he thought, knowing full well that a similar thought was going through his soulmate’s mind right now too.

“No, I am IN love with you both, as in romantically” Jungkook thought ‘I can’t get any more clear than that’, he knew it was a risk being so blunt but if he wasn’t going to stand up for himself today than when will he ever? Jungkook won all races he’d ever competed in school, there was never a time when he saw the finish line and didn’t think that it was anyone else’s but his own. In that same way he knew what was his today and he was going to achieve it, no matter how frank he had to be to get it.

Normally at such a thing both the listeners would have laughed, but the look in Jungkook’s eye killed any laughter that would have otherwise been born. “That’s not right,” Jimin and Taehyung said simultaneously. And in a similar manner, on an average day they would have made eye contact after saying the same thing at the same time, or even high fived, but today was not the day.

This was as wrong as snow in July or the sun rising from the west. Jimin and Taehyung felt as if someone had told them that the new week would have 8 days rather than 7 or that autumn leaves would now raise up towards the sky rather than fall down to the ground. They both felt like they had worn their shoes the wrong way around, the uncomfortableness they were experiencing was something entirely unlike any they had ever experienced until just then.

“I say this with all due respect, but you cannot decide my feelings for me hyungs,” this time it was Jungkook’s turn to be bitter, the anger in his blood was slowly being exchanged for that of resentment, resentment at the reaction of the two people whom he now believed had a duty to love him back, why should they not? They were his soulmates after all.

“We know you like the back of our hands, how would we have not noticed such a huge change in the way you felt for us?” Taehyung moved from his chair towards Jimin, he felt a sudden urge to be comforted. His mind was swarming with questions he wanted answers to, but could not form coherent sentences to ask.  
  
Taehyung tried to meet Jimin’s eyes but Jimin was no longer in the room. The latter’s eyes were glazed over with recollection. All the moments he had seen Jungkook look at him with a stare that held more than just general friendliness, it was just hitting Jimin the name for that type of a look; lust. Jimin shivered as he remembered all the times Jungkook’s hand had lingered at his waist, he had always thought that it was a habit of Jungkook’s and he did not know how intimate of an action it was since he had never really had many long term relationships.

Jimin swallowed the taste of bile as he remembered on many a times when both Jungkook and Taehyung had gotten drunk before himself; they were both lightweight, and Jungkook had been a bit too close to Taehyung or when in a slurred voice he had made comments of what he would like to try with Taehyung. Until now he had put it all to alcohol but now he was not quite so sure. Or the times when Jungkook would come and sit right in between the two when they were all out drinking, Jimin had thought it was because Jungkook was just being the maknae and wanting attention, but now his fingers dug into his hands as the jigsaw pieces flew slowly into their right places.

“Because you two have never had to search for the one to love, since you knew the meaning of love you had always put it to each other and known no other exception,” even Jungkook was surprised at what he had just said out loud, this must have been the first rational sentence he had spoken in a long while.

Taehyung leaned against the kitchen counter, he felt Jimin’s hand on his shoulders and only then realised how much tension he had been holding up in them. His hand instinctively went to Jimin’s and he squeezed it, to reassure himself more than to reassure his lover.

“Is that the reason why you have stopped sleeping over at ours?” This was the one question that had the least amount of pain attached to it, so Jimin chose to ask it to end the silence that was threatening to swallow all three of them.

“Yes, that is why. Neither of you will ever understand how painful it is to love two boys who are already perfect for each other. Nor will you understand the agony of being seen as a best friend when you want something greater, something so much more. You both have always loved each other equally so you will not be able to imagine what it feels like to love without receiving the same love back, it’s like putting all of your savings into a vending machine and all of the chocolate bars always getting stuck between you and the glass wall. Do you know how many nights I have cried myself to sleep knowing that I was never going to be able to good enough for either of you?” Jungkook felt like a broken tap, his words were like gushing water and there was no easy way of stopping himself from saying all that had been haunting him for so long.

There were no words in all the languages that Jimin and Taehyung knew that would have allowed either to answer such a question. So once again they let their newly made friend answer for them; silence.

“I come over every morning to your house so I can pretend that I live with you both without feeling the pain of knowing you both are in the next room, sleeping in each other’s arms. I pretend I have not gone clothes shopping each season so I could wear your clothes and pretend we share them like you both do so naturally. I have more than enough income coming in to allow myself to live a lavish lifestyle eating whatever I want but I barely ever go grocery shopping so I can come over here and feel like this is kitchen I truly belong in. I have been creating a world where I am a part of your relationship without you ever knowing.”

All of Jungkook’s words were being heard and felt by his hyungs, but it was not easy to include an extra person, so suddenly, when you had already created a perfect future involving only the two of you. Jimin and Taehyung both wondered if the feeling of empathy had left them, since no matter what Jungkook said, neither could accept the love the maknae was offering.

Taehyung leaned his head backwards onto Jimin’s chest, and conveyed through that small action of his the thought that was repeating itself in his mind, ‘this is going to be one long night Jimin-ah.’ 


	15. Anatomy Gone Wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know how I said I like writing in one sitting? Well if I was to do that at this point in my life I'd have to update next after I graduated!!!  
> Life is has become very overwhelming in a very short span of time for me and I am using this story as an escape so I just want to thank you all once again for taking the time out of your busy lives to read it.  
> I've added horizontal lines with regards to flashbacks, as of you lovely readers suggested that so if you have anything else you'd want me to change let me know!  
> Comment below as to who you think is suffering more; Jimin, Taehyung or Jungkook at this point in their lives, I really want to know what you guys think,
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina

“Give us a bit more time,” Jimin started, his voice came from a distant, and he was speaking without really hearing himself.

“This is a lot for us to take in,” Taehyung continued.

“We cannot-“

“-decide our feelings so easily Jungkook, you must understand us…”

“… we have known each other since we wear four years old and you are right, we have loved each other from the moment the word made any sense to us-“

“-you have known you love us for a while, but for us it’s all new and just a lot process,”

“With our culture and what we have been bought up with, the idea of a three way soulmate relationship is just a bit too surreal. We have all heard those rare stories of platonic soulmates, with separate lovers, but even that involves four people,”

“Let’s go to sleep, tonight has been very long already,” Taehyung finished off.

Jimin jumped off easily from the counter and crossed the small distance between him and Jungkook. He ruffled his hair and smiled, ‘the three of us have gone through a lot already, and this isn’t going to be any different’ he thought to himself.

Jungkook and Taehyung turned simultaneously away from each other, the former towards the living room and the latter towards the sink.

Taehyung’s hands held onto the edge of the counter whilst the whole content of his stomach threatened to reappear back into the world. He could taste the bile rising up as he retched into the kitchen sink.

‘How was I so blind?’ Was all that he could think of besides the pain he felt in his throat, his mind was whirling and the onset of this reaction had been the look in Jungkook’s eyes whilst Jimin had been ruffling his hair, Taehyung had seen that look countless of times but now that he knew the intention behind it he could do nothing but want to erase it from his mind.

Growing up it was natural for both Jimin and Taehyung to have gotten jealous of each other, no relationship truly ever exists without that the green monster saying hello once in a while. However, Jimin was the one who most frequently felt this particular emotion, it was hard not to with Taehyung being on such friendly terms with literally everyone they knew.

* * *

  
On a rare occasion when Jimin did not have his dance practice after school he had gone to wait for Taehyung after the latter’s music club. Taehyung had been in there for more than thirty minutes extra with Jimin waiting with butterflies in his stomach for his boyfriend to make an appearance. Irrespective how long they had been together, Jimin and Taehyung found it impossible to get bored of each other no matter what. It was October, with the leaves on the trees threatening each day to fall onto the ground but lasting a day longer just to tease the passer-by. As no one was around, Jimin let the childish side take over him and he jumped around the puddles of leaves for the satisfying sound of it crushing beneath him. He picked up a leaf that looked like it had an image of a tiger on it to show to Taehyung, nothing made Taehyung happier than tigers in places they were not expected. He placed the leaf in his pocket, reminding himself to be gentle so as not to crush the faint outline of the animal on it.

When Taehyung did exit the small building which had kept him apart from his lover, he made the mistake of not noticing how Jimin stood a few feet away, as he was too busy saying goodbye to a friend of his. The bigger mistake was that the words “I love you too” had slipped like coins from a torn pocket. And that was why Jimin had gotten onto his bike without a word and started riding away from the building, making sure Taehyung could follow easily at first before putting all his effort on the pedals of the bike and speeding away.

“Jimin-ah! Why are you being so irresponsible on the road all of a sudden? You could get us killed!” A desperate Taehyung shouted as Jimin increased his speed as each passing street went by. The poor follower was out of breath and ready to collapse by the time they got to the empty basketball court that they frequented whenever they could.

Jimin crashed onto the middle of the court, took a physics book out and aggressively began reading. His cheeks were flushed, both from feeling like he wanted to punch Taehyung and from the bike ride they had both completed.

Taehyung was exhausted but he rode in circles around Jimin shouting absurd cheesy lines at him until, after a very very long time, Jimin’s face broke into a smile like a glow stick being snapped in two.

It did not take long before Taehyung was pinned onto the floor of the basketball court, feeling the harshness of the grit against his body as Jimin kissed him with so much force that Taehyung thought there would blood alongside the sweetness of Jimin’s mouth to taste if Jimin did not stop, but he was willing to become a vampire if it meant Jimin was going to be this passionate towards him. And it was between harsh kisses and gasps of breath that Taehyung learnt not to say I love you without really meaning it.

Jimin smiled on his way into the house as he felt the leaf in his pocket crushed to dust.

* * *

 

All of that had changed very abruptly after the night of the ceremony; it was as if jealousy was a seed that grew better in the conditions that Jimin’s mind had provided until the point of the ceremony, where it was plucked out and embedded in to Taehyung’s mind. Since then Taehyung always stayed close to Jimin on the dance floor, made sure he checked Jimin’s heartbeat on the arrival of a good looking stranger in any room and eyed every new person with suspicion of being Jimin’s soulmate. So you can imagine the trauma he felt when Jungkook claimed that he was the person Taehyung had been on the lookout for a long, right under his nose.

“You know what Jimin? I always thought you’d find your soulmate after I’d passed away, someone who’d console you for the loss of your lover to a point where you finally fell in love with them too. I thought they’d be a stranger, coming from a faraway land to take away all of your pain after you’d lost me. I never thought you’d find him whilst we were so young or that he’d be our closest friend.”

Jimin did not know what to say, so he let his overly fast heartbeat relay the message of the shock that he felt at his life partner’s words.

Taehyung and Jimin sat on the floor, with their backs leaning against their bed, facing the moonless sky. They were enveloped into a sea of darkness, only knowing out of habit and memory what the other’s face must have looked like when the words came crashing through.

Their shoulders were pressed into each other, and suddenly Taehyung felt smaller than normal to Jimin, his heart sank as he felt his lover draw his knees to his chest, trying hard to protect himself from the torment that the world kept throwing at the pair.

Taehyung sighed, “I did not know if I would be able to take the pain of you finding your soulmate whilst I was still alive. And to be frank I don’t think I can.”

“He is not my soulmate, I know he thinks he is, but do you ever think about me?”

“The biggest problem is I never stop thinking about you,”

“Taehyung, believe me, I have never felt anything for him out of the ordinary, he’s our best friend and our maknae. Don’t you think I would have known if he was my soulmate in all the years I’ve known him?”

“You’re forgetting all the people that perform the ceremony before falling in love Jimin-sii,” his words were like ice being poured onto Jimin’s skin, it was burning him alive.

The skin is the largest organ of the body, it has many functions, one of the primary one being that of protection; the skin provides protection from mechanical impacts and pressure, variations in temperature, micro-organisms, radiation and chemicals. Jimin knew this off by heart, but he wondered, ‘Why does it not also protect us against words that cause greater wounds than any of the above combined?’ The idea of Taehyung believing he would fall in love with someone else was a causing a bigger laceration in Jimin than he could ever dress, no matter how many years of practice he got at his hospital placements.

Neither of the boys would have been able to tell you who’s tear was the one to land first onto their laps, with their knees pressed into each other’s, forehead leaning together and noses brushing.

The room felt like it was empty of oxygen, the concentration gradient that is normally very steep between the alveolus and the blood capillaries seemed to have been cut in half, and breathing for either was more painful than they could explain.

The pair only realised that they had fallen asleep, in each other’s embrace on the floor, when Taehyung woke up screaming from his nightmare, and Taehyung lay rigid in Jimin’s arms wondering how many more nights it would take before it became a reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell I have an anatomy and physiology exam coming up in two days from this chapter? XD


	16. Everything is Mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is based around: "Yours is mine, mine is mine, everything is mine"- Jungkook, Burn The Stage. 
> 
> (Imagine Jimin in burn the stage whilst reading his book in the hotel room...sorry not sorry for all the feels.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's currently 05:12 in the morning and I started editing this chapter at midnight... I am literally more stubborn than Jungkook in this chapter to post tonight because the stress of not posting is killing me alive. 
> 
> As per requested this chapter is the longest one I've written so please excuse any mistakes, I am partially blinded right now from the glare of my laptop screen from the past few hours, 
> 
> i have been talking to a lot of you on twitter and I am the happiest girl ever to be on the receiving end of all the love you guys have shown me, and to all those whom i could not personally thank for reading this I will do it here: Thank you for taking the time out of your busy lives to read this, it means the world to me,
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina

“Tell me about unrequited love,” Jungkook sat with his head back, trying to give the air of someone who really didn’t care for the answer. 

 Namjoon spluttered his tea out, staining the papers in front of him. 

 “Wow dude, what a way to say hi.” 

 “Take your time, I’ve got all day.” 

 “Can I please drink my tea in peace without you asking such things so out of the blue? Who hurt you Jeon Jungkook?” 

 “No one, I just want to know how it feels,” 

 “Let me tell you one thing first and foremost, even if it feels like the pain will never end, it ends and you do heal,” 

 “I don’t want to know the ending, I don’t care for it, I just want to know how you felt”

 “I think it’s very important for you to know the ending, since that is where the happy ending is,”

 “Hyung, what makes you think that I will ever get a happy ending to my life?” 

 Namjoon glanced at the boy in front of him. There was so much harshness in his words; his body looked like it was ready to attack at any given moment. His face was all sharp angles; the hand that rested on the table was in a fist, blue vines showing off. ‘He already had a difficult upbringing, now who has managed to break his heart again?’ Namjoon thought to himself.

 “Jungkook, do you really believe you’ve fallen in love? You can tell hyung about it,” 

 “It’s not about what I feel, it never is, no one ever cares about my feelings but who am I to talk.” The younger boy knew exactly what the older one would say to this, but he couldn’t stop himself from saying it nonetheless.

 “Jungkook, you know that’s a lie, all 6 of us care more about you and your wellbeing than our own, we would sacrifice anything for you,” the hyung confirmed.

 What Jungkook needed was not a sacrifice, just to be included.

 The maknae broke the silence that was starting to creep into the room, “you’ve talked about your first love to us all before, but it was always as a joke, this time I want to know about her for real.”

 “She was your average loud girl; she said the dumbest of things that at times I blushed for her.”

 “What a way to start talking about your first love hyung, I am enjoying this already,”  the maknae said as he reached for the cup of tea that Namjoon had placed on the table whilst he began talking.

 “She never sat anywhere but the fronts, laughed through the whole of the class when she was in an eccentric mood or stared at the PowerPoint with a blank gaze the rest of the time, you could never tell which one you would be greeted with. Even when it came to her fashion she was the same, one day she looked like she got dressed by a personalised stylist, my favourite was when she had her shirt tucked in with a simple pair of jeans… she had the tiniest waist. And then on other days she wore joggers and a sweatshirt that looked like she picked up from her bedroom floor. She was unpredictable and that was what made her so captivating. She always spoke up for herself; none of our male teachers could get the smallest of a sexist comment through without her butchering them first. She was TINY, but my goodness did she pack a punch.” Namjoon took a long deep breath as if the wind had been knocked out of him, it was not easy to talk about her even though it was years past since he had last seen her, the wound she had opened had healed, but it didn’t mean the scar wasn’t there.

 “In our last year together I wrote her a letter and slipped it in her bag when she was not looking, it took me literally 4 months to get the courage to do it but when I did it felt like the world had come to a stop and I don’t think I really lived those 3 days it took for her to slip the reply into the empty locker I had indicated for her,” Jungkook watched the older boy relive his agonising past that he had buried for a long while, why was he always causing other people pain, he thought.

 “Her reply was poetry, she was always good with her choice of words, it was three sides long, I laughed when I opened the envelop because that was exactly what I was expecting; she had the longest essays in our classes and could never stop talking once she got started. She wanted me to know, in the nicest way possible; at that point in her life and that there was only two things that was at the top of her priority list; her platonic relationships and her education. There was no way I was going to argue with that. So I spent the next six months of the academic year sat three seats away from her, making a mental note of every word she said because I knew that was the last I was going to hear that sequence of words strung into a sentence of that type. With every word she said it was as if a needle was being poked into me, sharp and painful; leaving an invisible mark on me that I was not going to heal from for the next 2 years.” Namjoon wanted to go on, tell Jungkook about every night he stayed up wondering where she was, what she was doing, if she thought highly of men now or if she was lying in ones arm as he lay alone with the thoughts of her, but he had to remember he was talking to his maknae, so he stopped himself.

 “How come you didn’t try to convince her otherwise? Surely, you could have shown her you were worth her time,” Jungkook was confused, if you loved someone you fought for them, you didn’t just let them slip through the net like that.

 “Jungkook, she was more stubborn than a 5 year old on Youtube when a call comes in, she was never going to listen to anyone but herself.” Namjoon laughed whilst saying this, if only Jungkook had ever properly met her he would never have said the above statement.

 “Would you have done things differently if she had been in a relationship?” Jungkook tried his best to keep his emotions out of this words, it would not do to let his hyung know where he was coming from.

 “Of course not! I would never have written her the letter in the first place,” Namjoon paused for a second, his brain was ticking faster than the clock behind him, “Jungkook you can’t go around breaking people’s relationship for your own needs.”

 The laugh that escaped from Jungkook’s mouth next made the hair on Namjoon’s arm rise. This was not a laugh he had heard coming from the maknae unless they were in an escape room plotting something dirty to get themselves out. “Oh I won’t be breaking anyone’s relationship hyung, just cracking it far enough to let me slide in.”

* * *

 

 Taehyung was put back into the real world as a sharp leaf fell from the tree above him and attacked his neck at an angle he was not anticipating. As a reflex he caught the alleged weapon of nature and was about to chuck it onto the floor until he realised that his was a product from Jimin’s favourite tree, he called it the “scrawny one” as the tree barely had any branches and was shaped like a malnourished younger sibling of the rest of the trees on their street.

 No matter whether Jimin had class that morning or not, Jimin went out every morning and took a Polaroid picture of this particular tree until there were no longer any leaves left hanging from it.

 It was only looking up and seeing that the tree was in its last phase for the coming winter, with barely any leaves left on it that Taehyung realised just how much of life the two had been missing over the past few weeks.    

 Jimin was sat on the sofa, wearing black shorts and an oversized grey hoodie that belonged to Taehyung, his legs curled up and a book clutched in his hands. Out of habit Taehyung went and kissed him deeply on the mouth, relishing in the warmth of the boy in front of him to try and block out the autumnal cold.

Taehyung undid one of Jimin’s hands from around the book and placed the content of his hands into the latter’s.

Jimin looked at his hands and then at his lover, “what is it Taehyung-ah?”

Taehyung steadied his voice and also his mind before speaking, “where is my set of pictures from the scrawny tree changing its colour this year, Jimin-ssi?”

It took a few seconds for Jimin to register the words spoken by the boy in front of him, everything took a lot longer for Jimin to understand these days, it was as if his brain was a few seconds behind reality.

“Oh,” he said simply.

Taehyung kneeled in front of Jimin and cupped the smaller boys face into his large hands.

“Save me, Jimin.”

Jimin’s blank stare made Taehyung want to crawl into a cave and never show himself to the outer world again. There was no pain in his lover’s eyes, there was only a vast amount of nothingness and he wondered if that was what was reflected in his eyes on most days.

“Jimin, please, we can’t go on living like zombies any longer, I am forgetting how to feel things.”

Jimin thought that he had learnt enough about pain in his degree so far, but no one tells you about the type of pain which leaves you so numb you actually pray for it all to come back again.

Taehyung slept less nowadays, he woke up before Jimin did and fell asleep long after his partner. Whereas with Jimin it was the opposite, he napped as soon as he hit home and then slept like a baby until late morning, when left undisturbed. From Jimin having to drag Taehyung out of bed before, it was now Taehyung who took the smaller boy in his arms each morning and carried him to the bathroom, Taehyung rested his head on the bathroom wall behind him whilst Jimin got ready for class each more, fearful that if he did not keep a watch on the sleepy boy that he would curl up on the bathroom floor and return to his endless slumber.

Jimin woke up on countless night to find Taehyung staring at the ceiling of their bedroom with such intensity it seemed like the latter was trying to burn a whole through it. Sleepily he would encircle his lover in his arms and kiss his eyes closed, hoping that there was some way or another that he could transfer some of his sleep to the restless body next to him. On other nights Jimin woke up to an empty bed, his heart racing too wildly for him to be able to think clearly as to where Taehyung was and then only to see the silhouette of the boy through the door of the balcony. Jimin had never befriended sleep like this in his life before, so telling it to release its hold on him was difficult but he would eventually climb out to persuade Taehyung to come back, because no matter how sleepy Jimin was, a bed without Taehyung was just another piece of furniture that held no meaning to him.

Over the past few weeks the pair and Jungkook had many talks, arguments accumulated like coins in a slot machine; words went around like a merry-go-round, the same things said over and over again until they lost all their meaning.

“Taehyung I can’t save you, I know we have lived the past 18 years as “we” but you have to come to terms with the fact that you are your own person,” Jimin bore into Taehyung’s eyes, he needed his lover to understand where he was coming from,”every year we get a lecture on the perception of susceptibility, it’s this concept that refers to one's perception of the risk or the chances of contracting a health disease or condition. And as for as it’s concerned most of us go through our lives thinking ‘things like that don’t happen to people like me, they only happen to people across the world, or in newspapers’, but the older you grow the more happens around you and to those that surround you, so you start to change your perception of what you may be susceptible to. For all you know I could get sepsis and die in the next few months, in that case you may never love again but you will continue to live right?” Jimin sounded like he was reading off of his lecture notes, and Taehyung was starting to lose him but was caught off guard with the last sentence.

He nodded. “But is there any point of living if you are not there with me?”

“What I am trying to get to you is that you can live without me, it may not be the life you want to live, but you will get through your days. And in that same sense, me, you and Jungkook will have to save ourselves from this mess we have created amongst us.” Being blunt was always something that had Jimin hesitated with, but the past few weeks had changed him and the boy in front of him, so it came easily to him now.

“Then save yourself from this situation, because I for sure have no idea what to do anymore. I just want to get out of this mess and stop feeling this numbness on a regular basis that’s threatening to swallow me whole,” Taehyung pressed his forehead onto Jimin’s, it was the only way he could stop himself from looking at the glassed eyes of his lover.

“I just want to convince Jungkook that he is mistaken but he is so stubborn,” Jimin breathed into the small gap between them.

* * *

And then on one of their days arguing Jimin decided he had had enough.  

“I don’t care if you can’t love me romantically, I am fine in the way we are. I don’t mind us continuing to live in the same way as we have been. All I really want is to have my soulmate already; I am tired of being mark-less.”

“Jungkook, you are only 21, you have so much time to find your soulmate.”

“I don’t care what age I am, all I know is that I am sick of being left out. You two won’t know the agony I feel sleeping alone each night and I know me being your soulmate won’t change this, but at least I will be normal in one sense.”

“You really want to waste one your chances on us? Jungkook this is not one of your video games you do realise that, this is real life?” Taehyung said with as much harshness as he could muster, ‘why won’t this fool understand it’s a waste of time for him to be doing this, it won’t work’ he thought to himself.

“I know I am using up one of my chances, and I don’t really think there are any better people to use it on than you two,” Jungkook said in a matter of fact tone.

“You can perform the ceremony with Taehyung,” came a faraway voice that belonged to Jimin.

It felt like he was committing adultery, the idea of performing the ceremony with anyone but Jimin was something that he had never imagined. He and Jimin had promised that they would live without ever performing the ceremony again in their lifetime. But Jungkook’s happiness mattered to them both and for their mutual best friend they were willing to bend this promise. ‘We’re not really breaking the promise since neither of us is performing the ceremony ourselves, the ceremony is being performed ON us,’ they both thought as an excuse.

The concept of a soulmate was a simple one: firstly, find someone you feel a special connection and love for, something you have never felt for anyone else before. Secondly, break your protective barrier and thirdly place your hand on that of your future soulmates chest, and then there would be a new mark on each of your wrists. That was all that it was meant to be.

In nursery children ran around touching their wrist to everyone else’s heart, a 4 year old’s heart being equally in love with everyone. Every image of a family that was shown at school had the parents with their wrists bare, and with the marks etched. Every cartoon that you watched as a child had half the adults with their marks proudly sketched in.  Growing up every movie you saw gave you different ways to recognise your soulmate. From a young child till you were ready to choose your own soulmate, you were bombarded with how normal it was. No one had ever expected so much pain to come out of something meant to signify love.

Jimin and Taehyung wondered how they had come to feel much anguish by a system known for its simplicity.

Jimin wanted to run away. He felt like his feet were stuck in quicksand and that every passing second he was being dragged deeper. He wanted to be back to 17, his head on Taehyung’s chest whilst they watched the morning sun paint its colours across the sky. Dreaming of their life together, like every pair of lovers ever. His eyes met Taehyung’s across the room and he knew Taehyung was doing the same. They were both thinking of the same place at the same time, because anything was better than acknowledging just how complicated things had become in the last few months.

“We’re telling you it won’t work, but go ahead and prove it for us,” Taehyung said confidently.

The blood drained out of both of Jimin and Taehyung’s bodies as Jungkook’s wrist was filled with a searing red paint and the shape of Taehyung’s heart etched into his wrist.

Jungkook turned and grinned at the two living corpses that stood in front of him.

 


	17. Tug of War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ...nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, is what it seems...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys I went to my Cardiology Ward just to see the area and my heart just grew in size? Like for the next 12 weeks your girl is going to work in the department that has interested her the most since forever???  
> It feels like a dream but I’ll try to learn lots for you all and hopefully apply it to the next few chapters... you don’t even want to know what’s coming up hehehe,
> 
> Lots of love,  
> Ruzina

Taehyung sat at the end of the bed, the carpeted floor felt more like stone under his feet. He dug his feet so hard into the carpet that it really did feel as if he was pushing hard concrete aside to create room for his feet. Fires do not last forever, there comes a point when a burning fire is forced to extinguish itself because it runs out of one of its core elements, Taehyung wishes he was like a burning fire, that one day the pain in his chest will consume itself to a point where he will no longer feel it. But at that moment he felt like the searing pain in his chest would go on forever.

Jimin kneeled on the floor. His face buried deep into Taehyung’s stomach. Breathing is a natural process for most; it is not something you think about doing, it just occurs. However at this moment Jimin was consciously teaching himself how to breathe again, ‘Inhale through the nasal cavity, the oxygen rich air will travel through your pharynx then it moves along the trachea and then the bronchi...’ he thought step by step and then began again from the start.

Jimin had gotten his arms waxed for a charity event in year 9 of high school. He remembered digging his nails into his palm to distract himself of the pain that he felt at each tug of the wax strip. On the other hand, at this moment any physical action from him was too much effort, so he used only his mind to control where his thoughts were going.

There was no downpour of rain to mirror the sadness of these two; the thunder could have been used to illustrate the sudden blast of pain each felt at every passing second but alas, there was no such beautiful weather to go along with their feelings. The air outside their window was stale; the trees were frozen as if it was one Jimin’s Polaroid pictures. The world had seemed to have stopped around them and it suited them just like that.

Taehyung stared at the white wall in front of him. The house they lived in was on rent, they were not allowed to make any permanent marks on the walls, so the pair had gone and bought the adhesive hooks that peel away easily when you no longer need them. They hung on it only one frame, it included everything they had ever loved since they could remember. There was a sketch of a Tyrannosaurus rex that Jimin drew when he was 5 years old. A picture of young Taehyung, wearing a straw hat, picking strawberries alongside his grandmother. The birthday party both had attended when they were 8 years old, of a friend they no longer remembered the name of. Jimin’s little brother the day he had won the science fair at school with all of his 3 hyungs standing behind him with the proudest grin. A picture of Taeyeon and Taehyung smiling at the beach from when they were 11. Jimin’s first dance show. Taehyung at a school show with his saxophone. The photoshoot that had occurred before their prom, both looking deeply in each other’s eyes, with no shame for their parents who were taking the pictures. The first selfie of their friendship group of 7. Their first holiday as a couple when they had saved enough money to catch a trip abroad. But in the middle of this frame was the first picture of Jimin and Taehyung. They were both four years old, arms around each other at the bright prospect of having found a new friend. Taehyung wished his and Jimin’s pain was like the adhesive hooks on the wall; temporary.

* * *

 

Jungkook was doing a handstand in his studio, he needed something to stop himself from tearing everything at reach into shreds. He was ecstatic, the prospect of having the two people he loved the most as his soulmates was something he had never dreamt of until only a few weeks back, and for it to be a reality? Surreal. But that did not take away from the anger he felt lingering at the centre of his mind, he was so close to getting what he wanted but a “promise” of some sort was stopping him.

 

The maknae always had goals for his life, to be truthful, he had too many goals than necessary but he was greedy for success and never placed a limit on how much he could take on at a time. He sang well enough to come first place at every competition he had participated in, helped with Hosoek’s dance studio whenever he was needed, made YouTube videos for a living, played the piano to a more than decent level, he could draw and paint like a profession and the list goes on. Jungkook was never the one to reach a finish line and think that’s enough, he always had other races on his mind whilst completing the first one.

Thus, now his goal was to see his heart on Jimin’s wrist, ‘it is my right after all, I am Jimin Hyung’s soulmate so why should I not get the pride of seeing him marked as mine?’ Jungkook thought restlessly, the blood circulation in his upper body was making him feel a little dizzy but he withstood the feeling.

Over the years of knowing the couple, never would Jungkook have dared to think of them as anything but soulmates. Their relationship had been, to himself and everyone who knew them, to be like a sphere; no edges or sides, no place for imperfection, just the most smooth relationship of soulmates that was ever created. However, fate had been on Jungkook’s side, ‘everything is fate, and fate is everything’ is what the saying goes and for once Jungkook was very happy with it.

“I am their soulmate, it is in my own fate as well as theirs, if I did not have Taehyung hyung’s mark I would have buried my love for both of them and called it a day,” Jungkook rationalised to himself in the mirror, you form peculiar habits living on your own, and this was one Jungkook had acquired like a badge for a boy scout. His face was a flush of red, as if he had just reached home after walking in the winter night for hours, which he was more familiar with than he wanted to admit.

Jungkook tried to recall the conversation he had had with Jimin, since Taehyung had not said a word after their ceremony but stared past Jimin’s head at the wall behind the latter. Jimin had mostly just replied with the word “no” with a mention of a “promise” of some sort, Jungkook found it hard to understand what his hyung had been saying since Jimin was gritting his teeth as if he was playing tug of war with his words.

He did not care much that Jimin was not willing to do the ceremony with him, he knew his hyungs better than most did and he was willing to give them time to come to term with his addition to their already perfectly planned future. ‘Come on, I’m not heartless’ he thought as he picked up a cup from the floor of his kitchen, Jungkook raised his eyebrows, he could not decide if he had used it for tea or to hold his brushes.

The younger boy knew well that his hyungs were in shock, ‘I’m going to be against 18 years of memories that I was not part of, but that doesn’t mean I can’t make the next 80 years’ worth it for them’ he thought with a smile, a whiff of the cup told him it had been tea after all.

The maknae made the plan that he was going to let his hyungs have two options; either they would agree to let Jimin hyung have his mark on their own or Jungkook was going to try his own ways, the latter would not be a pretty sight and Jungkook felt himself recoil at his own mind, ‘but what other options do I have?’ The young boy asked himself, not bothering to seek out any other options than the one he had already decided upon.

“What is the point of taking ages in performing the ceremony when they could just do it and get it over with? There is no other option but for Jimin hyung to be my soulmate and I prefer to see my mark on him sooner rather than later. And it’s not like I’m doing anything wrong, just making the process easier for the three of us,’ he said to himself, it sounded very logical to himself.

If only, like all the other times, Jungkook had gone to his Namjoon hyung, he would have realised just how out of place his plan was. The mark on Jungkook’s wrist had given him a sense of belonging for once in his life, and with that came the confidence to do what he liked, because surely the beating heart of Taehyung on his wrist could not be taken away from him, it was not something that ever happened to anyone. The mark was always right. Right?


	18. Cold showers and open wounds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t even express how sorry I am for this update being so late? Like it’s uncalled for and I feel like a whole ass disappointment but life has been super hectic for me, so please accept this late birthday gift from me to you.
> 
> There’s about 3 ish more chapters so please hang in there and it’ll all come clean,
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter... it’s a little painful but you guys signed up for this so :))
> 
> Lots of love,   
> Ruzina

Jimin now wore t-shirts and rolled his sleeves up high whilst going about his life. He was back to answering most of the questions fired at his lectures before the lecture answered themselves and for once he was going to lectures on time rather than hours earlier. You’d think Park Jimin was back to his normal self after the ceremony with  Jungkook , but only his close ones would have noticed the  rough edge now attached to his otherwise vibrant personality. 

 

Taehyung used to jump in autumn leaves in front of the tiny yard that the house came with, now he crushed the leaves into dust with his toes and smirked at the dust he trailed into the house, it would annoy Jimin and thus he’d be able to make it up to him in other ways.

 

Water was Jimin’s  favourite element, he never  found the right words to tell anyone why being around a large body of water calmed him down and m ade him feel centred, but everyone usually did see him run towards water with open arms and a scream of delight. That was why the groups trip to Hawaii was one of his favourites, those seven days he spent on that island he never once felt anxious. And Jimin’s love for water was also the reason why he loved baths, warm water over his body after one of his 12 hour shifts at the hospital was all that was needed to bring him back to reality and normality of life; because working in a hospital you forgot what was usual and what was not. Taehyung never really took baths but with Jimin spending about 2 hours in them at a time, Taehyung found a new love for them. Taehyung had a love hate relationship with bath soaps, he loved them because it bought the childish side out of the two and they spent  their time making things out of them and chucking the soft white cloud like substance at each other, but he hated them because they covered up Jimin’s body from his eyes, no matter how many years they had been together Taehyung took every opportunity to learn about Jimin’s ever changing body. He wanted to never fall back on knowing Jimin the best, be it inside or out. 

 

So you would think Jimin’s newly formed habit of taking two minute cold showers as soon as he woke up in the morning would have surprised Taehyung, but it was a lie since nothing really shocked the duo no longer. After what game fate had played with them, they were prepared for the worst. 

 

 

Both the pair now did not care for the soulmate system anymore. They knew it existed, but for the first time in their life they realised that the idea they had been fed since a young age about the ceremony was actually wrong and frankly they did not mind it at all anymore. 

 

They took risks more than ever before. On one of their nightly drives Jimin caught the eye of the driver in the next lane and guessed what the driver wanted for a late night mood pickup; a race. Jimin out his hand on Taehyungs thigh and smirked. The adrenaline passing through the two was more than they’d ever felt in a few  months’ time , and it wasn’t until Taehyungs lust took over that they parked the car and got on with other things that  required doing to satisfy the latter’s greed. 

 

* * *

 

Hoseok was the one who called for a group talk, the bruises on Jimin ’ s knuckles looked like they were from something different than Taehyungs mouth; they were from fights that the pair got into, whereas a few weeks back they’d have been the first to break the tension and put people at ease. And that was how all seven of the boys ended up in the same room together after a long while. 

 

“We are the closest friends you have, all three of you are our like our younger brothers and yet you decided to keep this all a secret?” Jin asked in a calm town, as the eldest of the group he knew he had to keep everyone centred. 

 

Yoongi and Namjoon both looked at the younger three a pain in their eyes that said a lot more than either could put to words. It was only Hoseok who was fuming with anger, his hands were in tight fists and his face flushed a bright crimson.  Yoongi tried to place his  hands on his soulmate’s but was thrown off with so much force that he retreated to his side of the sofa. 

 

“For months on end I’ve been asking the two of you what was wrong, after every dance class I’ve offered to talk to you because since day one I knew you two were having a rough time and you lied to me for all those days, weeks and  months. And no , I don’t want to hear about how you did not want to cause us pain. I thought we were a family for fucks sake.” Hoseok ’ s words were like venom;  Jimin and T aehyung could do nothing but to take it all in and suffer the wrath of their friend, they deserved it. 

 

Taehyung gulped hard before saying,  “We thought there was some hope that we were wrong, but after  J ungkook ’ s ceremony we realised that there  was nothing more for us to do.”

 

And thus you can imagine the uproar that Hoseok caused when Jin and Namjoon also decided to come clean with their secret, the only two that gave a reassuring nod to the couple was Jimin and Taehyung who knew the weight of a secret and the pain that comes with it. 

 

* * *

 

“Do. Not. Touch. Me.” Hoseok spelled out for  Yoongi , the latter tried for the third time to put his hands on his partners shoulder but failed. 

 

“Come on  Hobi , it was not my secret to tell, Jin and Namjoon trusted me with it and there was nothing I could do to about it.”

 

The living room of the pair had not seen just the two of them alone in months, and that was exactly what Hoseok was mad about. Yes, finding out that all five of your friends have been hiding things from you is hard enough, but what’s worse was that Hoseok could no longer contain all the anger he had for  Yoongi , the only one without a secret, for matters completely different to the rest. 

 

The younger boy could not contain any of his anger and burst like a n open dam. “You know what  Yoongi ? I should have known you would keep things from me, I should have known that after the ceremony was done that you’d tick it off your to-do list and move on. That is exactly how I have felt since the day we completed our ceremony; a fucking task off your list.” 

 

The shock that  Yoongi felt at  Hoseoks words were similar to how a heel prick feels, a bit too quick and you do not see it coming. 

 

“What on earth are you talking about?” 

 

“Look back over the past couple of months and tell me one night where you came from your studio at a reasonable time? You know I’m a dance teacher, that I work for hours on end on my feet and that I fall asleep within seconds of hitting the pillow, is there one night where you thought about me rather than your own selfish self? If you had cared enough you’d have realised that I’ve been staying up half the night thinking about where I went wrong rather than getting the rest I fucking deserve. But how would you know that when you only come to bed at 4am at night?” The words kept tumbling from Hoseok ’s mouth like toys dropping from a toddlers hand’s when they have too many to carry. 

 

“You know I’m passionate about my music, it’s the one thing that has kept me going throughout my life and all that it has thrown at me, and since we’ve done the ceremony I thought it would be okay for me to focus on it now, you know all the deadlines I’ve been given over the past few  mo - “  Yoongi would have continued but Hoseok was not the one to be on the listening side today. 

 

“- and here you go, you are proving my point exactly. You thought of the ceremony as nothing more than a chore and now that you’ve found me you no longer care  about how I am doing no longer.” Hoseok looked at  Yoongi right in the eye,  Yoongi filched at the pain he saw in his lovers eyes, ‘how did not notice this earlier?’ he thought to himself. 

 

“My love for you is still the same as before the ceremony, how can I prove that to you?” 

 

“Oh I’m not looking for proof of you love, I know that has not diminished, all I am letting you know of is how much of a selfish bastard you are,” and with that Hoseok stormed out of the room and was already in their bedroom with the lock latched on before  Yoongi could  release the breath he was holding in all this time.

 

He fell onto the sofa but did not really feel the texture of the sofa below him, his mind was floating. He had not felt this sort of numbness for a couple of years now. Yoongi had spent a large portion of his teenage years in a sort of numbness that is unexplainable, he saw the world but felt like he was not part of it. Even when he was in a room filled with the loudest voices he found himself elsewhere, found himself looking at the room from a plan view. It was like a shimmering wall was in between himself and the world in front of himself, Yoongifelt like fate had casted the Protego totalum on himselfto block any meaningful connections with anyone. Jin was the only one who sometimes had managed to cross the bridge into Yoongi’s world but he was never able to save Yoongi from it. 

 

It took the boy everything he had to change his mentality towards the world and force himself to stay focused in the present, but he eventually got as far as reaching his hands out of the invisible wall between himself and the world until creating music was able to pull him fully out.  

 

Once you experience this numbness once, the fear lingers in you like a persistent shadow.  Yoongi never truly believed he was free from it totally, even if the feeling itself did not return, he was still afraid it pouncing on him unannounced  to the point  that it sometimes felt like it was there for him, waiting with open arms for him to return to. 

 

* * *

 

Namjoon and Jin thought they had gotten over the pain of not being soulmates, but the looks on their  friend’s faces today after revealing the truth felt like their already healed wound was picked with a blunt knife all over again. 

The pair had come to the conclusion that they would take each day as it came and continue living their lives as they had done until a change was brought forth, but it was hard to completely ignore the facial expressions worn on each of the four younger boys when Jin had mentioned the reality of their situation. Thankfully all four boys had had the decency to not say anyt hing painful to them. 

The last time Namjoon had cried in  Jin’s arms was when Kim Yoon-ah had gotten one of her vaccinations and had cried every time either of her dads went to comfort her. So holding  Namjoon’s shaking body in his arms Jin tried to calm the younger boy down but with every word he managed to say the less convinced he was becoming of himself, until Jin also buried his face into  Namjoon’s neck and wept silently. Namjoon was the only person Jin would allow to his vulnerable side, he was his life partner after all. 

* * *

 

Jungkook was hyper aware of how everyone referred to Jimin and Taehyung now, to see if they would start acknowledging how they were now a trio. However this came with a disappointment, as no one really saw  Jungkook as a part of the relationship, he wanted to give everyone benefit of the doubt; that old habits die hard and that everyone would  eventually change their way of thinking, but  he  was also impatient which meant that he found it hard to swallow the idea of people not giving him  the credit where he was due it. 

The f eeling of anger was something the  maknae preferred to that of sadness, he tried to not think of  how  Yoongi’s eyebrows rose in question to  Jungkook’s mark or the slight shake of  Namjoon’s head in disbelief. He tried not to be insulted by Hoseok coming over to feel his wrist, as if questioning  its validity. Or the way Jin looked at his own wrist to see if  Jungkook’s ma rk had the essence of a tattoo, similar to the one he carried around himself. Jimin and Taehyung did not look at him at all, they were watching the digital photo frame on the mantel piece; Jin could not decide which was his favourite picture of Kim Yoon-ah so he decided to have a PowerPoint with at least a good thirty pictures of his daughter. 

And thus, if someone had invented a satellite to  capture the pain felt at a certain region, they would have seen seven bright red blotches across the city, all suffering in their own ways.


	19. Persuasion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am just so sorry for how you feel towards the characters in this chapter... i promise it'll be worth it by the end of it!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most of you are readers from my twitter and will know the past month has been a lot more than the word "hectic" can describe, placement is actually knocking the life out of me and I am basically a hallow shell of a person but here's the next chapter nonetheless!!!
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy this chapter, I have 2 more chapters to go... and since placement ends next week and i go back to uni the week after, updates will not be this infrequent,
> 
> all the love,  
> Ruzina

Jimin and Taehyung had been regularly visiting Taeyeon at the hospital, each taking turns to visit him or on some days going together, but there was something about seeing the latter boy on Jimin's doorstep that the last straw for him. The rough edges that he had been building up like a wall for the rest of the world came melting down like snow in front of a fireplace. Jimin's shoulders dropped, heart beat slowed down and his eyes brimmed up with too many tears for himself to hold back. Jimin flung his arms around the weaker boy's neck  with so much force that Taeyeon was forced to take a step back, his arms automatically wrapped around the waist of his dearest friend.

“Jimin-ah breath,” he said as he rubbed the latter's back, the door was still open and he could feel the cold autumnal air on his legs.  Jimin was sobbing so hard his breaths came in gasps, this was the first time he had cried in what felt like an eternity and there was no sign of stopping. “Please Jimin, just breath, you’ll be okay.”

Taeyeon’s eyes rested on the chaos that was Jimin’s living room, he had not been to visit for a while and felt like he had entered the wrong house by accident. Jimin’s dissertation research was going very well by the looks of the piles of books by the coffee table, but his laptop screen showed searches that were completely unrelated to his thesis. Taehyung’s clothes were on the corner near their bedroom, which Jimin usually would have caused an uproar about. The small bookshelf that was usually organised by Taehyung looked like someone had thrown all the books off in a rage and then tried to shove them all back without a second thought; and that was exactly what had happened.

The laugh that burst from Taeyeon’s mouth pierced the quietness of the morning, it caused jimin to jump up a little from where he sat.

“And I have a perfectly normal heart that hasn’t caused me to change all my life decisions,” the younger boy said, “is today ‘say the most ridiculous thing’ day Jimin?”

Jimin grasped onto Taeyeon’s hand and led him to the bedroom, where Taehyung was lying, asleep after battling most of the night with insomnia. Jimin put his wrist and Taehyung’s side by side and looked into Taehyeon’s eyes, as if to say ‘i am begging you to see the truth’.

It took more than an hour before Taeryoen could come to terms with what he had just seen. He still found it hard to believe, but he heard the desperation in Jimin’s voice and knew the boy was telling the truth. Unlike the rest there was no anger in Taeyoen that he was left in the dark, he even knew that if Jimin had not been this desperate for someone to understand him he would have not been told this secret for many more years to come; they never liked to tell him unsettling news if they could help it, his heart was weak as it was.

“I have never wanted a soulmate but after this I think my decision was right,” Taeyeon said to the limp body next to him. He could hear his twin’s breathing above him and feel the restless that he was going through.

Jimin shook his head slighly, “that is not the way to think, you can’t just not want a soulmate, me and Taehyung have been fucked over by the system but that doesn’t mean you will be too.”

“If you guys, the two boys who taught me what true love looked like, are not soulmate, then what makes you think I will ever have a chance?”

“Me, Taehyung and Jungkook are an anomaly to this system, that does not mean you have to be too.”

“Even if my soulmate came knocking at my door you know I will never say yes to them, I have been telling you this for years and still you make me repeat it,” Taeyeon said with a shake of his head.

“You cannot let your illness define you, and I as a paediatric nurse know that more than most.” Jimin turned his head slightly to look in the direction of his friend, with so much pain in his eyes that Taeyoen’s breath caught in his throat.

“I already have everyone I love suffering due to my heart condition, what makes you think that i want to add another person to the mix? I am not that selfish Jiminie.”

“Taeyeon, you have to realize that all the pain in the world is not enough to stop me from loving Taehyung, even if someone had read my fate out to me out loud and told me of everything I was going to endure, I would still never refuse to fall in love with him. I would go through all this a thousand times rather than have anyone else as the love of my life.”

“I do not understand how you can say that, surely you would rather be with someone else and not have to live through the nightmare that you are living in.”

Jimin smiled at the floor, for one second of happiness with Taehyung he was willing to live through multiple years of sadness. No questions asked.

“You have to put down your guard and let people in Taeyeon, only once you have found the love of your life will you realize what you have been missing,” a few years back, Jimin used to use the word soulmate in his lectures towards the ever defying Taeyeon, but now he was careful with the word.

Taeyeon chuckled as he said, “Why would anyone ever fall in love with me knowing I may just collapse and leave them the very next day?”

“You are not going anywhere, we won’t let you. And as for who will love you, you are a combination of me and Taehyung, so if we have people that love us, know full well that you will also be loved.”

* * *

 

“Jungkook your foolishness ought to have stopped surprising me by now but you have hit a new low,” Taehyung declared as he stood leaning on the kitchen counter. Jimin was on a night shift and Taehyung wondered what he should make for breakfast tomorrow when he returns two whole hours after his shift ought to have ended, because did nurses ever finish on time? He had learnt early on the answer to that question was a definite no.

There was a time when Taehyung would go to work without having seen Jimin since the previous evening, because he failed to return home before 9am, even when his shift ought to have ended at 8am.

“I never finish by the clock Taehyung, I only finish when everything on my to do list is complete. There is always that parent that is asking about where their child’s breakfast is, or why they have not yet been discharged, there is medicines that I have ensure are ordered and handover always takes twice the time I anticipated because of every last detail I have relay on so as to ensure the patient will have a comfortable journey.”

And hence, Taehyung grew used to the absence of Jimin in the morning after his night shift. He made sure he made breakfast for Jimin to come home to, tried his best to tidy the house and leave post it notes in every room to tell his lover know how many times he had missed his presence the previous night before falling asleep in an empty bed.

“Give me one weekend with him, that is all I ask,” Jungkook said, he knew this was a foolish request but things had not gone the way he had wished they would, so he was moving onto plan B.

“Jeon Jungkook, you really believe one weekend with Jimin is going to change his mind about his feelings for you?” Taehyung aimed each word like a bullet at Jungkook, he could not believe their maknae had lost his mind to this length.

“If you are so sure of his love for you then you would surely not have a problem with that, right?” The smirk on Jungkook’s face looked like it was drawn with a pencil that was way too sharp.

“Okay, am I missing something here or are you truly this stupid? You really think spending two nights with Jimin is going to change the way he sees you? Are you out of your mind or what?”

“Well, you seem confident that his attitude towards me will not change, and I am confident that it will. Shall we see who will win?”

“I am not betting on the love of my life, you can go fuck yourself.”

“I am not asking you to bet on him, all I am saying is that he is my soulmate and I want to spend a weekend with him to make him realise that,” Jungkook saw logic in his words that the older boy failed to see.

The maknae did not want to create any long term damage to his hyung’s relationship, just create a large enough gap for himself to slip into their love life.

“Jimin has known you are his soulmate for weeks now, and he still cannot fathom the idea of seeing you in a romantic light, I cannot believe you think so low of Jimin to think that this weekend away will change his mind, what can you give to him that I cannot?”

“Well, if you are so confident about Jimin hyung’s inability to change his mind about me, then you should not have any problems with letting him go with me then.”

The anger that Taehyung felt at the idea of Jungkook being anywhere near Jimin was enough to boil the entire oceans water.

“Just because you sleep with everyone you meet does not mean Jimin will, please do not insult him in this way.”

Jungkook would rather have been slapped by his hyung than have those words spoken to himself, but he bit the inside of his m of his mouth till he could taste iron in his mouth and continued. “Let him go with me and we will see about that,” Jungkook persisted. He was willing to do anything to reach his gaol.

“Jimin will never agree, we have not slept a night apart from each other since the day of the ceremony,” he was more confident in his boyfriend than he was in himself.

Jungkook tilted his head to the side, “it’s up to you to convince him to go with me then, let’s do this hyung, let’s see just how much you know your Jimin-ssi,” the younger boy knew he was crossing his limits, but he did not mind, he was so close to getting Taehyung to agree that he let himself speak without a filter.

“He will go with you, and he will hate you by the end of it, mark my words.” Taehyung paused, he wanted to let his words sink in before his next sentence. “Now get out of my house.”


	20. The becoming of the prophecy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe we are so close to my first ever story coming to an end. This story is my baby and I am so thankful you guys have taken the time to read it, please stay with me a little longer, i love you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, so my placement has now ended, I cannot explain to you how much the last 7 weeks on this cardiology ward has taught me, and that is not only to do with the medical/caring side, but about life and myself in general. It has pushed me to my limits, i often walked home at 9pm with my eyes closed, hoping my subconscious would lead my feet home. I have woken up at 6am the next morning, sat on my bedroom floor, staring at my white walls and thought "i really cannot do this again" and then got up and did another shift. I learnt what pure happiness is: making a ill child smile even though they are in pain, hearing from a parent that i made their childs journey more comfortable or that a worried mother went home with a light heart because they knew i would keep an eye out for her daughter. I wont write further, but i just want you guys to know that i have enjoyed the past 7 weeks a lot and i am a different person because of it. Oh... it has taught me more about cardiology which will all come into the next chapter! 
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina

It took a lot out of Taehyung before he had finally convinced Jimin to agree for this weekend away. It was a repeated cycle of:

Jimin saying, “I am not leaving you, not with your sleepless nights and the severity of your nightmares. The only thing that can pull me away from you is a night shift and that is only because your subconscious is not too cruel on you on those nights since you know I am at the hospital and also if I do not attend I will not graduate.” He would grit his teeth and shake his head, already being finished with the conversation.

“Jungkook has been going through a hard time, how would you feel if your soulmate did not love you back? I think he has taken this very well and deserves a break from all of the horrors that we have all been going through,” would be Taehyung’s reply, persistent on his goal to get Jimin to go with the maknae, failing this would convince Jungkook that Taehyung thought Jimin’s love for himself was weak and he was not giving anyone that satisfaction.

“We have enough saved for you to come with the two of us, I know me and Jungkook are going to a Youtube convention that is prepaid for, but we can surely afford you to come along.”

“I have a multi-disciplinary team meeting that will decide the changes for my coming year Jimin-ah, there is no way I will be able to miss this and keep the job.”

Night after night they argued in a similar manner until one night Taehyung was sat by the window of their living room, pouting. Jimin’s heart skipped a couple of beats, Taehyung’s cheeks looked like they were made to be held and his lips? Only belonged to Jimin to kiss. The cold seeped into Taehyung’s back, he felt the glass pane against himself and worried if the force Jimin was putting into their kiss was going to end them both on the cold grass patch underneath the window pane. He hoped it would. His hands clung onto Jimin’s hips, holding the smaller boy in place and stopping Jimin from advancing too far too quickly. It was taking everything out of him to not let Jimin tear him apart, but Taehyung remembered his goal and dug his nails into Jimin’s side.

By the end of it, Taehyung’s shoulder blades had a deep ache in them, his lips wanted more and his mind was elsewhere. There was a fierce fire burning in Jimin tonight, and Taehyung was not going to let it dim until he had persuaded Jimin to answer with a yes.

Jimin’s desire was his downfall; he answered in the affirmative.

* * *

 

Taehyung had learnt enough about sleep to formulate a plan that would stop himself from falling into its trap; the first cycle of REM sleep occurs usually around 90 minutes after falling asleep, hence he had decided he would put an alarm for an hours’ worth of sleep at any given time throughout the 48 hours that Jimin was going to be away. With how awful Taehyung’s insomnia had gotten over the past few weeks, he did not believe it would be very hard to stay up, he was already used to it. All the anxious boy had to do was make sure he woke up before he landed himself in the REM stage of his sleep.

Taehyung purposefully drove by Hoseok’s house on his return from the drive to the airport, Jimin had facetimed him during the whole ride because he had felt Taehyung’s hand shake as he hugged him and knew thing the latter boy was putting up an image of being much more stronger about the whole event than he truly felt.

Jimin cursed himself for saying yes, for being at the airport in the first place, he would have retraced his steps back home to the boy he loved, if it was not for the look on Jungkook’s face and the confirmation from Taehyung that he will look after himself. It was too late to turn around now, but a small thread of fear lined the inside of his stomach and he knew someone awful was going to come out of this.

Taehyung was surprised to see the normally bright house of his hyungs’ shrouded in darkness, not completely but enough to say that ‘we have called it a day, come back tomorrow’. The familiar light of Yoongi’s studio window was missing and anyone who knew Yoongi would have been very very surprised by this change indeed. Both the cars of the occupants were on the drive and a small slither of light was filtering through the curtains to say that Hoseok’s salt lamp was in fact turned on, casting a soft pink glow to their window. ‘How on earth is Yoongi hyung asleep before 4am?’ Taehyung thought with a laugh, he drove past feeling happy that Hoseok was finally making a dent in Yoongi’s awful sleeping habits.

Every time the thought ‘I am living through my nightmare’ threatened to crop up, Taehyung slid his mind into something else. Thinking about the taste of Jimin’s lip after long make-out sessions, or how the latter boy’s hair looked like a bird’s nest when he woke up. The feel of Jimin’s sleeping body against him at 4am at night, when Taehyung thanked the universe for making Jimin his. Or the way Jimin’s small hands were made to be held by only him. The way the smaller boy’s eyes disappeared when he laughed and the way Jimin’s cheeks glowed a shade of rose every time he was complimented, or cold for that matter. How he had seen Jimin grow from a 4 year old into a young adult that was so close to graduating in a profession that suited him so well and that he worked so hard for. All the stars in the galaxy had truly aligned in order to bring these two boys across and no one was more aware of that fact than Taehyung.

Taehyung drove himself to his favourite internet gaming café the first night, going to anyone’s house with his swirling thoughts and awful self-control would have been a disaster. All of his anger and rage that he felt he channelled into his games and only walked out at 6am to go home to change, he was going for a very early breakfast with a high school friend of his that was as busy as a bee during spring.

Being the social butterfly that Taehyung was, it did not take him long for his whole day to be scheduled in with activities with friends he had not spoken to for a while; he did not trust himself to be alone in his house and being with any one he loved dearly would mean a breakdown that he was not going to allow to occur.

It was the second night of being alone that Taehyung lost all of control.

He stood by the sink, the house littered with the aftermath of a spontaneous party that he had put together to try and occupy his mind for a little longer before all hell broke loose. He had nodded to his friend’s story about a holiday she had had in Bali, but his mind saw images of Jungkook’s hand entangled in Jimin’s hair. His eyes bore the image of his living room, overcrowded with new bodies, but his brain had supplied him countless images of Jimin arching his back to receive more of Jungkook. Taehyung’s ears heard the sounds glasses clicking and people talking but only one audio was being replayed on loop in his mind; Jimin moaning Jungkook’s name.

And he cried. The glasses on the counter were pushed onto the floor. Having the house alone to himself for the first time in the whole day, the heartbroken boy found peace in throwing the four chairs that usually were neatly tucked under the table across the room. His screams filled the room and found it to be too small to contain and escaped into the neighbourhood.  Jin’s fruit bowl lay in pieces, just like the way Taehyung’s heart felt, at his feet.

“Who needs to sleep to get nightmares when you can just live through them?” As far as Taehyung was convinced, Jimin had left him for Jungkook and finally made the prophecy that had haunted him come true.


	21. Loose Ends - Part 1/3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is part 1/3, I have completed writing the full story and was going to post it all here but as the writer I would not get the intended effect if it was all put into one chapter, and hence why it’s coming in three separate posts. It’s a lot of loose endings to tie up and one chapter is definitely a little too much, I want you guys to absorb the little details uwu.  
> I will post the second part tomorrow at 7am (KST)and the third part the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> /sigh/ long time no see! I’m ever so sorry for how long this update has taken me, it’s appalling I know :( I’ve been on holiday for a month and then my third hospital placement started the very next day and all in all we’ve had 2 very chaotic months. I was so worried everyone would have forgotten the story by now ahaha but hope you guys will enjoy the story and will be happy by the ending that I have given it. Please do leave any predictions or comments here or tweet/dm them to me @vminne95 on twitter. Thank you so much for waiting so long,
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina

Jimin had thrown his backpack on the sofa in the living-room as the words, “Taehyung-ah! I’m home!” simultaneously left his mouth. 

The boy in concern watched the newcomer’s every move from the gap in the kitchen door. His eyes did not miss the newly made marks on Jimin’s hips. They were way too fresh to have been made by Taehyung more than 2 days ago. 

And as the traveller removed his coat and hung it on the coat rack, Taehyung also noticed the bruise on his lover’s neck, not made by him, he was sure. 

Taehyung dug his nails into the dent in the kitchen that Jimin had made a few years back with his keys, it was uneven and caused his nails to snap, the dent was filled with fresh blood that Jimin smelt before he saw. 

Within a split second he had crossed the room to his boyfriend, only for Taehyung to step back and press himself against the kitchen counter. 

“Do.Not.Touch.Me.” His head felt light and he knew if he did not dig his feet into the kitchen floor, he’d collapse any moment. 

“Taehyung you are bleeding, what in fresh hell do you mean do not touch me. Are you out of your mind?” He stepped forward with his hands outstretched, nearly grasping at the former’s hand but missing by just a split second and clutching at thin air. 

Taehyung had moved but had not made it far before he hit the kitchen door, the throbbing in his fingers was making things seem a little blurry so he slid down and sat on the floor. Jimin had never seen Taehyung look so small, it reminded him of the many patients he had met on his wards that had been subjected to domestic violence and now recoiled at any physical touch. Every inch of Jimin was in pain, he did not know what past crime he had committed to have to be subjected to see the love of his life in this state but he knew it must have been one big fuck up. 

“Keep your dirty hands off of me,” he sighed into the room. His arms wrapped around his knees and he was shaking, Jimin sat on the floor, making sure not to touch any part of the boy in front of him, he did not know how much smaller Taehyung could make himself without it becoming painful. He did not want to take in whatever his lover was saying, he was probably out of his mind due to the lack of sleep.

“Taehy-“

“Don’t even say my name anymore. Keep my name out of your filthy mouth Park. I don’t want anything to do with you, just go back to him.” 

“What? Back to who? All my life I have always returned to you, I am sorry but I am feeling extremely left out in this conversation that you seem to be having with yourself.” 

“Did he give it to you good?”

“What are you even talking about?”

“Did his name taste as good when saying it as mine does?”

“WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT,” Jimin repeated for the second time in a row, he did not have the time to construct any newly formed sentences. 

“Did Jungkook make you beg for more?” 

Jimin covered his ears and screamed. He doesn’t know where to go. Their already small kitchen turned even smaller, he felt like Alice in wonderland, his usually small body today feeling like a giant’s. His brain suddenly felt way too large for his skull and he just wanted to get away. To hide. Nothing seemed like it was right and he would have bolted out of the door if Taehyung wasn’t sat leaning against it. 

“You think I slept with Jungkook?” Jimin stood up like a flash of light and was standing as far from the recoiling boy at the door as possible. He suddenly also did not want to touch Taehyung, something had snapped between them. Maybe it’s name was trust. 

“There is nothing to ‘think’ about. What else could you have possibly got up to during your weekend away? Also,” he did not finish his sentence but stared straight at the mark on Jimin’s neck. 

Jimin’s hand flew to where Taehyung’s gaze lingered, “Oh no, Taehyung no. It’s not what you think.” He was rubbing at the bruise as if it was made by a felt tip pen that would disappear if he rubbed hard enough.

“If you were going to cheat on me you could have at least told him not to leave huge ass marks on you,” the boy on the floor laughed, but even that became too much for him and he closed his eyes for a few seconds. 

Jimin was no longer in the small kitchen that had felt suffocating to him a moment ago but in the hotel room where the content creators of the Youtube Convention were staying at, the room had all of its features blurred but he remembered Jungkook sat on the bed whilst he himself was sat on the chair that came with the dresser table. Jungkook was one of the best sportsman Jimin had come to meet in his lifetime but that night whilst they were throwing a rubber ball that the maknae so happened to have on him, he had looked past Jimin and had “accidentally” thrown it at his neck. The rubber ball had flown in an angle that Jimin now realised to have not been unintentional at all, because how the fuck do you miss someone’s hand and hit their neck instead? Especially if you are Jeon Jungkook and your aim was better than an Olympians.

He shivered as he came back into the present, and when he told Taehyung all of this in broken words that felt like he was unsure of what he himself was saying, the latter just blinked as if to say, “Do I look like I am five years old to you?” 

But rather than voicing what he thought he asked, “And the marks on your hip? Was that also caused by this miraculous rubber ball that Jungkook so happened to take with him to a Youtube Convention?” 

The words were cutting into Jimin like a blunt knife onto wood, but he was going to fight his case, Taehyung’s wellbeing was concerned with all this after all.

“Jungkook had managed to get his Youtuber convention card lodged between the wall and the dresser the next morning and whilst I was reaching for it, he had come from the back and moved my body across so he could reach for it himself, it was just slightly out of his reach. That meant I was lodged between him and the dresser table’s corner.” Jimin raised his sweatshirt up, “look, see how it’s a sort of triangle shape?” 

Taehyung looked at the his boyfriends hip, the shape already memorised by him years back, and saw that Jimin was in fact right; those marks were not left by a human’s hands or lips at all.

The atmosphere in the room had altered and now Taehyung felt like a fool for ever thinking. That Jimin, who had never looked at another guy in a romantic manner than himself, would ever do such a thing. But he was in love and being a fool was just a by-product of this. Jimin’s anger also had dissipated because he knew he would have thought the same if he had been in Taehyung’s place; Jimin empathetic self let him put himself into the shoes of nearly every person he met, and his boyfriend’s thoughts he knew better than anyone else’s. 

But Taehyung was not done yet, he was going to clear up everything that had clouded his mind over the past 48 hours.

“Wait, so why are you not as scared of losing me as I am of you?” Taehyung's eyes sparked open, “did you always harbour feelings for Jungkook?” 

It felt like a new line of attack. “For fucks sake Taehyung, please speak with at least some thought behind your words,” Jimin was all fire with his words once again.

“You’re not answering me though, did you have more than best friend feelings for Jungkook? Answer me Park Jimin.” 

Jimin felt his name being spat with so much hate that his heartbeat felt slower, he dug his nails into his palms to remind himself of a physical pain that was greater than the one he felt emotionally. He felt lightheaded, ‘why is he being so god damn stupid for’ he thought. 

“I’m talking to you,” Taehyung growled, “answer me or else I’ll form my own answer and you will be hurt by it.” 

“I have only ever loved you Taehyung, and until my last breath I will only love you. I will die before I think of anyone else in the way I think of you.” Jimin didn’t know what else to say, those words he said as slowly and with as much precision as he could muster, he knew any hesitation would kill Taehyung there and then and he couldn’t afford that. 

“Then why in nearly all of your texts over the weekend did you you keep on talking about ‘trying’ to be different with Jungkook?”

“I’m just trying to think of a solution where all of us will be happy, I’m trying to be logical,” Jimin put his hands up as if in surrender, he didn’t know how else to be any more clear. 

“Fuck your logic Mr Smartass, this isn’t the time for your stupid rationality, we’re not in maths class where you have to solve for x, you may have been the class president for 9 years but you are for sure useless when it comes to understanding that this is about emotions and feelings. Which you seem to lack right now,” the younger boy cursed himself as soon as the words had left his lips, he wanted to take all the words back, why did he keep saying things he did not mean? 

Jimin picked up the closest thing to hand, a plate that his partner had left to dry by the sink, and hurled it across at the wall opposite. His cheeks were a painful shade of red that made Taehyung recoil into himself. Jimin was shaking all over, no words seemingly able to be escape his mouth. 

The ceramic plate burst with vibrant colours, neither of the even pair flinched at the flying parts shooting at them, they had worse things to deal with right now. 

“Kim Taehyung,” Jimin’s words were coming out staggered, he was speaking with his teeth gritted, “you have to realise we are all different people, we do not all think the same way and we do not for sure deal with emotions the same way. You have known me for 18 years and yet today you seem to have forgotten every one of my characteristics over your jealousy. I am utterly tired of having to constantly prove myself for you. Do you know how much energy it takes to be on guard constantly? To always have to pick the perfect words so you can’t pick them apart and accuse me of something I didn’t mean to say?” Jimin wanted to stop, but words were pouring out like an over spilling glass of coke when the foam gathers at the top at a speed that you cannot control, “you would never know how it is to feel like you are never good enough with your words or actions because the love of your life is a jealous bitch.” Jimin breathed the last sentence into existence knowing full well Taehyung would feel it like a slap across his face. 

“And lastly, the reason why I do not constantly question you is because I trust you. I have trusted you from the day I met you, when I handed you my favourite dinosaur when we were four years old and I have continued ever since . At first with objects, then with secrets as we grew older and then with my heart as you become the love of my life. You will never experience the pain of feeling like you have not done enough because your lover cannot seem to trust you,” the pain across Jimin’s chest was overwhelming, it was like the tendons in his heart were overstretched or that his semilunar valves were not doing their job and had allowed a backflow of blood to enter his heart by mistake. 

And that was when for the first time in the last 48 hours Taehyung had closed his eyes and did not feel a sense of dread tightening at his throat. And he fell asleep. 

Before he hit the ground sideways Jimin was there to catch him into his arms. “You fool, you absolute train-wreck.” Jimin whispered as he held the slender boy in his arms and nuzzled his nose into his hair. He knew full well that Taehyung had not slept a wink restfully because he was too afraid of what he would dream of. His tears spilled into the sleeping boys head, “I am so sorry I could never give you the assurance that you have given me, I am ever so sorry. No matter what words you launch at me, it will never be as painful as knowing that I am soulmate to someone else. Someone…that… is…not…you.” Jimin’s last words came as a sob, he had lost all control of his words and mind too. The pain that he felt could not be overridden by anything he had ever felt so far, and thankfully this would be the last time too. 

Because before the two boys had even gotten to their bedroom for the night, they had received a call; it was about Taeyeon. He was in a critical condition but no one knew what was the matter with him because for some reason his cardiac notes had been locked away by a so called Dr Sang-Hoon. What the pair did not know was that this particular doctor was in fact dead, and had taken all of Taeyeon’s notes with him.


	22. Loose Ends- Part 2/3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys will enjoy this update; the question in the synopsis of "what could have possibly gone wrong in their love?" is answered in this chapter. I cannot believe you guys will now know the one factor that has led to this whole story of 23 chapters to have been created. It's been a long 8 months of me having kept this secret to myself, glad it's finally out in the open. I will publish 3/3 tomorrow at a similar time to this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly love how even after what Jungkook has done, everyone is still worried for him. It makes me very happy that I have been successful in making you guys fall in love with him so hard that now no matter what he does you still love him ahaha. And he'll be okay, trust me on this. Tomorrow's update includes all ot7 for anyone wondering. 
> 
> Lots of love,   
> Ruzina

“Okay, let me just get this clear; we were used as a pair of lab rats? Is that what you are trying to get at or am I just losing my mind here?” Taehyung’s eyes tried to adjust to the darkness of the tiny room he and Jimin had managed to hunt down and barge into. 

Jimin had gotten up from the computer desk as if pushed out by a set of springs. And then they were running, no words were shared between the duo, but Taehyung knew his compass in life was always going to be Jimin and so he followed without any questions. 

The trolleys at the side of the long hall ways, the astray bed waiting to be taken into a ward that was already overfilled, and the yellow signs that clearly said “Careful! Cleaning In Progress” was ignored as if they were not physical objects at all. Jimin’s mind had an image of a room where he had seen that name badge, that one name that was a red warning flag all over Taeyeon’s medical notes from when he was born. 

The research department was on the ground floor, unlike the rest of the hospital, this department got a lot of the funding, and thus the newly painted bright yellow of each pair of double doors was like a mockery to the way Taehyung felt. His legs felt numb and he didn’t know just how long he would be able to continue following jimin. Each door they passed was marked with a different image and a name, the last one he’d passed was called “Atrium” and the one before it the “Apex”. ‘So we are going in alphabetical order I see,’ thought Taehyung. Your sense of observation heightens when dread and fear is all you can feel in your heart, it’s a way of coping and not letting the emotion engulf you into it’s black hole without a promise of ever letting you go. 

The research department looking so pristine and new did not surprise him at all, in the world that they lived in, every single university had a whole degree dedicated to the heart, and every hospital had a wing of researchers solely to figure out everything to do with the cardiac system. No human, or animal for that matter, ever died these days of a heart problem and that was why Taeyeon’s condition came as such a shock to everyone that looked after him; no one knew why his heart did not respond to the exceptionally well researched treatments that he received.

Unlike Taehyung, Jimin was not looking at the large names written in vibrant colours on the wall, but at the smaller cards attached to each door that told you names of the researchers living in that room, because as researchers you really didn’t have a home, these tiny cubicles became your whole life and living-hood. 

The room they had entered just a few moments ago was painted in white but the lamp on the side cast a dark shadow to everything residing in it. What took the pair of boys by surprise was not the contrast of lighting between the hallway and the room but at the simplicity of it all; they’d imagined a room filled with books, papers with scrawny writing littered everywhere and at least 12 old coffee cups that the researcher had not gotten around to throwing away. The claustrophobia they felt came not from the room being overcrowded, but by the lack of anything being there at all. 

“Precisely. I’m glad I did not have to say those words out loud myself, thank you for saving me from wasting my breath in explaining.” 

“Mind my language, but how the fuck was that even allowed to be done? What happened to the billions of policies each hospital has as to what happens to a child. How could you have just let that happen and no one finds out until after 2 whole decades?” Taehyung was glaring at the middle aged man sat on the one chair that the room held. He dug his toes deeply at the floor, to hold him down before he burst upwards and out through the roof. His mind was a cluster of thoughts, similar to that of a bacterial culture under a microscope. 

“Jimin, you’re a student nurse, please make him read the Francis report, maybe that’ll make things clearer for him.” The words were said in a voice that said he was already bored with the current flow of the conversation they were having and his eyes kept straying to the door. The two boys were a distraction that kept him from getting back to his research and he wanted them to get the hint that they were not as welcome as they had made themselves feel like they were. 

“But things like that don’t happen in this day and age; surely we have had enough government policies to stop anything like this from ever occurring. The immorality of the research is just too immense. You cannot just perform a surgery of that kind without getting consent from the parents, I have been in operation theatres over the past 3 years and I know the consent policies off by heart,-”

Jimin was not able to continue, the yawn that escaped the researcher stopped his words forming a complete sentence. “He was the head of the cardiology ward, not sure how much knowledge you kids have of that sort of thing but let me just say that no one got past him. Every decision made on that wing of the hospital went through him. He was a greedy bastard that wanted to test a hypothesis that he knew no one was immoral enough to have trailed as of it. And so he did it himself.” He paused, just from the past few moments of the pair being in the room he’d already figured out that they were going to bombard him with questions. He was right.

“But surely someone in that surgery room would have noticed what was going on and did something about it, you can’t just watch something like that happen and walk away unaffected.” 

A grin crept on the man’s face, like a cat does along the thin fence in the back of a garden, “Well, I did.”

“I know that the surgeon who messed with Taehyung and Taeyeon had no emotional understanding of how the normal human being worked, but I feel like you have a large gap in the place where your heart would typically be orientated.” The bitterness in Jimin’s voice could have been compared to the taste of balsam pears. 

“Oh so you expect me, a student at that time, to have stopped my whole career from progressing even before it had started because I was going to try and stop the most powerful cardiologist in our hospital from doing whatever he wanted to do? Come on, I know both of you are under stress right now, but do be a little sensible.” 

‘Stress, what a word to describe the crumbling of our lives right in front of our eyes, glad he did not become a psychologist of any sort because fuck would he have been a bad one.’ Taehyung thought, looking at Jimin and knowing the expression the smaller boy wore was the one mirrored on his own face. 

The researcher cast his eye above to the ceiling, a projector was hung there. Neither of the boys saw any movement but the small flicker of his eyes. And then Jimin screamed and stepped back until his heels touched the far wall. Taehyung was instantly by his side, a hand instinctively wrapped around his waist. If anything was going to happen, it was going to happen to both or neither, Taehyung would make sure of that. 

“Is that Taehyung’s heart you have projected on the floor?” 

“Well aren't you a bright one? You have never seen his heart so I am surprised you know the way it looks.” 

“I always told you I would lay my heart at your feet if you asked me to Jimin-ah, and look where we are now. I never lie, do I?” There was a smile on Taehyung’s face that Jimin had not seen for months, if he was not fascinated by the projection of his boyfriend’s 3D heart on the floor, he would have cried and told Taehyung just how much he missed the younger, less hurt version of him. 

You would think Taehyung would be enchanted to see his own heart, beating in real time at his foot, but he was more mesmerised by the look of awe plastered across his soulmate’s face. There was a glow in his eyes and a flush to his cheek, Jimin was capturing this in his memory for the rest of his life and Taehyung was not going to take this opportunity from him, so he gave the smaller boy a squeeze and leaned more into him. 

“Ahem, sorry to ruin your moment but I really do not get paid enough for you to be wasting my time here,” the middle aged man was a bit too old for romance of this kind and stayed as far as possible from it. 

“Can we see Jimin’s heart projected like this?” To Taehyung, after what he had seen and heard, anything was possible now. 

The man in his chair gave a sudden laugh and with a laser pointed to a black dot in the left side of Taehyung’s heart. 

“Taehyung... they have been tracking your heart since you were born.” Jimin said in a low whisper, disbelief entangling at his throat and making it hard for him to speak.

“Ah great, not was I a fucking lab rat to be tested on but every beating of my heart was also tracked, anything else i need to be made aware of before I leave this cursed room?” 

“You know the yearly tests that were done as routine for you and Taeyeon? Yes, about those...” there was a slight glimmer of a laugh behind his words, as if all this was just a bit of a break from his monotonous days of research. 

Taehyung thought of every hospital visit, every complication of Taeyeon that he had also got tested for, “because it may help find a cure for your brother, you are identical twins after all.” It was all a lie. The yearly tests done on him were not routine ones at all, but a way to monitor any patterns that he and Taeyeon was presenting with. One thing he was yet to find out was about the checking of his marked wrist; but the emotionless researcher took pride in telling the pair this, he had no care in the world of what he was projecting onto the boys. 

Every part of Taehyung wanted to break something, anything, the pain he felt was being translated to anger and he wanted to destroy everything insight; too bad the room he was in barely had anything but a chair, table and an overhead projector. Maybe they were not the first ones to have been told of such a truth, maybe that was the reason for the bareness of the square room they were currently feeling suffocated in.

“But there was no routine test for me and Taeyeon last year, we just skipped it entirely, we called up but there was no answer on the phone that normally picks up our call no matter what time we call at. That one phone number was what saved Taeyeon from being transferred to Accident and Emergency, since we always saw our own personal consultant each and every time.” 

“I’m sorry to break it down to you, but you and your brother are not the special snowflakes that you were led to believe you are. The reason why you did not see your consultant last year was because he died on the 22nd of February.” 

“And that was how no one ever found out about the operation done on the pair when they were born, because no other doctor ever saw them but Dr Jung Sang-Hoon. No one was ever given the opportunity to view the scans or ECGs done on them, because as soon as Taeyeon got ill he was seen immediately by him…” Jimin breathed the word into the room not really feeling like he was present in it at all, his mind was swimming in images of the same doctor, that small room where he held Taeyeon's hand every time he was admitted, the same set of nurses always looking after the duo. He wanted to slap himself across the face, over the past three years of his training he had become well accustomed to a whole team of healthcare professionals looking after any one patient, so how had he not seen this coming?

If he had voiced this to Taehyung, the younger boy would have reassured him with the knowledge that old habits die hard, if from the age of 4 he was accustomed to seeing the same behaviour at the hospital, it would be hard to recognise the difference now that he was more aware of how a hospital was ran and how care was given. 

“Wait, did you say the 22nd of February?” Taehyung asked, the date meant everything to him and much more.

At the nod of the researcher, a grin blossomed on the pairs face. If Dr Jung Sang-Hoon had just lived for one more day he would have found out the answer to his thesis. But the two boys were not going to tell the researcher this; that they had performed their soulmate ceremony on the 23rd of February that same year. 

Out of all the things that they had found out today, this was the only thing that made them happy. To know that this doctor’s attempts at this immoral testing went to waste and that he would never ever find out what actually happened to the twins. The saying of “Do good and good will come to you” is what Jimin and Taehyung grew up with, and the fact that it worked in reverse caused them a sense of euphoria that they did not know they had the right to feel with how life was treating them currently. 

“Do you guys honestly always act this in sync all the time? I know practically all the medical notes of Taehyung off by heart but I did not know he was diagnosed with being creepy too.” 

If the two boys had any liking for the man in front of them they would have laughed, but from what they could tell he was not trying to be funny at all. Just speaking of an observation he had made. 

“What part did you play in this game of Dr Sang-Hoon?”

“When the study began I was a student, just starting out in the medical field and you and your twin were my first theatre case. That was where Jimin saw my name indented into the notes, I was the one in charge of the notes and if they were good enough then Sang-Hoon signed underneath and that was that. I have not been part of this paper ever since then, but as I was allowed the pass code to access your medical history, to enter that days notes, I have been accessing them ever since. Too bad the actual research paper died with the bastard. I have been trying to contact his secretary since the day he died but to no avail. The asshole was not going to let anyone but himself publish the paper. I even tried to get a hacker to try and get into his databases but he had wiped it all clean before I got there. Now my question to you is, how did you see my name on that one note and come here to my office?” 

“I came here to be tested on my knowledge on diabetes type 1 a few weeks ago.”

Jimin’s mind went to the first day of this diabetic week, he had been given a worn out brown chair to sit on at the back of the tiny office where 6 nurses were already stationed; the room offered no space for a student, but they made do. He had his legs on a box of newly bought in insulin pumps, his head lodged into the coats of the occupants of the room. An Ipad on the counter next to him, and a booklet on his lap, he had spent the morning absorbing all the information he could about this new topic. He had not particularly minded his state of being, he was in a place filled with happy people and learning something new, what more could he ask for. Then came the afternoon where the anxiety tightened his stomach and with clammy hands he walked behind the nurse who would supposedly test him on what he had been able to gain so far from the morning. He felt like he was a sponge left at the side of a sink, allowed to soak in whatever he could, just for everything to be squeezed out of him at a later time. It was on the walk to the assessment room that he had trailed his hands lazily at all the doors he passed, glazing over the rooms and the researchers that they held in them. He was trying to distract himself from the inevitable doom of him not doing his best on the test, scoring 100/100 on tests as a child at school left you with this sort of feeling as an adult. 

What he did not know was that, that distraction was going to be the reason why Taeyeon was saved today. 

“My twin brother is dying in some ward above us, please tell us what we need to do to save him. I don’t care if I have to dig that unscrupulous cardiologist up, i will do it, but I am not losing my twin brother.”

“Jimin, I want to see how much you have taken in, as a student nurse you must be used to this so I will ask; and what do you suggest we do?,” Jimin could hear all of his previous mentors voice in his head, this was a question he got asked at every situation for the past year. In your third year of being a student, there was no mercy, you were put on the spot to make every decision a qualified nurse would make, because or else how would you ever learn? 

“Taehyung, at birth your heart was swapped with Taeyeon’s, and now we have to return the hearts to their original owners.” Jimin said matter-of-factly. 

Because the three-dimensional heart that was now being turned on its axis, by the eye moment of the researcher, was Taehyung’s heart indeed, however it currently resided in the body of a weak boy dying a few hospital floors above.


	23. Loose Ends- 3/3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * Gratitude: I cannot explain just how much this story means to me and all that it has bought me over the past 8 months. It was meant to be 5 chapters,,, that didnt happen ahaha. I have been writing bits and bobs since I was in my early teens but I never published anything like this for an audience. I really did go hard on my first ever work; multiple chapters and involving a plot that I myself found hard to grasp at times, but I am so grateful for the way it was received by you all. I am grateful for every comment, kudos, twitter mention and dm I have ever gotten with regards to this story. There is no one language that I can use to thank you all for being on this very bumpy ride with me. I really do hope all the time you spent reading this was worth it.  
> * Further works: I have posted my second fic that I am working on; it is called Accursed and is another soulmate au and you guessed it; heavy angst ahaha :) Please give it a try, it would make the ending of marked wrists a lot easier for my heart ahaha,  
> * Sequel: I am thinking of writing a sequel to this, but with the future families of everyone; this will be domestic fluff on the most part. Please leave a comment if you will be interested in something like this, I really want to stay in this universe for just a bit longer ;((  
> * Again, with all my heart, Thank you for your love and support, 
> 
> All the love,  
> Ruzina

As Taehyung lies on his bed in the small anaesthetic room just before the operating theatre, he can’t help but notice the art on the ceiling, it's a colourful array of flowers in a garden that seems a lot like an enchanted one. Like the anesthesia it was also trying to draw you into a world of unknown. 

"You would like the art in the children's anaesthesia room," Jimin had entered without anyone else in the room noticing, he was gowned in surgical scrubs, light blue in colour, and he had a mask covering up most of his face. "It’s a live projection of an aquarium, forget the kids, I myself find it mesmerising. I sometimes watch it to see how many times I can spot the same baby shark whilst each child gets put under the anaesthetic. The quickest was a three year old; I only saw the baby shark about 4 times, whereas a 7 year old once put up such a fuss that I had lost count by the time his head turned to the left and we all knew we’d finally won the battle over him."

There was an allure of professionalism in the way Jimin held himself, his gaze swift and quick, going from one machine to another, not really making any eye contact with Taehyung. If the latter did not have a job he would have spent most of his day sat across the room from Jimin watching him work; professionality bought a sexy appeal to Jimin that he definitely got turned on by.

Both the operating department practitioners left to enter the surgery room for a while, they had injected something or the other in every limb of Taehyung’s but he only noticed this once they had left and the quietness of the room engulfed the pair like a warm blanket on a winter morning.

There was a part of Jimin that wished his mask would cover his eyes too, the tears were brimming up to the top threatening to spill and he was not going to let that happen; for one his professional image was at stack but most importantly Taehyung did not need this sort of emotional pain just before he entered the operating theatre for the second time in his life. This time where Jimin himself had made sure every document was signed by a practitioner he knew by name and could trace back without a single doubt.  

Seeing the love of his life on a aesthetic table, hooked up to more machines than he could care to name was not something he had ever wished to see happen, but he had lost faith in the health sector for the first time in his three years of being a student and had asked the consultant if he could join, it was an emergency operation with the bare minimum staff; they had agreed without much of a fuss. 

“Jimin-ah, look at me,” Taehyung tried to get up only to realise he had a catheter in each of his arms and his legs and a few other places which he did not wish to name, or look at for that matter. He fell back onto the bed and called again, “Jimin, there is no way anything is going to go wrong with this, you yourself have seen this operation loads of times, come on. Have more faith in the system.”

“You’ll be going for a heart bypass, your whole heart system will be taken over by a fucking machine and you want me to be okay? Ha.” The boy in the over-used scrubs and way too heavy shoes bit the inside of his cheeks, this was not the time to get angry, and he needed to keep calm until they put Taehyung out. 

“Come here,” Taehyung gingerly put out a hand that his lover grasped as if it was his only chance at staying alive, “I will be fine, you’ve charmed your way into the operating theatre even though I begged you not too. You will make sure me and Taeyoen are okay, even if you have lost trust in the healthcare system, you have not lost trust in yourself. I know you will see me and my twin brother through this awful nightmare.”

Jimin winced at the words but he knew Taehyung was right. He was going to get both of these brothers back to the other side of this deep ocean the three were drowning in, even if it meant the end of himself.  

They both knew Taehyung had no choice but to do this, Jimin would have done the same if he had been in the others position. They were never going to forgive themselves if anything happened to Taeyeon, ever. 

And it was just before the anaesthesia hit Taehyung that Jimin whispered, “Come back happily to me, my everything.” The younger boy closed his eyes as the drug hit his blood system and within a split second he was out like a light. That was Jimin let his tears to spill, they were absorbed into his cotton mask before anyone had the chance to look up and in a similar manner to Taehyung, the student nurse blinked his eyes and was ready to carry out his duties once again. 

On Jimin’s first ever cardiac operation, the nearly retiring Operating Department Practitioner had warned him, “It will be extremely noisy in there, if at any point you feel overwhelmed inform someone in the room or just walk out. The last thing we want is another casualty,” she had winked at the novice in question and gone onto measuring out the drugs that she was responsible for. But the one thing no one tells you about an open heart surgery is not about the gruesome image of the beating heart or the loudness of the machine; it is about the smell of burning flesh. It had hit Jimin’s nostrils and made him feel sick to the stomach. He had watched the two screens at the either side of the large room to distract himself from the smell but in the end had escaped to spray his mask with his body mist; it was the only reason why he had gotten through those 7 hours he had been in that theatre. 

That operation had been on a 6 year old with an atrial septal defect, he was never going to forget standing on the wobbly stool the anaesthetic had dragged from the storeroom. Jimin had later learned that this was the famous stool that every student had at least once stood on during their undergraduate years. The already small boy felt even minute in the room of qualified that looked like they could do this with blindfolds on. ‘If this stool wobbles just a bit more I will fall right onto this small boys head,’ he had thought, but he had been unable to drag himself away; there was no chance that he was willing to give up such an opportunity as seeing a beating heart lose its momentum and becoming still, or the way a clump of dead flesh comes back to life again.

* * *

 

Yanking off the mask Jimin walked out of the ward that both the twins would now be held in for a few hours whilst their observations would be taken every fifteen minute to ensure no complications were caused; they already had their own one-to-one nurses and did not need Jimin any further. 

If the nearly qualified nurse had any more emotions left in him he would have waited around for the two boys to come around but unfortunately he had not; he wanted a break and his footsteps led him to the one place no one had yet found him hiding on his night shifts. 

The alphabet’s on the floor still remained, they were well looked after and Jimin was sure it would be a century before anyone changed the carpets. At the age of 4 he had no idea just exactly where the overflowing amount of toys had come from, but as student he had learnt about the bitter truth quick enough. He wanted to curl up on the sofa where himself and Taehyung had spent many a night sleeping whilst Taeyeon got diagnosed with whatever he had caught that week, all anyone ever knew was that Taeyeon’s immune system was as low as the boys confidence but no one ever suspected to look at his heart. 

But he did no such thing; there was someone who needed to be spoken to, because as much as all this changed the duo’s life, it also changed this third persons life in a similar manner.

“So the reason why I have always felt calmer with Taehyung hyung than anyone else was because he had Taeyeon hyung’s heart in him and Taeyeon hyung is my soulmate.” Jungkook took the words out of his mouth as if they were being dragged out by a rope. 

Jimin nodded. “That’s also the reason why Taeyeon found comfort in me throughout his years at the hospital, he had Taehyung’s heart and it was at peace whilst being near mine.”

“So if you had done the ceremony with me you would have not had a mark left on you because I was never your soulmate in the first place,” the statement sounded more like a question, Jungkook’s mind was swimming like a piece of forgotten rice crispy in a milk bowl. 

Jungkook’s whole body shook as if he was out in the winter night rather than being enclosed in the warmth of the children’s playroom. “Let me get this straight, both the hyungs had the same cardiology consultant throughout their entire life because he was not willing to give anyone else the twins records?” The maknae continued when he saw that Jimin was not going to correct him, “And he performed a heart swap on the twin because he wanted to study how the soulmate system would work if the two people in love did not have the correct heart that they were born with.”

“They were both born with a simple aortic stenosis and with how advanced our cardiology surgeons are, they had decided to get the operation done on the day they were born. This had been decided from the ultra-sound done whilst they were still in the womb, what no one knew was that the consent form had been manipulated, more like discarded, and the asshole had completed a whole heart transplant in both the babies.” The older boy cleared up with a sigh, the morning sun would be greeting them in a few hours and he had never felt a night longer than this in his life, which was a big statement from a student nurse who’d spent many a night on a ward where the biggest amount of activity came from the overhead lights swinging as the door closed.  

“And the reason for the recent hospitalisation was because this doctor had died and there was no longer anyone managing his cardiac symptoms, but how come only Taeyeon hyung has had these problems and not Taehyung hyung too?” Jungkook hated being in the unknown, especially when it concerned people he loved. He had been quizzing the already very drained older boy for a while now. 

“Taehyung was the bigger twin in the womb, so when the heart transplant had occurred it had meant that he got a heart that was slightly smaller than the one he had been born with but his body was able to cope with it and the heart learnt to adapt to the smaller heart without much complications. Taeyeon had the short end of the stick, he had received a heart that was already a lot bigger than his body. So here’s a bit of anatomy for you;   an enlarged left ventricle increases the risk of heart failure. In heart failure, your heart muscle weakens, and the ventricles stretch to the point that the heart can't pump blood efficiently throughout your body and you get complications like blood clotting and heart murmur. And the worse is cardiac failure which Taeyeon had gone through yesterday because of the poor management of his cardiac treatment since his consultant had died.”

“But what about the current cardiology ward? How did they not fix him already?”

“Well look, a heart transplant for no apparent reason is not something that comes up to every consultant looking after a new patient. And in Taeyeon’s case, literally no doctor or nurse had any contact with him at all since he was always wheeled over to that fucker on admission. They have been trying to possibly gain as much knowledge on him as possible, but they would never tell the patient or their family about this; the lawsuit would cost the hospital way too much than they are willing to lose.” Jimin exclaimed, using the back of his hands to rub away at the sleep that was encircling his mind like crows over dead meat.

“What a big cock up.” Was all that the younger lad could conjure. 

“This is what greed does to you, makes you run the lives of others without ever thinking of anything but your own personal gain.”

Jungkook’s face lost all of it’s colour, he felt like his head had been dunked into a frozen lake. His throat constricted, but he knew he had to say something. He had no explanation for the way he had acted, he was hot headed and had not really looked at the bigger picture. 

“Hyung,” The maknae begun unsteadily. 

“It’s okay. You were just craving love and did what you thought was needed to gain it. You didn’t know I was not your soulmate because all the evidence pointed to me being it, so don't worry, you are fine with me and Taehyung.”

“But… I tired to create misunderstanding between you and-”

“Mine and Taehyung’s relationship is a lot stronger than anyone preserves. It did not take long before I had managed to explain to him what had happened.” Jimin thought of the words, which felt like poison at the time, that taehyung had spat out at him, but that was only because he was emotionally drained and weak with all the things they had been going through. He was not going to let Jungkook know what had occured between them earlier that night, he would preserve his other half’s reputation till the very end. 

“I messed up so bad,” Jungkook said, his eyes could not meet the older boy’s, they felt laden with shame.

“You were doing what you thought you needed to do to gain your soulmate, I understand that and hold nothing against you.” Jimin’s mouth had run dry, all he wanted was Taehyung to be back so they could go home and just sleep for an eternity. He did not want to deal with life any longer. 

“How can you be so understanding all the time? Surely it must cost you so much emotionally, constantly putting yourself in other people’s shoes. Do you ever walk in your own shoes Jimin hyung? This sort of selflessness cannot be healthy in the long run.”

A weak laugh escaped Jimin. “Don’t worry Kookie, I have enough emotional openness to feel my own and a whole armies worth of emotions. Taehyung keeps me in check and Hoseok hyung is there to draw the stress out of me as if we’re playing a tug of war with words, and let me tell you; he always wins.” 

Jungkook’s head whipped to look behind him because suddenly he had seen the whole of Jimin’s face change into an expression that he did not recognise. 

Taehyung stood by the door, his operating gown still on, barefooted and with a observation machine on wheels that was beeping all the while that he stood there.

The younger boy saw him and realised what this meant; Taeyeon must also have recovered by now. 

Jungkook found himself facing a long bare corridor, he took small steps at first, there was something pulling him back. A part of him was grieving the fact that his first loves were never destined for him. But the words; “Taeyoen is like a mosaic of the two of us, his personality is a combination of us as a pair. Whilst growing up he absorbed us in, it’s what happens when you spend nearly all of your time together,” said by both Jimin and Taehyung on many occasions, repeated in his head over and over again. It was as if Taeyeon had always been written for him, and his falling in love with his hyung’s was just a trial for what was to come. He finally had a soulmate to call his own, one whom he did not have to fight for because Taeyoen was his and his only. 

And for the first time in Jungkook’s life, he ran, not away from life, but towards it. 

* * *

 

A pair of four year olds had met for the first in a playroom of a hospital, and once again, nineteen years later, they stood in the same room, one boy at the door and the other across the room from himself. The past nineteen years had changed them and everything surrounding them; the way they perceived the world to be laid out, their perception of how life worked and the general gist of just being a human being. From two strangers meeting for the first time they had become each other’s worlds. And thus their steps felt like they were dragging lead behind them; it was the weight of all the memories they had collected together. With each step they took a year passed between them, a year of laughter and joy, pain and anger but most importantly of love. 

Taehyung pressed his forehead to Jimin’s and their noses touched too, if you were to watch from a plan view it would be hard to recognise who’s tear dropped first onto the alphabet painted carpet. Their tears mixed and fell as one, their breath rose and fell in a similar manner too. 

Taehyung shakily took Jimin’s right hand, for the second time in their lives they were going to do the ceremony. With the palm of Jimin’s hand he moved the gown that his lover wore, and Taehyung pressed the smaller boys wrist to his heart. 

The pain that burnt Jimin’s wrist was something he ought to have felt that night nearly two years ago, but fate had destined for him to feel a different type of pain altogether for those two very very long years that had redefined what Taehyung meant to him. 

Friend, boyfriend, lover, other half were all the words that for the first time Jimin could disregard because Taehyung was in fact his soulmate.

They kissed, slowly at first; it was a way of saying sorry. Sorry for not having believed you. Sorry for all the painful things we have endured. Sorry for the last time because there is no way I will ever hurt you again. But also a way of saying; I love you and always will. 

* * *

 

“You did what?” Yoongi asked in disbelief. ‘When can we just be seven normal men and not have these shocking reveals, oh god when?’ He thought. ‘I just want to be average again!’ 

The eight of them were cramped up in Min-Jung living-room. The sitting space would not have been much of a problem if a certain couple did not manage to occupy a whole sofa to themself. “When will their honeymoon period be over? I am sick and tired of having to sit on the floor, my old bones cannot take this disrespect any further.” Jin had commented when he and Namjoon had entered the room. 

“Kim Yoon-ah is not your daughter legally?” Jungkook asked, lifting his head slightly from Taeyeon’s lap. They were the pair that was the cause all of Jin’s current problems. 

“She has been our daughter from the day she was born, actually no, she has been ours from even before she was born.” 

“And a piece of paper is not going to change the fact that she means the entire world to us.” Namjoon completed for his soulmate. 

“The accident was caused because her biological mother was drink driving, there was not a single fault of ours. It was just fated for the two of to have been at that same location at the same time.” 

The couple had driven the pregnant lady to the hospital like any other human being would have done, what they did not know was that by the end of the hospital visit they would be coming back home with their own small part of the galaxy. 

“How on earth did you manage to convince them to give her to you both, surely you cannot just hand someone’s baby over to two complete stranger,” Taehyung spoke for the first time, he had been busy trying to untangle himself from a thread of Jimin’s shirt that he had managed to hook to his pinky finger. 

“We lied.” 

Until now the room had been in pindrop silence, but after this certain phrase it felt like the occupants of the room had been enclosed off into a vacuum of some sort. 

“We told the hospital we were in a polygamous relationship with Kim Yoon-ah’s mother. As Jimin knows, you cannot suspect someone’s relationship, they are constantly changing and so no one had anything against us. There is no way of asking for evidence either, so we got away with it. Her mother was in a critical condition and did not live past the delivery.”

“But her mother must have had family that knew you two were strangers to her.” 

“You know I have connections with literally everyone important in this city, it took me two calls to find out that she herself had been in foster care since she was five days old. Her foster parents had taken her from the hospital to their home.” Jin sighed as he continued, “It was like history was repeating itself, but unlike her mother, Kim Yoon-ah is going to live her best life with us.”

“And her father was in jail when she was being born. He would never have been given permission to raise her, never in a million years. Everything is fate and fate is everything; we all know that. And that was the reason why we were there on the day that accident took place. Because no one would be able to give Kim Yoon-ah the future that we will give her,” stated Namjoon, he was giving his opinion but it may as well have been facts for all that mattered to himself and the rest of the room. 

Namjoon and Jin’s hospital visit had been cut short on the day they had gone to visit the twins after their heart surgery. After hearing the story of their maknae’s, the duo had gotten into their car and was driving at a speed limit that was definitely at least 30 miles above what was allowed. The pair had come to terms that they were never meant to be soulmates, but that they would continue loving each other nonetheless. A mark was not going to change the way they were a family, but the prospect of something new being in the horizon had lit their hopes up again, like a withered away flower getting another chance at survival. 

The pair knelt down to be at the level of their sunshine’s eyes. Both had agreed without any words in particular that even if this did not work it would not change them at all. It was just an idea at something new. That was all. 

Jin caressed the sleepily girls hair and Namjoon pulled down one leg of her pyjama trouser. Respectively, they took a hand each of their daughter and pressed it to where their hearts were and within seconds the Kim family were all in tears. Kim Yoon-ah because “Dad my hands sting and it won’t go away!” And the pair because not only were they each other’s soulmates, but of Kim Yoon-ah’s too. Fate had written them to have a platonic soulmate rather than a romantic one and they could not be happier, their little daughter was their whole universe after-all. All the last five years of pain felt like a drop of water into a ocean at the prospect of their happy family always being together for the rest of eternity. 

After the accident the pregnant mother had needed blood transfusions, and a lot of it too. With luck being at her side, she was AB+ and could receive blood from both Namjoon and Jin. Which led Kim Yoon-ah’s heart to have been filled with the blood of both of her future dads and with a helping hand from fate and a little magic, it meant her future was written to her being their soulmate. 

The stacks of books at the side of the tv caught everyone’s eye as they had entered, three words were in common in all of the titles; life, work and balance. Yoongi had moved his studio to his companies building and was now working 9-5, five days a week. This strict regime was the only way he knew he would get his life back on track. He had realised that his unhealthy working hours were affecting his and Hoseok’s relationship and before things went too far he wanted to rectify this. He knew he would be working for the next 40 years of his life at the least, but every year with Hoseok that was passing he would never ever get back. With every passing year he wanted to make a new set of memories with the boy who had held his hand as he had fought for himself in the drowning sea of self-pity. 

Hoseok had now cut down the hours he spent doing the admin side for his dance studio; the new generation of k-pop was bringing in a whole surge of new dancers to his door and that enabled him to gain enough profit to have his own personal secretary. He only spent his time doing what he loved; dancing and teaching others to dance. He was the happiest he had been in years and it only glowed out of him and reflected in the people around him. 

There was a mini competition that the couple was having with Namjoon, unfortunately for the literature teacher, he did not even know he was a part of such a thing! The pair was trying to read as many philosophical and “life-changing” books as possible each, until all they wanted to do was scream at each other’s face because “dude, if you don't take this book from me I may just end up burning it and the house alongside it,” and Yoongi would go over and kiss Hoseok on the nose and do something else to take his mind off for the rest of the night. They wanted to join in Namjoon at torturing the maknae’s with 3 hour long lectures about the concept of life too, he should not be the only one having this much fun!

The group watched the two boys on the couch, it was a new site to their always fire burning, never staying in one place and constantly moving from one project to another maknae, settling in to a new sort of life. A life where he stayed home and spent his nights listening to Taeyeon talk, his thumb softly caressing the cheek of the recovering boy. Legs wrapped tightly around the other boys body as if to say; you have spent enough time alone in the coldness of your hospital beds, now it’s time to get used to the warmth of happiness and love. The newly found soulmates had a lot to catch up on, they had nearly 2 decades worth of chapters to finish reading of each other’s life, write the one they were currently living in and plan for the many more that were to come. 

Taeyeon had a lot of love to give, having spent all of his life fearing a romantic relationship because his future was always so uncertain. But now the boy lived fearlessly, gave his all and Jungkook was the perfect recipient, he had a lot of pain he was slowly replacing with love. Taeyeon maybe have been the one who had gotten a bypass open heart surgery done at the hospital, but Jungkook was also going a similar manner, just emotionally rather than physically.

* * *

 

 

Epilogue 

The Sunday morning sun was seeping through the window, their white bed sheets looking like a soft cloud the pair had settled down in for an eternity of calmness. A certain peace had blown into their lives like the beautiful cherry blossoms in the streets of Japan during spring. The pair of soulmates were slowly returning to their former selves of being the extroverted loud boys that they were, and Taehyung thought life could really not be getting any better, he was wrong; it was going to get even more spectacular.

“Baby,” Jimin said with sleep still encircling his mind. Taehyung was sat up in bed, softly watching the smaller boy curled up, battling to get rid of the reminisce of sleep that fought to keep him in it’s trap, keeping him away from his soulmate. Taehyung’s heart beat grew stronger and Jimin’s wrist twitched. ‘Oh shit, calm down you little thing!’ Taehyung scolded his heart, he was still getting used to the idea of Jimin knowing exactly how his heartbeat was feeling against his wrist.

“Yes, Jimin-sii,”

“No, i mean baby,”

Taehyung felt a tightening in his chest, Jimin was currently not on his hospital placement. He had graduated and was taking a small break before getting his first job as a qualified nurse. ‘Did he have a nightmare? Oh please no, I have just stopped getting my nightmares only a few months back, we cannot be doing this all over again.’

Jimin’s eyes opened softly, he took in the boy sat crossed legged on the bed, and took a deep breath. Their eyes met and he said, “Taehyung-ah, I mean OUR baby.”

It did not take very long for Taehyung to get what his soulmate meant. The pair had spent a large portion of their teenage years looking after children in various volunteering opportunities and in their young adult lives had chosen that they were both going to have careers that involve looking after children that needed their help the most.

The two of them were silent for a while, remembering all the promises and dreams of having their own little family in the future. The park benches where they had watched toddlers take unsteady steps towards their parents and how their chests had tightened with the wish that one day the same would happen to them too. The hours they had spent together in the baby clothes section of a shopping mall with Jimin saying, “Is this how we will feel when we have little children of our own?” Whilst holding shoes that were the size of his thumb. Jimin seeing Taehyung hold his arms out like he was an airplane behind a bunch of kids on a rooftop whilst on holiday in America, his stomach dropping and feeling like it did not exist at all because he had at that moment seen a glimpse of a future that could be theirs. Taehyung’s mind took him to their holiday in Hawaii when they had seen a little girl, with way too large headphones for her tiny ears, and how Jimin had been unable to stop himself from going over and holding her hands in his, the spark of love in his eyes was enough to render Taehyung speechless for a while, before he too joined Jimin.

“Do you think they’ll let us adopt like 8 kids at once or,” Taehyung’s eyes were sparkling, he could already see them struggling to get into bed with them, Jimin would be leaning against the side trying to pick up their little son to his side and Taehyung turning around to pull their daughter onto his lap.

Jimin could hear their own family langage where the word “appa” meant kiss and “yummy” meant sharing their food together. He saw Taehyung’s cheek turned to their little darling as he waited to get his morning kiss. Or how she would scamper from Taehyung's lap to cuddle in with himself, whilst their son swapped places to go and kiss his other dad.

But for the present Taehyung opened his arms and Jimin closed the gap between them. They kissed but were too giddy with happiness at first so they stopped just to giggle before continuing. And then before they knew it they were both lying in a tangled mess in the bed, tickling each other until the house rang with laughter.

Happiness never suited anyone as much as them.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To clarify: Taehyung was born with Jimin's heart shape engraved into his wrist, so when he performed the ceremony with Jimin it worked. Jimin was born with Taehyung's heart shaped engraved into his wrist, however when he performed the ceremony it did not work as Taehyung had the wrong heart to the one he was born with.
> 
> I told you guys I would give them all a happy ending, did you see it coming?  
> Thank you for supporting my first work, I hope you will read my further works and give it lots of love too. I love you all from the bottom of my heart, 
> 
> Love,  
> Ruzina

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave any comments you have regarding the story, my writing in itself and any improvements I could make. Or any suggestions of what I could include in the upcoming chapters.   
> Please share the story in any way you like, wherever you like, all I want is people to find happiness in my writing.


End file.
